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AIBU?

Irritating noise from neighbours

17 replies

31133004Taff · 26/05/2020 18:38

IABU - ignore. It’s minor. Things could be so much worse.
IANBU to resolve, and here’s my experience of resolving a similar problem.

Neighbour’s alarm goes off at 5am everyday. Regularly doesn’t turn it off so it vibrates/buzzes for an hour before automatically turning off. The noise vibrates through my wall waking and keeping me awake. I spoke to them a couple of months ago, and the alarm was turned off. They have now reverted back to leaving the alarm buzzing/vibrating.

They may be irritated with me. They park across my drive regularly and so regularly have to ask them to move. I know it’s a traffic offence to do this but don’t want to exasperate a easily managed problem.

I would really appreciate suggestions on how I can address their low level CFery amicably.

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Am I being unreasonable?

63 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
5%
You are NOT being unreasonable
95%
makingmammaries · 26/05/2020 18:41

I’d go the PA route. Set alarm to ring for an hour at 10pm and leave dustbin on road in front of drive.

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ChikiTIKI · 26/05/2020 18:43

Knock on their door at about 5.20am and ask them to turn it off, every time.

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Eckhart · 26/05/2020 18:46

What was their attitude like when you spoke to them? Were they amenable and have simply forgotten, or were they grudging and can't be bothered anymore?

Why the hell do THEY want their alarm ringing at 5am for an hour, anyway? This would drive me demented.

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Abitofalark · 26/05/2020 19:07

Yes, they are probably annoyed at being asked to move the car and it's become a bit of tit for tat. I take it you don't want to wear ear plugs, something I used to do. I've also used the 'every time' request.

Is there anything else you can do to stop the noise penetrating? Wall insulation or heavy furniture to dampen the effect, such as putting a bookcase full of books, or a wardrobe or built-in cupboards along the relevant wall? And a large built-in padded headboard?

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31133004Taff · 26/05/2020 19:55

@Eckhart - he is always amenable. She seems to be more defensive/belligerent when spoken to. She’s a shift worker. God knows how he’s sleeping through the alarm. Maybe they have separate sleep arrangements. I think they’re quite immature. They resolve their parking problem by creating a problem with me. Maybe I should point that out!

I have warned them that I am called out in the night when my Dad falls out of bed. I have no hesitation in knocking in the door at 2am if they continue to block the drive.

The alarm is more problematic. They are merely being thoughtless. I think I need to bide my time until there is a natural opportunity to talk them. I can point out what I avoid doing not to irritate them. Suggest what I could become slack on.

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Eckhart · 26/05/2020 20:08

How valuable is the parking situation to them? You need to use that as a tool to manipulate them. And also you need to not let them think you're angry with them. They need to think you're really suffering, and that they can help you by doing this one small thing (TURN THE FECKING ALARM OFF!!!)

If you can get them to agree again to turn the thing off, and then say 'Oh, that's so kind, would you like to use my parking space?', that'll hold them to it, ongoing.

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JayAlfredPrufrock · 26/05/2020 20:13

I’d bang on the wall with a sledge hammer or pop round to their front door in my jammies.

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coldlighthappier · 26/05/2020 20:20

Bang the wall repeatedly until they turn off the alarm. Keep going. Or set your own alarm for 3.30am and bang the wall then to wake them up early. You will still lose sleep that way though 😂

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31133004Taff · 26/05/2020 21:09

Am I being a wuss in not wanting to do the most obvious thing - bang on the wall as a message their behaviour is waking me? You can sometimes be polite aka ‘wet’?

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Eckhart · 26/05/2020 21:12

Not wuss, but it's not the most productive way. You need them on side.

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31133004Taff · 26/05/2020 21:23

@Eckhart - thanks.

Re parking space. If I suggest it is shared I suspect I would be creating a problem for myself rather than them resolving their parking problem.

I feel better having a chance to mull it over. I’m going to use earplugs until there is an opportunity to speak to them without needing to knock on the door again. I want to avoid that. I feel I’m already on the back foot doing that.

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31133004Taff · 26/05/2020 21:25

From the votes, I’m not unreasonable to address. Don’t need to just get on with it.

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Whatnametomorrow10 · 26/05/2020 21:28

I feel for you about the alarm we had neighbours that did that - drove us mad as it was every weekend . But i would lie awake dreading the noise..
Husband eventually knocked on the door at 6 in the morning - they obviously didn’t answer but they had a ring camera and later that evening came over. Apparently they didn’t realise and had gone away for the weekend & has been for the past few weekends and hadn’t realised it was even on. But all sorted amicably eventually!

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Eckhart · 26/05/2020 21:33

It's not ok legally to make noise that might disturb others except between 7am and... I think 11pm? Definitely tackle it. Somehow.

I don't know what to do about my incredibly loud-snoring downstairs neighbour. I can hear him loud enough to wake me everywhere in my flat. I know that removing his eyes with a spoon isn't the answer, but... Well, anyway, good luck, OP!

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MitziK · 26/05/2020 21:41

Her belligerence is probably something to do with the time the alarm has to go off, especially if her DP keeps her awake/wakes her up by still clattering around when she's trying to go to sleep. Or you do in the evenings through still being up after 9pm.

A daylight alarm makes me far less likely to sleep through a loud one (and I have slept through some absolutely horrendous alarms on many occasions). And, purely by luck, the NDN moved their big bedroom TV away from the dividing wall, so I wasn't kept awake by them watching it at night anymore.

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Warpdrive · 26/05/2020 21:45

I think that you do need to speak to them face to face.

There's a possibility that they are being passive aggressive, rather than just ignorant, with their alarm. These types of people dont have it in them to deal with confrontation so use that to your advantage.

It doesn't have to be aggressive though. It could be something along the lines of, "Hi NDN. I'm really glad I've seen you, I've been wanting to bump into you to check of everything is ok and ask you a favour - when you used to switch off your 5am alarm it was brilliant for me, but I'm not sure if it is ringing while you're in the shower or something but it keeps ringing and its disturbing my sleep again. Any chance you could go back to what you used to do?"

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31133004Taff · 26/05/2020 22:22

@Eckhart. - know that removing his eyes with a spoon isn't the answer, but... knew I’d get a laugh out of MN. Sorry that you have snoring. Awful.

@Warpath - thanks.

@MitziK - tv on shared wall. OMG. That’s a nightmare. At least I can get to sleep.

Thanks all. Your comments have helped me get some perspective.

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