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to want to sleep with my friends husband

(114 Posts)
maximopark Wed 19-Sep-07 19:27:05

omg, married 10 years, 3 kids, but am falling in love with another man. i see him at school of all places, his son and mine are in the same class. i am friends with his wife but i think she suspects i fancy her husband. does this mean;
1) im a selfish tart
2) my marriage is not as happy as i thought it was
3) im going through some sort of midlife crisis.
please help, i cant stop thinking about him

Sheherazadethegoat Wed 19-Sep-07 19:28:10

1,2 and 3 actually only 1 if you act on it.

totaleclipse Wed 19-Sep-07 19:29:19

Dont know why you are feeling that way, but leave well alone, but am sure you know

RubyRioja Wed 19-Sep-07 19:29:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

harleyd Wed 19-Sep-07 19:30:32

its fine to want to
it would be unreasonable to do so though

toomanydaves Wed 19-Sep-07 19:30:53

Do you need us to tell you?

Nos 2 and 3 worth considering and looking at though.

brimfull Wed 19-Sep-07 19:31:36

all 3

you need a nice night out with your dh

maximopark Wed 19-Sep-07 19:33:14

i know its lust, but its never happened to me before. im actally scared of the effect hes having on me.

RubyRioja Wed 19-Sep-07 19:36:45

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bubblagirl Wed 19-Sep-07 19:37:55

omg what would you say if someone wanted your husband and she was your friend i tink you need to have time with your husband and get some excitement back it just means your spending your time fantasizing as it makes you feel good but get things back on track you wont need them thoughts anymore

Bluestocking Wed 19-Sep-07 19:39:35

For goodness' sake, it's a CRUSH, woman! Haven't you ever had one before? Enjoy it and wait for it to pass.

maximopark Wed 19-Sep-07 19:43:59

my husband is great, which is why i feel like i need advice. just wondered if this has happened to any of you. thought this "feeling" was well behind me.

BBBee Wed 19-Sep-07 19:46:12

is normal.

don't woory and FFS don;t do anything.

maximopark Wed 19-Sep-07 19:47:47

bluestocking; i hope your right, i feel like a bloody teenager. but omg i look at him and....WOW IM ADDICTED.

Hulababy Wed 19-Sep-07 19:48:28

Do not act upon it.

Find time to spend with your own DH, together.

Cappuccino Wed 19-Sep-07 19:48:45

yes is crush

I fancied a bloke I worked with a while back

made me quite insane for couple of weeks

then I woke up one morning and thought christ, he's disgusting, what on earth was going on there?

harleyd Wed 19-Sep-07 19:51:21

does he know?

Bluestocking Wed 19-Sep-07 19:51:53

I'm sure I'm right. I haven't had a crush for a while but I had a shocking one a few years ago on a colleague - the funny thing was that I knew he was gross even while I was lusting furiously after him. Do not under any circumstances do anything embarrassing!

NotQuiteCockney Wed 19-Sep-07 19:52:55

Hmmm, it can be interesting to see what it is about this other bloke that appeals so much? What does he have that your DH doesn't?

But yeah, nothing wrong with feeling this way, it's only wrong if you do anything about it!

ScottishMummy Wed 19-Sep-07 19:54:42

go for it - if you want to be an adulteress, split up 2 families, demonstrate that lust/boredom/wandering eye is worth indulging.A

alternatively have a word with yourself and dont be so stupid

finally change the sceanario gender about, make yourself the wronged party see how it feels

sort out points 2 and 3 independently and keep your knickers on whilst you do so

BarbieGirl Wed 19-Sep-07 19:58:07

I think it is natural to fancy other people but to act on anything is a bit different especially if there are kids involved.

expatinscotland Wed 19-Sep-07 20:01:54

You don't 'fall in love' with people. You choose to indulge in and act on feelings others elicit in you and you in them.

Fantasy is one thing.

Completely normal.

But when it crosses the boundaries of your imagination, enough that his wife appears to have noticed, then it's time to examine your feelings in greater perspective, NOT act on them.

grumpyfrumpy Wed 19-Sep-07 20:03:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Isababel Wed 19-Sep-07 20:04:37

I'm with Bluestocking, wait for the crush to pass (but hide it well in the mean time!)

Isababel Wed 19-Sep-07 20:05:21

Grumpyfrumpy... I was just waiting for MAdamez to come and suggest that grin

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