Okay so background, my partner and I were together for just over 4 years. Throughout this time there were various issues mainly down to my trust issues and him also being secretive. I had seen on his instagram account he was following a stripper, some ex’s, liking videos of females literally shaking their arses (twerking) and also in skimpy pj’s. This obviously descended into an argument, I forgave him and we compromised meaning he deleted the people that offended me.
Years later, he develops a crazy eye infection- his eyes were literally bleeding at times. We thought this was really random, but I didn’t question it because he works with the public so thought he caught it from them. Beforehand I had found a card in his pocket detailing a sexual health clinics number and a note saying that the patient should call back. I went to his work to confront him (which was probably wrong) and he denied everything, saying I could call them and it wouldn’t be for him it would be for his friend. He said if I call I can never question him on anything EVER again... So i left it.
The eye infection then comes and goes over the course of a month of so. He messages me saying we need to have a serious talk, so we go for a drive and a talk. He then says that he lied and the appointment was for him. When leaving work to get in his car he stepped on something, didn’t think anything of it but it was attached to his shoe, he peeled it off or whatever and it turned out to be a used condom. He didn’t wash his hands, eventually touched his face and it turns out he got 2 STD’s from this. I was heartbroken understandably because he lied and gaslighted me- i still forgave him.
A few weeks ago, I was looking on google history (yes I was snooping) and I saw that he had used dating sites POF, tinder etc. I confronted him and showed the evidence- he logged out of the google thing and said it was due to adds coming up, he wasn’t actually using the app.
Everything eventually built up and i have left and moved back to my parents’ house. He says that (previous issues aside) If we are breaking up because a computer said that he has used dating sites then good riddance... I don’t know why, but i feel so stupid for essentially “believing” a computer and destroying any plans we had for the future. I guess my AIBU is whether this is normal, whether I have made the right choice or not?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
To think this isn’t normal?
73 replies
CakeItOrLeave · 13/05/2020 09:02
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
149 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
3%
You are NOT being unreasonable
97%
Fluffybutter ·
13/05/2020 09:18
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