Livery yard using my horse as companion!

[MadameEqualiser]

Hello. I moved my horse to a lovely livery yard about six months ago. I am happy with the care but there is one thing. They have insisted on putting my horse in a paddock with a very stressy and sometimes dangerous mare. All the other liveries have individual paddocks. Both horses are on full livery and I feel the manager uses my horse to keep the other one calm (used to weave all day before). The result of this is that I can't do anything with my horse in the evenings (I work full time) as they are out in the paddock and I can't take my horse out. I can't go over in the day when they are in as I am working and I can't even go to see my horse safely in the field. The only time I get is at weekends during the day when they are in. The manager and the other horse's owner are good friends. The owner hardly ever goes to see her horse though. I feel like me and my horse are being used. I live alone and have been working from home during lockdown so seeing my horse in the evening is really important. I also suffer from depression and my mental health is suffering. My horse is 24 and needs to be doing some sort of exercise every day. She also has arthritic hocks. She's been kicked a few times and I have been almost been kicked in the head more than once. I have finally insisted they are split up but have been made to feel like a nuisance. I know I am not being unreasonable and have made my feelings clear. I feel so upset though. I want to look for another yard but there are very few in my area 😥

[Purplewithred]

I’m not quite sure what makes this yard ‘lovely’, if the people have arranged things so you can’t see your horse safely. Is there no alternative locally?

[RedHelenB]

As above

[Throckmorton]

They are taking the piss. Surely as part of full livery you should be able to access your horse whenever you want. Also, surely they have a massive liability issue letting you (and your horse) get injured but a known-to-be-dangerous horse.

I know it's not easy, but if you can move yards, I would

[DrawingLife]

Good on you for standing up for yourself and your horse!

[PolkaDotsPolka]

Is there an alternative yard you can use? I'd suggest moving your horse.

[UnhappyMondays]

Why can’t you just catch your horse out of the field after work? If she is hard to catch or there’s another reason, then just tell the livery owner not to let her out until after you’ve been?

[Shadowboy]

If you are paying full livery rates then you’ll probably be paying a lot of money. Go and get your horse in and ride it- the YO cannot stop you.

Alternatively I’d leave. Not worth stressing yourself- go and enjoy your horse.

[UnhappyMondays]

Sorry posted too soon - but if for whatever reason you can’t get your horse, just ask (and fully expect) the livery owner to help you catch your horse (as she caused the situation).

[Honeyroar]

I imagine she means the actual stable and facilities Arles lovely..

You were absolutely right to insist that your horse not be put out with the other horse, and you are absolutely not being a nuisance. I’m a livery yard owner and wouldn’t want my liveries risking their necks in with a nuisance horse. I would have the awkward horse in a sectioned off part of my own field, not be relying on a livery.

[Twofurrycatsagain]

I'm not quite sure why you can't access your horse in an evening? Because it's dangerous to go in the paddock with the other one?
But I'd be insisting that your horse is in a separate paddock, like the other full liveries, or find another yard.
You are a paying customer. Insist on what you are paying for. I wonder if other customers have had the same problem before you arrived.

[Cherrysoup]

You’re not unreasonable, I’ve been seriously pissed off that it was hard to catch in my horse because one of the others was acting dangerously and I couldn’t get near mine while naughty huge horse was playing up. Just ignore their antics if you want to stay and insist your horse is never turned out with stressy mare. It isn’t safe and it isn’t your horse’s job to calm down Mrs Stressy.

[DiseasesOfTheSheep]

I would not be paying full livery prices to keep a horse in a manner that was inconvenient for me. You should be able to ride your horse pretty much whenever you want.

[Beautiful3]

Send them a comprehensive email explaining how you feel. See what they say. If you dont get the right answer then move again.

[TARSCOUT]

Well done for standing up for yourself, and why wouldn't you. You are paying for a service and that is the service you should get.

[MrsOfBebbanburg]

Does the YO understand that you pay her, not the other way round? That if you say your horse is to be paddocked alone then that’s exactly what happens, because otherwise you take your horse elsewhere and he/she loses all the money you pay him/her and you tell everyone why? Do they understand that’s how it works? Maybe you should spell that out to them.

[clipclop5]

YANBU to insist on having your horse moved, especially if they have been kicked. The yard owner may not like it but tough, you pay them enough to deal with stuff like this.

[CrazyToast]

Not unreasonable. You are paying them to provided a space and care for your horse. You have a right to do what you want with your horse, where you want, and have a say in where it stays on the yard. You are paying them for this. I really would leave if they continue to be arsy about it.

[Judiwench]

Wow, who knew how much bother horses could be!

Good on you OP, stand your ground.

[manitobajane]

I'd write to them

Desr CF,

Despite having spoken to you X times about my horse being in the same field as naughty gee gee I see that he is still there.

According to our contract my horse will have a separate space to use during the day which is not shared with another horse unless by prior written agreement which we do not have.

I am unable to safely collect my horse from the field and therefore am unable to ride him. This is not an acceptable state of affairs and I need my horse to be moved to his own field forthwith.

If this is not possible please let me know so I can start choosing a new livery yard to move him to as you are unable to meet my needs or those of my horse.

[Judiwench]

@manitobajane

I'd write to them

Desr CF,

Despite having spoken to you X times about my horse being in the same field as naughty gee gee I see that he is still there.

According to our contract my horse will have a separate space to use during the day which is not shared with another horse unless by prior written agreement which we do not have.

I am unable to safely collect my horse from the field and therefore am unable to ride him. This is not an acceptable state of affairs and I need my horse to be moved to his own field forthwith.

If this is not possible please let me know so I can start choosing a new livery yard to move him to as you are unable to meet my needs or those of my horse.

It sounds like youve resolved it so this would be heavy handed....

[JovialNickname]

You're so not being unreasonable - 99% for YANBU so you're definitely in the right! They're taking the mickey, good on you for standing up for yourself and your horse.

[MaryLennoxsScowl]

Why are livery and riding schools frequently such complete twats? It happens so often (livery owners on this thread are lovely exceptions, I hope!) and they either put people off riding or endanger them or just give them a shit time so they don’t go back. My mum had such hassle at such expense with livery that she ended up selling her horse as she knew she wasn’t going to be in a position to buy land again for a long time and they made what should have been a lovely relaxing leisure activity into a stressful pain in the arse and they let the teenage hangers-on take her horse (who wasn’t an easy ride) out for hacks and one fell off and the horse was briefly lost - and my mum had no idea they’d even been riding it, let alone letting teenagers on a horse they couldn’t control. She felt she couldn’t trust them at all.

[manitobajane]

OK I'll shut up then!

[AlCalavicci]

I would at first try to find a compromise if you like everything else about the yard , good yards are bloody hard to fine ,
Can your horse and stressed horse be put in paddocks next to each other so you can safely get to your horse but it will still have the calming affect of your horse been close by .?
Tell the yard owner that they must bring your horse in by x oclock ? added bonus that once they have had close encounters of the hoof kind they will see your point of view regarding it not been safe for you to collect your own horse,
This should only be done if you think your horse wont be hurt by the other one while in the shared paddock

I do feel for you my friend was in a similar situation , the shared paddock was big enough for 5 /6 horses so the same groups were always turned out together , ( the yard had 6 paddocks and two fields so plenty of space for all the horse's ) no problems at all .
Until they were brought back in and my friend wanted to go on a hack , one horse in would go nuts trying to get out of its stable , so my friend was told she could only go on a hack when lonely horse could go with her , lonely horses owner worked shifts so they rarely met but agreed on a plan .

After months of slowly separating them by moving the stables further apart , bring one of them in a bit early or putting it out a bit later so eventually they were not in the paddock together at all lonely horse got better and was ok .
Yard owner them for god knows what reason decided to treat them and put them back out together 6 months of hard work and dedication from the owners and yard staff was wiped out in 10 minuets

[MadameEqualiser]

Thank you all for your support. Yes, the actual yard is lovely, It's in a great spot, the owner is very nice as are the other clients. The actual management is spot on. I cannot complain about that. The yard manager can be very nice too, but seems to have a blind spot about this one thing. Having been at a yard I liked for 12 years I have now moved three times in the last four years. Was on DIY but now have to travel for work quite a bit and they couldn't cover. One was okay but had a serious colic problem, the other stopped winter turnout which wasn't good for my oldie. I can't get my horse out of the paddock with the other horse there. I have suggested they leave mine in and I'll put her out when I am done but the manager says if I get trampled by this mare the other horse will be running around all night. Thanks then! She is rather a control freak and I think a bit put out as when we arrived I wasn't riding due to my mare being stiff from being in 24/7. She doesn't ride her own horses. One is on box rest but the other is totally sound. I am now doing stuff again and I think the YM and this mare's owner have got the green eyed monster thing going on. Had horses for 30 years and it's getting harder and harder to find good yards. Probably won't get another horse after this one has gone ☹