Advanced search

To wonder why some people are so inconsiderate?

(20 Posts)
Magicra84 Mon 25-May-20 12:41:59

I posted a few weeks ago about NDN who since lockdown was playing his dance music all day everyday which has a heavy bass. One day he had bee playing it for five hours straight. He was playing it in the garden from the house that day so I couldn't escape into the garden. That same day after he got in past 11pm and put the music on as I was winding down for bed, I text him nicely asking him to turn the bass down. We get on well and he was very apologetic and the next morning too.

It's been pretty quiet since then. I can hear his music but without bass thumping through my walls. He's also very noisy banging about the house but I don't so much mind normal life noise.

So today the sun is out again, he's out enjoying the sun and he has his music playing in the garden, lower than usual but the bass is back and even with my TV turned up I can still hear it. It's really shitty dance music so I can't escape to the garden again. Ffs. He's a selfish dickhead. I'm always really considerate of not making noise. Aibu to say rather than project his shitty musical tastes onto neighbours even those who want to be in their gardens today he should invest in some good headphones? I slammed the kitchen window shut which backs on to the gardens but it had no effect. I'm really battling with my mental health at the moment so this is probably making it worse but I'm sick of selfish people.

OP’s posts: |
Magicra84 Mon 25-May-20 12:42:54

It makes me so anxious my heart beat literally races.

OP’s posts: |
heartsonacake Mon 25-May-20 12:43:48

YABU. He’s enjoying music in his garden in the middle of the day. I don’t see the issue.

I’m sure he thinks your music is “shitty” too.

heartsonacake Mon 25-May-20 12:44:22

It makes me so anxious my heart beat literally races.

Right, but with all due respect, that is not your neighbours problem to deal with. It’s yours.

BruceAndNosh Mon 25-May-20 12:45:44

Music does not need to be loud to be enjoyed.


IckyIsAFuckingStupidWord Mon 25-May-20 12:46:55

We get on well

He's a selfish dickhead

You need to decide which of these is applicable!

LillianBland Mon 25-May-20 12:48:32

I don’t blame you for being pissed off and I’m sorry if your mental health is suffering. It’s the base that I would find so irritating. You’ll either have to ask him to turn the base down or learn to put up with it. I’m sure you’re not the only neighbour he’s pissing off, si you might be able to get them to speak to him too.

LillianBland Mon 25-May-20 12:50:35

We get on well

He's a selfish dickhead

You need to decide which of these is applicable!

Both can be true. He may be a nice person but thoughtless, regarding his music. He may not realise how far the music travels.

Alb1 Mon 25-May-20 12:52:42

I think YABU, sorry you’re mental health is struggling, it’s a really difficult time even without mental health troubles so I understand why YABU. But he’s compromised and you need to as well, it’s just part of having neighbours, annoying as it is. And you risk making things difficult to if you mention it again and less understanding this time.

Shamoo Mon 25-May-20 12:53:54

Totally disagree with the people who say it’s his garden and he can do what he wants. That is such a selfish attitude. I couldn’t live next door to somebody like that OP, I totally feel your pain. Very occasionally may be ok, but to do this often is totally selfish and makes him a prick.

Topsy44 Mon 25-May-20 12:55:47

YANBU and I think a sunny BH unfortunately brings out idiots! I can sympathise with you - whenever its sunny, the people in the flats behind me, sit out on their balconies, talk loudly, play loud music, teenagers muck about in the alley behind me and my neighbour decides to do all manner of banging and some sort of axel grinding.

That particular base dance music is also highly irritating. I totally get where you're coming from. I wouldn't dream of playing loud base music out of my garden because I know it would irritate my neighbours.

You shouldn't have to but can you go out for a walk somewhere for a bit just to escape the irritation. I often find a break away even if for an hour helps.

WitchyMoo Mon 25-May-20 12:57:16

To be honest I couldn't get worked up too much about it
It's the middle of the day it doesn't sound as though it's particularly loud it sounds like there's a bass issue , perhaps it's the equipment and he can't help it .
11pm though I would get worked up

tryingtocatchthewind Mon 25-May-20 12:58:37

Go in the garden and put some music on yourself. He’ll soon work out how shit it is

LivingThatLockdownLife Mon 25-May-20 12:58:46

Ask him nicely to turn the base down.

Only an arse would refuse that and you hope he is reasonable since he responded well to the last time you asked him.

We had same, once they turned the base down they could have their music go quite loud and actually we couldn't hear it.

LillianBland Mon 25-May-20 12:59:03

So my boys can play raimstein, in my garden and my neighbours can’t complain, if they’re offended? After all, it’s my garden and the boys are fed up too.

Clancey Mon 25-May-20 13:15:24

OP, he probably thinks he’s entertaining everyone. You can either nip round & tell him straight, or just let it go & play some death metal whenever you think he’s having a quiet moment. The only way to deal with noise is to make more noise. Go out for a walk if you don’t fancy listening to it yourself, walking’s good for MH.

Fedupwiththemedia Mon 25-May-20 13:17:12

YANBU despite why others say

That would totally piss me off.

MadameMarie Mon 25-May-20 13:18:05

YANBU people should be more considerate of others

CourtneyLurve Mon 25-May-20 13:23:27

YANBU. That's what headphones are for. It's selfish to impose your noise on other people. And I absolutely get the anxiety thing. Not being able to relax in your own home is debilitating.

pumpkinbump Mon 25-May-20 13:32:49

I've never understood the need for people to listen to music loud enough so everyone else can hear. It's very rude. Sometimes I can hear music from various gardens but it's not blasting and can easily be drowned out. Dance music is the worst.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »