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AIBU?

Noisy neighbour children

123 replies

AvenueQ · 27/05/2020 10:02

They spend a lot of time in the garden and are incapable of playing without CONSTANT screaming and shouting. The parents never ask them to play more quietly. Usually the parents are inside with doors shut.
Is there anything I can do???

OP posts:
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Confrontayshunme · 27/05/2020 10:15

I try to keep my kids quiet, but frankly, most people are trying to work so the screaming alternative is right by their face. My neighbour is elderly so enjoys the distraction and has told me not to shush them though. Everyone's nerves are frayed. Try to let it go.

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Windyatthebeach · 27/05/2020 10:27

Play some un child friendly tunes. Eminem will have them taking the dc indoors pretty quickly...

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TheFlis12345 · 27/05/2020 10:32

I feel your pain. Our neighbours leave their young children in the garden to screech relentlessly at all hours and make little attempt to entertain them or quieten them down. The dad also talks into his phone at such a volume you can hear him 3 streets away so I know where they get the lack of volume control from.

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Kezmum14 · 27/05/2020 10:37

I’ve got a squealer of a 4year old. More in excitement and zest for life type of way. I do bring him in for timeout and explain why he can’t be so loud BUT it makes barely any difference after he’s been back out for 10 minutes. He’s loud in nature and I honestly don’t think he realises that he’s squealing. For me it’s lovely to listen to them enjoying themselves but I know the neighbours probably don’t feel the same. I do what I can but I certainly won’t be stopping them playing outside because of it x

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jellybe · 27/05/2020 12:01

It's tricky. But unless my three sound like they are being murdered I don't quiet them down. They haven't left the house for more then a walk, haven't seen their friends or extended family other than on FaceTime for months, had birthdays in lockdown etc. So I'm not going to begrudge them having fun and making noise.

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Pleasenodont · 27/05/2020 12:03

No, you just have to deal with it and thank yourself lucky you don’t have neighbours who blare crap music or drill and hammer all day long. Could always be worse.

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Pleasenodont · 27/05/2020 12:04

Should also sympathise a little with the fact parents have been stuck indoors with their children for months now.

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Sargass0 · 27/05/2020 12:08

Water cannon? Taser? Tolerance?

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PanicOnTheStreets85 · 27/05/2020 12:08

Next doors' children are very noisy. I have a pair of ear defenders that I pop on when I'm working. Problem solved.

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moveandmove · 27/05/2020 12:10

I just had to go and shut all the windows and doors as my neighbours child was screaming and crying for ages. I'm working from home and was in an important meeting. I couldn't hear anything and whenever I came off mute all they could hear was neighbours child.
Shutting all the windows and doors still hasn't got rid of the sound but it's a little quieter.

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sassbott · 27/05/2020 12:28

I always look at threads like this a little Hmm.

If you have little to no tolerance for noise from neighbours (including children) then buy a house in the middle of nowhere. My children (along with many others) have not been anywhere. I’ve dragged out as much old garden play equipment I can find to keep them entertained and in this weather they’ve been in the garden for 6-8 hours a day.

It’s preferable to them being glued to devices. Or dragging them to packed beaches don’t you think? I try and make them aware that we have neighbour and to be mindful but my youngest can be shouting within minutes.

For all the people on here moaning relentlessly on threads like this. I wish a lockdown on all of you with children. No one is having an easy time of it.

Is there anything you can do about it? Yes. Move.

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LGY1 · 27/05/2020 12:32

This is a hard one but I am conscious of our neighbours and try to keep my little boy quiet
E.g yesterday he wanted to play in the garden at 6am. I managed to distract him until 7:30 (which doesn’t seem early once you have been up a couple of hours!!)
He was then very excited by the tadpoles in the garden. Every sentence started at a million decibels but every time I said “quieter” or spoke to him in a whisper.
Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t, but the point is I tried!
It think this is more about the adults than the children

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sluj · 27/05/2020 12:37

We have the same, 3 little screeches in one garden 4 doors away. Not helped by the recent decision to play Disney music in the garden too.
At the end of the day, I am just going to suck it up as its not worth souring relationships over. However I do think the parents should intervene more and at least stop playing the music. I am stuck indoors with the windows closed trying to work from home. 6 - 8 hours per day of screaming is a lot.

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MrsPear · 27/05/2020 12:39

Please pray tell what are you to do with children? I’ll tell you what op how about your neighbour gives them a beating to shut them up? Or perhaps she should put them in their rooms separately with iPads?

I seriously doubt the children are making any ‘bad’ noise you are intolerant.

God forbid children are allowed to be children.

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Popfan · 27/05/2020 12:39

I have little children neighbours on both sides, they are loud. I don't mind at all - the little boy and the tadpoles sounds adorable!!

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Laaalaaaa · 27/05/2020 12:39

Buy a new house - simple.

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MatildaTheCat · 27/05/2020 12:43

In this situation recently we talked to our neighbours. They have made an effort to keep the shouting down and keep noisy play to shorter periods of time (say an hour or so).

We were super clear that we appreciated how hard it was, that we didn’t want to stop them using their garden or having fun but we’re finding the constant shouting really hard to deal with. Luckily they’ve taken it in the spirit in which it was intended and we are all on civil terms.

Often I think parents get so used to the noise they barely notice it.

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dontdisturbmenow · 27/05/2020 12:44

@sassbott, I really hate parents like you. Your kids are not the centre of the world and if you can't control them so that they can play nicely without screaming, shouting, crying and winging, then YOU are the problem as the parent.

And yes , I had young children, and yes, I taught them that the garden was not a communal area and yes, they learn without hardship to enjoy themselves without boisterous behaviour.

I have neighbours on each side with 7 kids all together who would probably say the same as you. It's been obvious over the years that they re overwhelmed with their kids yet continued to have more despite the houses being 2 and 3 bedrooms. It's obvious they send their kids in the garden to get rid of them and they don't care for what they do there, as a matter they probably hope they let it all out so they are calmer when they come back in. The parents are never out.

It's a nightmare but like you, they couldn't care less. They feel hard done by but they chose to have more children than they can cope with. Why should others pay for it? Complete self-centered attitude.

OP, there us little you can do although we tell the kids to be quiet assertively when it gets too bad. Finally, they tend to listen until the next time.

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OchonAgusOchonO · 27/05/2020 12:46

@LGY1 - I managed to distract him until 7:30 (which doesn’t seem early once you have been up a couple of hours!!)

That was horrendously inconsiderate of you. I'm sure it seemed early to your neighbours who hadn't been up for hours.

Every sentence started at a million decibels but every time I said “quieter” or spoke to him in a whisper. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn’t, but the point is I tried!

Yes, trying is better than not trying, but at 7.30am the only acceptable parental reaction to a child repeatedly yelling in the garden is to take him/her indoors until a more reasonable time of the day.

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OchonAgusOchonO · 27/05/2020 12:50

Often I think parents get so used to the noise they barely notice it.

I agree completely. Now my kids are older, I find the noise registers more than when mine were younger. Like you, I made sure that my dc understood they needed to consider other people too.One of them was naturally loud so he took a lot more effort but it worked with repetition.

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BrokenBrit · 27/05/2020 12:53

I agree it’s really hard. We have a generally quiet street and lots of elderly but a few houses have young children and it’s a difficult time all being cooped up so much. Most people are trying to be considerate and do their best and of course it’s good for children to have some outside time and play.

However one family lets their little ones scream, and I mean scream, outside in the street for hours every day. The youngest is only 3 and I think it’s too much for them being left alone for such lengths of time with the parents just watching out of the window/ open door. I do empathise with the parents who are probably trying to work from home but they really do need to make some steps to entertain the little ones not just have them shouting in the street for hours every day.
Yesterday we had one of them banging a pan in the middle of the street and it’s just too much tbh and they are riding scooters fast onto elderly people who are trying to socially distance. Their parents should be more responsible, but they have been having parties during lockdown so clearly don’t really give a shit. Their house is for sale so am eagerly awaiting them to move!!

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Jjttmm · 27/05/2020 12:54

7.30 Shock I’m not even up then some days. I tend not to let my toddler in the garden until 10.30/11. My neighbours tend to potter about from about 9 and I like to give them a few hours of peace. To be honest he is pretty quiet playing but still like to be considerate in case he’s having a noisy moment

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Cherrysoup · 27/05/2020 12:54

I’d go round. I did! I don’t think constant screaming is on. Kids playing is gorgeous, screaming is not.

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Scoobydoobywho · 27/05/2020 12:54

A neighbour a couple of houses down are very noisy at the best of times times. Added to the fact that they are also having other kids round to play in the pool or on the trampoline. I did have to go round one evening about nine o'clock to ask if they could keep the noise (screaming) down a bit as it was keeping our oldest from going to sleep.

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Ilovemyshoppingtrolley · 27/05/2020 12:55

I feel your pain, neighbours on one side have children who are out from 7am to 7pm in their garden. The noise is horrendous and they keep throwing things over the fence, at first I returned said items but they just keep on coming so now I just bag items up. No one has come round to pick them up.
Then on the other side of me the neighbours smoke weed, It is awful. I hate the smell and wafts into my house.

Unfortunately I am stuck at home at the moment due to shielding so can't escape.

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