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Have you ever lived next door to someone much richer or poorer than you?

(108 Posts)
ColdcoffeeHotface Sat 16-May-20 00:18:44

As I posted on another thread, my neighbour had an extended rant at me today. He kept repeating that I was 'in a bubble' and didn't understand 'real life' and also that I 'flaunted my wealth.' We live in a house identical to his, my children have a second hand trampoline and swing set. We sometimes buy them toys for their birthday. I have a ten year old car.
But it made me think, is there anyway of not 'flaunting your wealth' or lack of it? People earn varying degrees of money, yet in many areas we all live side by side (especially in cities.) Can you really not show in any way that you have £500 more disposable income per month than your neighbours? And what would flashy look like? My relatives just bought a hot tub but I would be mortified to put it up in my area, especially after today, same with getting an Ocado delivery. Is this why people move to 'naice' areas?

OP’s posts: |
stopgap Sat 16-May-20 00:21:28

I lived in London for five years and NYC for eleven years, so have had more than my fair share of living adjacent to people much poorer or much wealthier than me.

Sadie789 Sat 16-May-20 00:23:11

Why are you even talking to a neighbour like that. Tell him to fuck off and mind his own business!

ColdcoffeeHotface Sat 16-May-20 00:24:40

@stopgap how does it work? Do people just accept that some have more? When you earn over a certain amount are you expected to move to a better neighbourhood?

OP’s posts: |
ErickBroch Sat 16-May-20 00:26:09

He sounds mad. How did this even come up? My neighbours have a lot more disposable income than us but that's because we just bought our house last year mid-20s and they are all in their 40s and bought their homes about 18 or so years ago. They have had time and money to do it all up. IDGAF.

MrsEricBana Sat 16-May-20 00:27:47

Yes I have. If they appear to have something I can't afford and would like I just think lucky them, wish I had one perhaps but never would l think they were "flaunting their wealth". Just ignore him, he's jealous I guess.

Pelleas Sat 16-May-20 00:28:39

I suspect I do now from what I have observed of my neighbours' possessions and lifestyle (with me being the poor one) grin. It really doesn't bother me in the slightest - I'm not trying to compete with them. I'd have no interest in, for example, their expensive cars, even if I could afford them.

ColdcoffeeHotface Sat 16-May-20 00:30:46

@Pelleas same. And I always said (prior to this incident) that if I won the lottery I'd still live in my current house as I knew it was the one when I set foot in it and I can't imagine loving a house more.

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Washyourhandsyoufilthyanimal Sat 16-May-20 10:18:28

Yeah move to a nicer neighbourhood one where neighbours don’t scream at you in the street

Waxonwaxoff0 Sat 16-May-20 10:26:41

My neighbours are a lot more well off than me. I live on a posh new build estate, big detached houses with 5 bedrooms. I live in the flat above the local takeaway. grin

Doesn't bother me to be honest. Never really give it a thought. But the neighbours don't know me as no one really knows there's a flat here. I'm moving soon to a street of 2 bedroom semis where the people will be in a similar earning bracket to me. Might get to know my neigbours a bit more there.

Xenia Sat 16-May-20 10:31:51

We are in outer London with a council estate very close so loads of people of all kinds mixing, never mind the borough being majority non-white. I don't think people fall out over it. One neighbour had 1000 people (yes 1000!!!) at his daughter's wedding in London - big Indian wedding. Some very rich people. Some like I am and many who aren't well off.

I have never had a neighbour making it out to be an issue however.

I don't think getting an Ocado delivery in my area is a sign of flaunting wealth. In fact in terms of English social status having expensive stuff is a big naff and common and new money surely? it is the lord of the manor who often looks like the gardener.

I just hope my house is not chosen for burglaries and I have a second hand car (rather than the Bentley the last owners used to have of my house - Pakistan oil millionaires I think they were or we were told - their off shore company owned the house before we bought it) and try to make sure my house would not be picked for a break in (and there is not much in it other than children if they did break in)

Warsawa31 Sat 16-May-20 10:33:37

He is being a entitled bell end. He lives in the house next to you not a tent on the road I presume ? Tell him to fo and speak to stop flaunting his wealth by living in a house, using his running clean water, eating three meals a day, accessing his high speed broadband etc etc when so many millions of people around Have pretty much nothing.

Thighdentitycrisis Sat 16-May-20 10:33:48

In middle of London in a mix of council, privately owned and privately rented street. We are all different and it’s part of city living. Nobody is flash or poverty stricken, and owners capital is tied up in their property I suppose

thegcatsmother Sat 16-May-20 10:36:21

My last NDN in Belgium was titled, had money, so didn't work, and had been gifted his house by his foamy. He was nice, smiled and said Hi when we saw him. He didn't impinge on us, neither did we on him.

thegcatsmother Sat 16-May-20 10:36:59

Family, not foamy. We need an edit function!!

unlimiteddilutingjuice Sat 16-May-20 10:39:41

I'm pretty well off for my area. No one has made an issue of it.
Your neighbour sounds unhinged.
I don't want to worry you but perhaps you should start noting these incidents down in case the behaviour escalates.

Belledan1 Sat 16-May-20 10:44:46

My house doesn't look as nice as the one attached to me but they are lucky as nearly all their parents on both sides are in plumbing electrician and window trade decorators (step parents incl) so if they need anything doing they just call them. The stepmom does their garden for them each week. Have the kids loads. They tell people how they like their house just so and all new but they are lucky get help. Supppse I am a bit jealous!

whogivesascoob Sat 16-May-20 10:44:45

I live in rural Ireland, where houses around me vary in size from traditional Irish 2 bed cottages to fancy new builds with 4/5 bedrooms/bespoke kitchen and larders etc....HOWEVER the size of these houses has no link whatsoever to the earning potential of their occupants...for example

Small 2 bed cottage which has been updated/renovated and is so cute is owned by a couple of doctors...with one dc

Large house next door with 4 beds,great spec kitchen, utility, larder...all the mod cons etc etc owned by the local postman and his wife who works part time in retail, they have 2 dc.

Other house across the road...gorgeous new build architectural designed with big landscape windows and cedar cladding... with 4 bedrooms, high spec kitchen and a hot tub out the back...a primary school teacher and an electrician.( with 4 dc )

NamedyChangedy Sat 16-May-20 10:48:29

I don't understand how you would even know. I have no idea what my neighbours' finances are, it's not something that we discuss. And even if someone drove up with a very expensive looking car, they could have been given it or taken out a loan. Doesn't really mean anything, does it?

jomaIone Sat 16-May-20 10:50:24

You sometimes buy toys for your kids for their birthday?? Wtf does that even mean???

We live on the biggest house in our street, most of the others are 2 bed terrace but ours is end terrace and been extended extensively. Next door is rented to a single man with kids EOW. Can't really say it's made much difference to ours or his life. We barely speak. I don't really get people who are too involved with neighbours that aren't friends.

The only issue is parking as we have a 2 car driveway and when there was issues with disabled parking spaces we had a snarky comment that it wouldn't bother us as we have a drive driveway 🤷‍♀️

AvoidingRealHumans Sat 16-May-20 10:51:18

We are on a new build estate and having never thought about it before reading your thread, I would say that the family in the house directly opposite me have a lot more money than me.
They have 2 lovely new expensive cars, a detached 5 bedroom house, go on amazing holidays I can only dream of etc but I have never thought about it. They seem lovely and I can't imagine them thinking bad of or judging me for being in a less favorable position finances wise.

I wouldn't dream of saying to them what your neighbour has said to you, it wouldn't cross my mind. I don't notice things like that, I would notice if they were arseholes or inconsiderate neighbours but I wouldn't link that to their wealth.

Peonyinbloom Sat 16-May-20 10:52:13

Conversation I had with my mum the other day
Mum While the neighbours are away I might get you to trim the tree a bit
Me Where are the neighbours?
Mum Staying in one of their hotels
Me WTF?grin
They are worth hundreds of millions.
( To be clear, its only a bit of thinning out, it really blocks the light in mums house and she is always asking them to trim it and they get the gardener to do it, but they are away so much she cant always ask them. Pretty sure they don't mind her doing it. )

checkingforballoons Sat 16-May-20 10:53:02

I don’t think I’d realise either way! I live in a town in Surrey that makes people go ‘Oooh, get you!’ when they hear the name of it but it’s a total mix of incomes. I know people who depend on the food bank and people with swimming pools. It’s a bit bloody weird actually. Now wondering if I confuse the neighbours by using both Aldi and Ocado 😁

anothernamechangeagain Sat 16-May-20 10:55:46

I wouldn't have a clue how much money my neighbours had or didn't have.

How on earth did that conversation even come about with your neighbour?

zscaler Sat 16-May-20 10:57:53

My parents live in a very large house in the countryside, with 3 little cottages in the vicinity which are much smaller / less fancy (the cottages used to be stables / servant cottages in the olden days, long before they were converted into private residences).

It doesn’t seem to have caused any friction for them. They get on well with all their neighbours - not best pals, but perfectly friendly and warm.

I think your neighbour is just a massive arsehole tbh. His comments were incredibly rude and intrusive.

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