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To ask if you like your siblings

(302 Posts)
User5672 Thu 14-May-20 22:19:35

Me and my sibling were close when children but now don’t really get on.

OP’s posts: |
pallasathena Thu 14-May-20 22:23:30

We used to get on...but life intervened and she became controlling, judgemental and difficult to be around and so I reduced contact.
Still in contact but only on a need to know basis and birthdays/Christmas.
It works for me.

YesItsMeIDontCare Thu 14-May-20 22:23:45

Opposite way round for me.

Love my brother to bits now, don't see each other very often due to busy lives but would drop everything and race to help if necessary.

Absolutely despised each other when we were kids though.

AnneLovesGilbert Thu 14-May-20 22:23:46

Adore them all. One of my brothers irritates me like no one else on the planet but I love him to pieces. My sister is one of the most accomplished, brilliant, beautiful people in the world, I miss her so much.

BillieEilish Thu 14-May-20 22:25:12

Really dislike them.

zscaler Thu 14-May-20 22:25:48

Absolutely adore them - and luckily adore their spouses too. There is no one I would rather be hanging out with than them, they’re my best friends (even though we now don’t live very close to each other and don’t see each other anything like as much as I wish we could).

JustStayHome Thu 14-May-20 22:26:12

Not really.

But to have a relationship with my nieces and nephews, iv kinda got to talk to them....

olivesnutsandcheese Thu 14-May-20 22:26:31

I get on v well with one DSis and I like the other one but we are very different. That said, would drop everything for both of them without a moment's hesitation,
if they needed me

Holothane Thu 14-May-20 22:27:33

Never really got on we’re not close, gave up contact 13 years ago, no regrets.

VirginWestCoast Thu 14-May-20 22:29:28

Love them all, though have very different relationships with each of them.

Sparklingbrook Thu 14-May-20 22:30:44

I love DB to bits, we have such a laugh when we are together. He lives 2 hours away and I don't see him as much as I would like, and currently can't see him at all. sad

goodbyestranger Thu 14-May-20 22:31:49

Yes.

Notimeforaname Thu 14-May-20 22:33:18

My big Sister always hated me. Cursed the day I was born. Used me when it suited her but mostly put me down, made up stories about me.

For years I ran after her hoping she would like me....Wondered what was wrong with me. I even went to therapy to see why I was so annoying and unlovable hmm.

But I finally copped on after 20 years, she would hit me and torment me when we were alone, then start a smear campaign about me so parents wouldn't believe me. Been no contact for years now. Instigated by me.
I'm So much happier now.

unlimiteddilutingjuice Thu 14-May-20 22:34:25

Its tricky.

We connect on some levels and can have a real laugh.
But our politics have diverged a bit and some subjects are awkward.

Dsis also has some mental health struggles and I've had to accept that sometimes, through no particular fault of my own, my presence is triggering to her.

We're both getting better at navigating that gracefully though...Things are improving.

Mitsouko67 Thu 14-May-20 22:34:28

I have 5; I like 4 of them fine, one I am low contact with. I wish her well but I've had too many bad experiences with her so now I don't engage.

WeirdlyOdd Thu 14-May-20 22:34:43

They're great, and so are their DH/DWs. We all get on well.

EineReiseDurchDieZeit Thu 14-May-20 22:36:40

Love one.

Hate the other.

Just thinking about them makes me feel so angry.

Snake in human form

EineReiseDurchDieZeit Thu 14-May-20 22:38:48

I could have written your post word for word including smear campaign @notimeforanewname

RosesandIris Thu 14-May-20 22:39:14

I always had a lot of affection for my brother. He is a recluse and prefers contact by email or phone. Years can go by when I don’t hear from him. However I can talk to him when we do speak. My sister and I have a very fraught relationship. I don’t actually like her much if truth be told. She’s become very narcissistic and controlling, and is completely self interested. To be honest I would prefer not to see her at all, but we see each other once a year for a day or two and that’s enough. Surface conversation is enough or things become difficult.I never got on with her as a child at all.

Livelovebehappy Thu 14-May-20 22:42:05

Love them, but feel it’s all superficial and once our dm dies, the bond won’t be strong enough that we will keep in touch regularly, which is sad.

Want2beme Thu 14-May-20 22:45:20

I've got one sister. I don't really know who she is as a person. She's a closed shop to me. We didn't get along as youngsters. She didn't like me and wasn't nice to me, so growing up we weren't even friendly, never mind close. I was always scared of her, if I'm honest. We live in different countries now and only see each other a couple of times a year, which always feels very strained to me, as we've got nothing in common and don't have a bond. We spent time together when her children were growing up, but that was about them, not because my sister and I had any kind of relationship.

DamnYankee Thu 14-May-20 22:45:34

@YesItsMeIDontCare

That's me, too. We are total opposites and didn't really get along until I left for college

That reminds me - I should probably call him!

Userengage Thu 14-May-20 22:46:48

Love them all, my sister is my best friend though we couldn’t stand each other when we lived in my parents’ house.

Notimeforaname Thu 14-May-20 22:47:46

EineReiseDurchDieZeit I'm sorry you've had to live through that too. It's a horrible way to live within the family unit. Spent years trying to understand.

Im not keen on how the word narcissist is thrown around a lot, but I recently discovered a YouTube series by a "Dr Ramani"..... And she has given me so much insight into my life growing up and what makes siblings or people treat others like this.

MangoHat Thu 14-May-20 22:48:54

I was thinking about this today ... how nice it would be to have siblings whose company I enjoyed and whose partners I wanted to spend time with. My brother and I have always had an awkward relationship and once he married a woman who can’t bring herself to say more than 3 words to me and not many more to our parents, I decided to give up. I initiate contact about nieces / nephews birthdays etc and try to elicit some concern from him for our elderly parents. If I left it to him to get in touch we would never speak.

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