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To think if you lend something to someone...

(38 Posts)
smoodgy Wed 20-May-20 19:33:12

About 2 years ago, my partner was lent something for a baby by someone at his work (in a school).

The item costs about £20. We didn’t use it, but stored it. Upon his return to work he forgot about it and didn’t return the item, which the lady didn’t request back.

We’ve since moved house approximately two hours away from his work and therefore this lady’s house (he has a new job starting September).

The lady texted him today saying she needed the item back.

My partner responded that he can deliver it back to her in two weeks when he goes to work for the day.

She has requested he order her a new one from amazon as she needs it ASAP. I have said no, partner wants to keep the peace.

Who is being unreasonable?

OP’s posts: |
bridgetreilly Wed 20-May-20 19:35:30

She can wait. It could easily take 2 weeks for Amazon to deliver at this point, and she must realise that in the current circumstances she can't expect anyone to be doing 2 hour journeys like this.

KrisAkabusi Wed 20-May-20 19:35:31

You. You have her property and she needs it. For the sake of 20 quid, replace it if you can't get it to her.

recycledteenager24 Wed 20-May-20 19:35:35

i'd return the original depending on what it was.

LoudBatPerson Wed 20-May-20 19:37:10

Could not just send the item to her by post/courier?

highmarkingsnowbile Wed 20-May-20 19:37:13

I'd post her the original.

Ninkanink Wed 20-May-20 19:37:22

Post it to her.

Viviennemary Wed 20-May-20 19:37:52

She is. Tell her to collect it herself or wait two weeks. I wouldn't replace it. I might post the item.

Bibijayne Wed 20-May-20 19:40:28

Post it back. Problem solved.

WobblingMyWigglyBits Wed 20-May-20 19:40:31

I think you are
You should have returned it as soon as you realised you weren't going to use it 9

smoodgy Wed 20-May-20 19:43:46

Postage costs £12 and won’t be next day. She can wait 2 weeks.

OP’s posts: |
TheThingWithFeathers Wed 20-May-20 19:44:28

She is being unreasonable. Give her it back as soon as you can, or post it, but do not replace it. If she needs another one that badly she can buy it herself.

Ninkanink Wed 20-May-20 19:47:28

Ok yes, she can wait. Although he/you really should have remembered and returned it long ago.

BumpBundle Wed 20-May-20 19:49:33

YABU - so is she.
1. You should have returned it as soon as you realised that you didn't need it. You don't keep things that people have let you borrow for years for no reason.
2. She can't expect you to just drop everything and break lockdown to return an item immediately that she's not needed for years. She also can't expect you to purchase her a brand new one because she can't wait.
You're both being unreasonable and it sounds like your OH is the only one trying to keep the peace. For the sake of his work relationships, just buy her a new one. It's not fair on him that your stubbornness creates an awkward situation for him. Equally, she wouldn't be invited for dinner anymore and wouldn't be getting a Christmas card after this ridiculousness.

HollowTalk Wed 20-May-20 19:56:11

Why can't you post it tomorrow?

gamerchick Wed 20-May-20 19:58:49

Is anyone else really curious to what it is?

Pukkatea Wed 20-May-20 20:00:26

Just get her a new one and stop being stubborn. People who lend you stuff are doing you a favour.

Tropical2 Wed 20-May-20 20:00:53

You - You should have returned the item when you no longer needed it, not stored it away. You certainly should have returned the item when you moved house, not took it with you.

I would send it via Courier (Hermes, DPD...) or order her a new one, whichever is cheaper.

UnfinishedSymphon Wed 20-May-20 20:06:49

A £20 item which you've had for 2 years and now she wants it back? What on earth is it? Definitely don't buy a new one, she's a bit odd for requesting something back out of the blue after so long but just give the original back...when you can

Linguaphile Wed 20-May-20 20:38:44

This happened to us once with a car seat. It was already knackered (tho had never been in an accident) from the lady’s previous three children, and I genuinely thought it was a ‘you can use what’s left of it’ gift as I doubt she’d have been able to sell it for even a tenner on her local FB group. We moved abroad a few months after the birth and took it with us for occasional use. Anyway, out of the blue nearly two years later, she very curtly messaged and (knowing we were living in another country) asked for it back. I was a bit gobsmacked, not least because by that time it was definitely due for replacement anyway with the safety lifespan... I didn’t want to cause a scene so ended up buying her a new one on Amazon. 🙄

Ohtherewearethen Wed 20-May-20 20:44:28

I voted YABU as I think it's very poor manners to keep something somebody has loaned you for so long. Why did you keep it if you had no use for it? When you packed up to move house you should have returned it. Just pay to post it to her or buy her a new one.

zscaler Wed 20-May-20 20:57:36

She can wait. After 2 years she can wait two weeks. Or if it’s that urgent, she can come and get it herself.

thebear1 Wed 20-May-20 21:00:53

She was kind enough to lend it to you, you haven't bothered to return it in 2 years and she now needs it. I think you should post it back, drop it off or buy a new one.

carlywurly Wed 20-May-20 21:06:51

Oh god, this is why I never borrow anything if I can help it. So many people try and foist stuff on you while you're pregnant too.

imsooverthisdrama Wed 20-May-20 21:09:24

Yeah I need to know what it is .
But tell her amazon delivery is 4 weeks so will be quicker to wait .

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