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AIBU?

Toddlers and the latest corona announcement

87 replies

Purpleflashingunicorn · 29/05/2020 18:20

Apologies if this has already been discussed, I couldn’t find any threads about it.

Am I right in thinking that nothing has changed in regards to the announcement if you have toddlers as they obviously don’t understand social distancing? there’s a few people on facebook who I know through nursery who seem so excited but have toddlers like I do and I’m just sitting here wondering, how can you keep a toddler at a distance from people for more than 3 minutes? Especially when it’s family that they’ve missed so much! Am I missing something?
I was hoping so much that the announcement was going to include some sort of good news for us but came away so disappointed as I have an extremely energetic toddler who I don’t feel I could social distance from family, putting them and us at risk.

Willing to be told that I’ve missed something and I’m entirely wrong!

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RedskyAtnight · 29/05/2020 18:24

Many people will have heard "it's ok to meet other people in your garden" and be quietly ignoring the "staying 2m apart" bit. Or they will decide it doesn't apply to under 5s.
If you're strictly following the "rules" and can't trust your toddler not to run to other people, then it makes no difference.

Same way it makes no difference to people whose family are shielding or too far away to visit as a day trip.

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PintOfGin · 29/05/2020 18:28

I feel the same OP. I have a two year old and he wouldn't understand staying 2m away from people he loves that he hasn't seen in months due to lockdown- even if I physically enforced it he would be so so upset that it wouldn't be worth it to be honest. So nothing has changed for us and It's so frustrating.

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Haworthia · 29/05/2020 18:29

You can’t.

My son has just turned 5 and is autistic. I can’t take him to see his grandparents because he has no concept of social distancing. It would be cruel to even try to enforce it.

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Tomorrowillbeachicken · 29/05/2020 18:31

The regulations brought out last week aren’t even 2m though for little ones, they are upto 3.5 metres.

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pigsDOfly · 29/05/2020 18:33

I think people often don't think things through.

They're hearing about the easing of lockdown and before you know it it'll be a free for all.

I've seen it recently where I live: groups of kids meeting up, parents allowing children to play on playground equipment, adults ignoring distancing.

And this whole thing with Dominic Cummings ignoring the lockdown rules seems to be making a lot of people, who can't seem to think for themselves, decide that if he can do it so can I.

It probably won't be long before we have a rise in infections.

I think it's too soon to ease things, the death rate has come down but it still isn't that low, the R rate is only just under 1 and test and trace is not up and running properly.

I do wonder how much of this easing has been decided on to take the heat off Cummings and Johnson.

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justanotherneighinparadise · 29/05/2020 18:33

I think people are just ignoring that bit of it. I can’t as my DP is vulnerable so I need to minimise the risk as much as I can.

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Duckyneedsaclean · 29/05/2020 18:34

If you have toddlers who won't distance you could have friends / relatives over to your garden in the evening?

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pigsDOfly · 29/05/2020 18:34

Sorry, my post went off on a bit of a tangent.

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SandieCheeks · 29/05/2020 18:35

@Tomorrowillbeachicken I think you're confusing the floor space requirements for early years settings with social distancing? The floor space requirements are just a way of deciding how many children a nursery/childminder can take - it doesn't mean toddlers have to be 3.5m apart.

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Purpleflashingunicorn · 29/05/2020 18:40

PintOfGin exactly this! It wouldn’t be worth the upset caused in saying she can’t hug her nanny or grandpa.

I’m surprised that anyone can play the ignorance card to the 2m rule, he very clearly said and reiterated that 6 people could meet ONLY if the strictest social distancing was met of 2m apart etc

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ScarfLadysBag · 29/05/2020 18:46

We had one of DD's little friends round today (in Scotland so slightly different) and we decided we wouldn't enforce strict SDing with them as it just wasn't feasible. It's the first child she's interacted with in more than two months. The adults stayed distanced and we encouraged the kids to do stuff that meant they stayed apart, but both sets of parents were comfortable with the risk as we've all been quite strict about staying home. We've not even been in a shop for eight weeks, so we are as low risk now as we will ever be.

It'll be more tricky in the weeks ahead I think when people are gradually widening their social circles and starting going back to a more normal kind of existence. But I think there comes a point when you have to use common sense, really.

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peajotter · 29/05/2020 18:46

Use a buggy.

Or have a clingy toddler like my current one. We just had a distant picnic in the park with another family, and she spent the whole time on my lap asking to go home.

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jb1305uk · 29/05/2020 18:47

I took my 3 year old to my parents garden for a visit today. My dad had put a fence across half of it to maintain social distancing. A little difficult for my child to understand at first but they did settle and it worked well. Still not great but at least we could see each other

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OnlyFoolsnMothers · 29/05/2020 18:48

My nursery opens as of next wk so I don’t see the need to keep toddlers away from relatives unless the relative is at risk/ doesn’t feel comfortable

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AgentCooper · 29/05/2020 18:49

Same here. DS is 2.5 and it looks like nothing will be changing for us unless we decide to forget the 2m rule.

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MargeryB · 29/05/2020 18:50

Surely you meet your parents (or whoever) without the toddler? I have been meeting my dad for a walk without kids for that very reason.

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PeppasMuddyPuddles · 29/05/2020 18:51

DD is 2 and wont stay away from her relatives, shes missing them lots & I wouldn't upset her by trying to keep her 2m away from them. We are not changing what we are doing at the moment and still staying away from people. Will rethink obviously when she goes back to nursery but I'm not planning to do that for a few more weeks either.

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YinuCeatleAyru · 29/05/2020 18:51

I agree a toddler can't distance willingly but parents can anticipate and think of solutions for this - there are popup playpens, toddler reins and all sorts of things that can be used to keep a toddler safely in the correct location.

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welcometohell · 29/05/2020 18:52

I agree that a lot of people are ignoring the finer detail and have just chosen to hear "i can have a gathering of 6 people". Also some parents will be thinking if it's ok for their child to go to a nursery or childminder it's ok for them to mix with others.

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UnderTheBus · 29/05/2020 18:55

Depends on the child. My 3yo is fine with distancing as long as she isn't given free reign. Stick her in a paddling pool, give her a sticker book or a picnic and shes fine. Not all day obviously but for an hour or so.

With a younger child, take a pushchair or carrier and keep them in it. Or meet up at a time when they're napping or after bedtime.

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Squishsquashed · 29/05/2020 18:55

I understand why it's necessary but I do feel sad about it. I'm not worried about me, I just want my toddler to have some fun and social interaction. She's started running away from anyone we see on walks, I think she thinks it's a game, but I am worried about it. I think it would be very detrimental to drag her back from loved relatives to keep 2m away so we aren't seeing them and nothing changed for us.

DH asks her about her day every day and all she can really say is that she walked the dog, every day. I try to help her elaborate like "and we saw those ladybirds/climbed that log/got home and did stickers" but it breaks my heart really because she used to have so much to say about her day.

I know nothing can be done, just sad about it really.

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ineedaholidaynow · 29/05/2020 18:56

When the government finally say you don’t have to keep the 2m distance the risk of the virus will still be there, it won’t magically go away.

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DontStandSoCloseToMe · 29/05/2020 18:56

I could strap my toddler into a buggy, put him in a play pen etc but isn't it more cruel to say oh here's grandma but she's not going to give you a hug and you can't even go over to her, at 18 months he won't understand and will likely just be upset

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kittlesticks · 29/05/2020 18:57

I think we are now in the territory where people can apply a bit of common sense. Nursery and school will start for some on Monday. Our nursery isn't going to open but either way it was my plan not to send the children to nursery at first and use that time to reconnect with family. I think the risks within my family are currently low, as both kids have only been at home or on local walks, DH is working at home.

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UnderTheBus · 29/05/2020 18:57

Toddler reins another good idea.

Also you don't phrase it as "you can't hug grandma" just distract them with other things or even make up a lie - grandma has a poorly back so she can't pick you up but why don't you come and pick daisies with mummy?

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