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Do I say something? I don't think neighbour should be driving.

(96 Posts)
99ProblemsPlus1 Thu 21-May-20 19:36:41

Elderly neighbour is in their 80s.

Their driving has become quite erratic recently and for the past couple of months they have been parking on our road with half the car on the pavement and half sticking out in the road and also hitting others cars when parking.

Just today I pulled up and was sat in my car about to get out as they pulled into the space behind me and hit my car as they were parking. They didn't notice and I had to ask them if they could move back as their bumper was touching the back of my car (and had jolted me slightly forward). Fortunately there is no damage but this has happened a few times now and to a few other cars on the street, DHs being one of them a couple of weeks ago.

I feel bad, I don't like to say anything but it's getting to the point where someone's car is going to get damaged and frankly I worry about them driving on the roads from what I've seen.

What do I do?

HoneyWheeler Thu 21-May-20 19:39:30

I would absolutely write in confidence to the DVLA. It seems harsh, but what if your bumper had been a toddler? I think you would regret not saying something if the worst were to happen. You're concerned for their welfare as much as anyone else's!

Raybay Thu 21-May-20 19:40:53

Can you contact their family members? It could be a child they hit next. Someone needs to speak up, perhaps try neighbourhood police officer?

Bienentrinkwasser Thu 21-May-20 19:41:36

Hmm we’re in a similar position. Elderly neighbour in her (LATE!!) 90s still driving and not doing it all that well. We live rurally and she’d be totally isolated without her car so we have no choice but to turn a blind eye to it really. There’s an unspoken rule that we leave an extra half car space either side of her car.

AlwaysCheddar Thu 21-May-20 19:51:43

Call dvla before they hit a person.

bloodywhitecat Thu 21-May-20 19:54:12

I would, we had to report my grandmother as she refused to give up her licence. It is harsh but the next time it could be a human they hit and seriously injure, or worse.

Raaaa Thu 21-May-20 19:58:39

My uncle took my licence off my gran as he drove past her on a country road and she didn't see him and was going down the middle of the road. He was in a pick up truck so could mount the verge to avoid her. She accepted it aswell. Sometimes they have to stop for everyone's sake.

Nikhedonia Thu 21-May-20 20:09:37

Sadly, I would report. It's just not worth the risk.

GinDaddyRedux Thu 21-May-20 20:11:48

Definitely should be reported - today it's a bumper, next time it could be a person

mencken Thu 21-May-20 20:24:39

in the hope that DVLA might actually do something... a car is a lethal weapon in hands like this.

mnahmnah Thu 21-May-20 20:25:05

I would report it. In case next they will be going the wrong way round a roundabout or down a motorway. Or mount a pavement and hit someone. If that happened and I hadn’t done anything I would feel terrible guilt

Elieza Thu 21-May-20 20:28:10

Does the old one usually drive or is it just now as it’s lockdown as they don’t have friends or internet and need to shop (aren’t aware of help available)?

I totally agree that perhaps the police is the way to go. You have witnessed damage being caused. That’s a police matter. They could perhaps talk to her about what help is available re shopping as she may be supposed to stay at home.

2bazookas Thu 21-May-20 20:33:53

Don't wait until they hit a pedestrian or cause a serious crash

call your local police, give them the registration number, and the drivers age name and address if you know it.

FeelinFagin Thu 21-May-20 20:41:50

Please please contact the DVLA. I would also strongly recommend getting front and rear dash cams too. Mine works when my car is turned off as well as running. Parking mode keeps my car monitored all the time. If your neighbour does end up damaging your car you really do need proof or he could just deny deny deny. Dash cams are worth their weight in gold in the event of an accident, neighbour related or not.

U022828 Thu 21-May-20 20:46:27

Please report - I know someone who's mum was killed by an elderly driver and it was just horrific for everyone involved, obviously.

Elsiebear90 Thu 21-May-20 20:49:13

Do it, my friend had a neighbour like this, no one reported him, one day she was in the house and heard a huge bang and he’s driven into their living room wall. If someone had been sitting in the chair by the bay window they would have been seriously injured if not killed as half the car was in the living room. He said he got the gears confused and then the peddles.

FeelinFagin Thu 21-May-20 20:50:09

*CCTV footage shows Heagren, who was 86 at the time of the fatal collision, looking angry when he crashed into a bollard after attempting to move the vehicle.
He got back into the automatic car and reversed it at maximum reverse speed, narrowly missing a dad who had to pull his children out of harm’s way.
Heagren continued until his car hit Ms Newman and Ms Taylor, carrying them towards a bollard, which stopped the Ford after it had travelled 100ft.*

He should have been stopped too.

TheSmelliestHouse Thu 21-May-20 20:52:30

Let your local police know. They'll keep an eye out for them and pull them over.

Idododoidadada Thu 21-May-20 20:54:55

Report to the DVLA and inform local police. Shocking.

WhatWouldChristineCagneyDo Thu 21-May-20 20:55:13

You need to report it. A very elderly driver that I know had been refusing to give up their license and had a terrible accident a few months ago. Hit a parked car and flipped their own vehicle onto it's roof. It's a miracle they weren't more seriously injured and thankfully nobody else was hurt.

cheeseislife8 Thu 21-May-20 20:59:17

I think you do need to report this, for their own safety and that of everyone else

Spied Thu 21-May-20 21:00:17

You really must report.
It's the kindest thing to do. They could easily kill someone else or indeed themselves.
Then you would have to live with the guilt of not doing something about it.

Mansmansmum Thu 21-May-20 21:01:45

I'm afraid DVLA will do fuck all unless you can provide the driving licence number.

A very elderly and clearly confused woman reversed into me twice when I was parked. The police told me to report it to DVLA but despite giving DVLA her name, address and licence plate they insisted they could do nothing at all unless I could provide her driving licence number which of course I didn't have.

Inthepurplerain Thu 21-May-20 21:02:16

Wow I can’t believe the person above saying they keep a blind eye about it.
They could kill someone ffs.

Please report in confidence to the DVLA.

Inthepurplerain Thu 21-May-20 21:02:49

Or to the police

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