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A trivial one. I asked one thing of DH and hes gone to sleep.

(57 Posts)
Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 20:17:46

I'm at home with small children and DH works nights.

I do virtually all of the housework and the lions share of the childcare given that I'm the one at home and not asleep during the day. I cook for everybody, clean every day, do all of the washing and shopping.

He has two nights off (yesterday and tonight)

I asked him to do one thing in the home and that is to give the living room rug scrub whilst he's off. He said he'd do it last night but "forgot" (forgotten means couldn't wait to get on the xbox)

I then reminded him again today and he said he would do it once the children have gone to bed. He has now fallen asleep on the sofa as of 7.30 because he stayed up until 5 o clock this morning playing the sodding xbox. This annoys me because then he's useless the next afternoon.

He can go to sleep at night, despite his body clock being different. He could go to sleep at any time any place at the click of a finger. He's one of those people.

I will do it myself, but I have a bladder prolapse and uterine decent so it's not a cake walk crawling around on my hands and knees especially when there is an abled body man who lives here too.

We had an unrelated argument this afternoon as a result of him being snappy and rude so perhaps that is clouding my judgement on this one, but I'm quite pissed off.

I asked one thing of him. One thing.

AIBU?

OP’s posts: |
thegreenmachine Mon 18-May-20 20:20:22

No, you're not. You don't mind doing everything but ask him to go one thing and he can't or won't do it. Then you end up feeling full of resentment for doing everything!

LouiseTrees Mon 18-May-20 20:21:30

Wake him up by accidentally falling on him, Have the stuff ready to scrub. Say oh I’m so sorry I nearly pee’d myself there and had to grab the edge of the sofa to stop myself and fell onto you. Any chance you can help?

Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 20:27:11

The bowl, scrubbing brush and cleaning solution has been sat on the side for the past four hours whilst he has been dosing off to the soaps.

I prompted him twice "don't fall asleep, you said you were doing the carpet"

He still sits there giving into self inflicted tiredness.

I appreciate he works nights I really do, but I find staying up until 5am just to play games extremely selfish.

He could very easily go to bed around 12-1 on his nights off as evidenced when we were having technical difficulties with the broadband.

OP’s posts: |
Marlouse Mon 18-May-20 20:27:54

Do not do it yourself. It does not have to be done right now.
It will only show him that he can get away with ‘forgetting’ if he has to do the one chore.
You are not able to do it because of the prolapse so he will just have to man up and do this. It’s one chore FGS.
If I were you I would have woken him up already so he could do it.

Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 20:33:22

I've just realised a typo in my OP. I have uterine descent which is anything but decent grin

Yes good point. I won't do it myself.

OP’s posts: |
DamnYankee Mon 18-May-20 20:43:25

OP, glad your uterus is decent. Mine is being a little b*tch at the moment wink

What on Earth is it with grown men and the gaming? I get the appeal of an hour or two; however, it's all-nighters! If I've seen one thread on here about DuH's neglecting their share of the housework/childcare, I've seen a dozen.

Geesh! hmm

MrsTerryPratchett Mon 18-May-20 20:45:08

Don't do it.

Really don't.

Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 20:46:38

Ha oh how I wish it was still decent grin

Yes it is a massive PITA. It's his down time when he's not working, he says.

So bollocks to the rest of us at home then confused

OP’s posts: |
QuestionMarkNow Mon 18-May-20 20:46:59

Please dont do it. Don’t make yourself ill for a rug.

But remind him. Again and again. Because he is a twat and has no respect not care for you.

Suzie6789 Mon 18-May-20 20:50:03

Do not do it yourself! I presume it will cause you pain and discomfort? Can you wake him up, and ask him again? Do not move the soaps and cleaning stuff leave them out until he actually does his job.

Moooms Mon 18-May-20 20:54:12

Of course he should have done it, the whole narrative sounds very selfish imo.

My hubby does nights, and he makes a huge effort when he is here to be present, with the children, sharing the housework, cooking ect. I would be really upset if he came home and acted like he wasn't a part of the family, it sounds like your husband acts like a bachelor that just happens to live at your house, rather than being an active part of the family/household.

Wake him up and tell him, it's not on, clean the damn rug.

Ellie56 Mon 18-May-20 20:54:13

He is a lazy twat OP.

Can you sabotage the Wi-fi?

Babysharkdoodoodood Mon 18-May-20 20:59:18

Line up the cleaning stuff in front of the Xbox

Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 21:00:30

Thank you all for squashing the question as to whether I'm being an unreasonable nag!

It would cause me discomfort to do it myself yes, it also puts me at risk of the condition worsening. I was given strict instruction from the uro gynacologist to avoid heavy lifting, running, anything that puts strain on the abdomen and pelvic region etc. I also could, erm.. leak blush

I won't be doing it. I do enough, more than enough.

OP’s posts: |
Nottherealslimshady Mon 18-May-20 21:02:15

God I am so so glad my husband doesn't have a games console!
Sounds like your broadband needs a few weeks of being faulty .

Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 21:02:30

Some of these comments have raised a smile, thank you!

Not sure I could manage to sabotage the Wi-Fi to the extent where he'd be unable to rectify it.

It went down the other day (nothing to do with me) and he was glued to the Hub until it came on.

OP’s posts: |
HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend Mon 18-May-20 21:03:19

Hide the Xbox gable, if he moans... you want relaxing time... when is mine?

FlamingoAndJohn Mon 18-May-20 21:04:07

Don’t do it.
It doesn’t matter. It needs to be cleaned but no one will die for the want of a clean rug.
Leave it. Make sure he does it.

MitziK Mon 18-May-20 21:04:38

Not sure I could manage to sabotage the Wi-Fi to the extent where he'd be unable to rectify it

Unplug it and chuck the bastarding thing into the bucket of now cold, soapy water?

pussycatinboots Mon 18-May-20 21:04:46

Can you change the router name to "Cleanthefuckingrug" ?

Poppy146 Mon 18-May-20 21:11:11

Brilliant suggestions!

His gamer buddy has just called his phone to ask if he's playing and woke him up.

I'll be thrusting the cleaning equipment in his direction now

OP’s posts: |
Tappering Mon 18-May-20 21:13:41

It's his down time when he's not working, he says.

When's your downtime?

gah2teenagers Mon 18-May-20 21:15:29

Can you somehow invisibly disable it. Can’t stand this type of behaviour and then you can act all innocent when it doesn’t work.

Iloveplacentas Mon 18-May-20 21:28:16

Take his controllers and only give them back when he’s cleaned the rug

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