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AIBU?

MIL wants DC to visit her mother

15 replies

Flower34 · 28/05/2020 07:37

MILs mother is 90. She lives 2 doors from
MIL. Now that the rules have been relaxed a bit, she wants DC to spend a day this weekend at hers to cheer her up. I said nothing yet, but I think it’s too early given her age (and medical conditions). DH agreed but MIL very pushy. Aibu to think we should wait a few more weeks ?

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Am I being unreasonable?

38 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
11%
You are NOT being unreasonable
89%
Mrsjayy · 28/05/2020 07:43

Surely a visit 2m apart won't do any harm if you all harm if you all have been following lockdown,what do you think will happen?

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PrayingandHoping · 28/05/2020 07:46

The rules have been relaxed but this is not within the rules. You can meet 1 other person, 2m apart in a public place

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Flower34 · 28/05/2020 07:48

We have been visiting her all through. Spent time on her front garden etc. MIL wants the kids INSIDE the house now - for the whole day

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Mrsjayy · 28/05/2020 07:49

Has your husband not seen his grandmother ?

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Anniegetyourgun · 28/05/2020 07:50

Is her mother very rich? Is she trying to kill her off?

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Mrsjayy · 28/05/2020 07:51

Oh nobody is allowed inside homes are they? I wouldn't either not for the day a couple of hours in the garden would be my limit.

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PrayingandHoping · 28/05/2020 07:54

Well if you've broken the rules throughout lockdown then only u can decide what to do next as clearly the guidelines don't bother your family.

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Mrsjayy · 28/05/2020 07:57

Standing in a front garden isn't breaking the rules

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PrayingandHoping · 28/05/2020 08:07

It is if it's a group of people (grandparent, parents, grandkids) You're allowed to meet 1 other person, 2m away (in a public place which I know many think includes gardens)

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hellsbells99 · 28/05/2020 08:11

I would stick to just visiting in the garden. Going in the house increases the risk especially as it is an elderly person you are visiting.

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namesnames · 28/05/2020 08:14

Just stick to the guidelines.

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User8008135 · 28/05/2020 08:16

Not inside i wouldnt, garden definitely.

The bigger issue than rules is your DHs mum trying to pressure you both when you've both declined. Is she normally like that or is this just lockdown exacerbating? You need to set boundaries.

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Flower34 · 28/05/2020 08:35

To clarify, we = DH and I. All through the lockdown we’ve been visiting GM for delivering groceries, meds etc. We spent time with GM chatting from the front garden, while she was inside by the window. She saw the children after months just a few days ago, that too from a distance (waved and kisses from the car). My kids are close to her, esp the eldest. She is missing them I know!
Mil isn’t trying to kill her or anything, lol. At times she can be very pushy!

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JudyCoolibar · 28/05/2020 08:49

For a moment there I read "DC" in your heading as Dominic Cummings. Go on, I'm sure he'd be happy to visit your GMIL, he could check out his eyesight again.

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Mrsjayy · 28/05/2020 09:33

I would try and placate Mil with a garden visit say you want things to go back to normal of course but atm the "rules" are outside only.

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