Some background...good friend of 8+yrs, our DD's (age 7) go to same school. My dd was alway confident, hers shy and clingy at school.
During Nursery and Kindergarten it was made my dds 'job' to support her DD (who we will call child b), which I thought was fine as they were best friends. Get to reception and her dd dumps my dd for child c. My dd is left friendless and alone as all other friendships/groups have been formed. Is included sometimes and then ruthlessly excluded, leaving her uncertain and sad - triangle friendships never work.
DD is then bullied horribly (school were useless, but I'd just given birth to a severely ill SN DS so didn't really have my eye on the ball so let it pass)for 2 years. She started sleepwalking, crying at bedtime, not wanting to go to school and her congidence has been horribly affected.
DD still wants to be best friends with child b, but child b wants to be pals with c. She once said to me, having been upset over some exclusion that went on, "perhaps I'm not the sort of person that ever has any friends mummy"
So I found out that ENB were coming to a local theatre to do a children's performance. I call up my friend and ask if her DD wants to come too, "no we are going with child c" So I asked if I go to the same performance can they have tea together at a local well known noodle bar "yes". I thought this would be better than nothing for my dd to spend time with child b.
So DD is happy that we are going, then having tea with child b and c after. Then today friend calls to say tea is off.
I am upset on many levels, I feel that she is not being very considerate as my dd hardly ever gets to go to this kind of thing my dh works abroad and ds has sn so I can't take him and have no-one I can leave him with. My friend is well aware that my dd has missed out before due to her taking child c and my dd being the only one in class not to go.
Should I mention to my friend that this will upset my dd or just tell her its fine.
I wish my DD had a 'thicker skin' and was more able to deal better with being left out, it hurts me to see her so upset. I will try to resell this to her as a special girly treat out for just the two of us.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
to be miffed with a friend for excluding my dd?
12 replies
alycat · 20/09/2007 14:19
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.