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AIBU?

Do you like yourself?

96 replies

HateIsNotGood · 10/05/2020 01:58

I do - the 'lockdown' has confirmed to myself that yes, actually I do like myself very much - 'warts' and all. I was never consumed with 'self-hatred' nor [in recent years] to be too cocky about myself.

But yes, loads of extra time with myself, confirms I'm very happy being me.

YANBU - you're happy with being you
YABU - you're not or too pissed off to even consider yourself, etc

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

170 votes. Final results.

POLL
You are being unreasonable
32%
You are NOT being unreasonable
68%
Krazynights34 · 10/05/2020 02:05

Definitely- never doubt it (but I’m 45..so maybe that’s a factor)

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CyberNan · 10/05/2020 02:07

i am happy with myself... i do my best and never intentionally harm anyone.

lock down has confirmed what i already suspected... my "friends" are flaky and i am my own best friend...

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DramaAlpaca · 10/05/2020 02:08

Yes. The older I get, I'm in my 50s, the more I accept and like myself.

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HateIsNotGood · 10/05/2020 02:28

All good things to hear from fellow likers of self. This sort of thing is often categorized as some sort of negative personality trait - but frankly if you don't like yourself how can you really like any thing else.

Hopefully some nightbirds can post their self-liking too - soz but this bird needs to sleep for now.

OP posts:
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Ethelfleda · 10/05/2020 07:37

I loathe myself.
On nearly a daily basis, my brain likes to remind me of random incidents where I have said or done the wrong thing or embarrassed myself in front of others and I dwell on it massively. It drives a huge impulse to stay away from people and be a hermit because I feel I cannot be trusted to even talk to other humans without making a twat of myself.

I always worry I am not kind enough, clever enough or as switched on as everyone else. I have near constant imposter syndrome at work and feel like my parenting skills are substandard.

Oddly enough, I’m fairly happy with how I look though!

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Ethelfleda · 10/05/2020 07:38

I’m glad you all like yourselves though and I don’t think it is a negative trait at all. It’s very admirable.

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BuddhaAtSea · 10/05/2020 07:42

@Ethelfleda I’m sad to hear you feel this way. I’m sure you know that, but I’ll say it anyway: it’s all in your head my lovely. We all make mistakes, not all of us excel at life. And you wouldn’t treat a friend or your children the way you seem to be treating yourself at the moment.
Do me a favour, do one act of kindness towards yourself today. Even if it is just sitting in the garden with a nice cup of coffee looking at the overcast sky.

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Meruem · 10/05/2020 07:44

lock down has confirmed what i already suspected... my "friends" are flaky and i am my own best friend

100% this! People who have contacted me, it has been clear that they’ve only contacted me to ease their own boredom, not out of any concern or care for me. But it’s ok because I do like myself and enjoy spending time alone, doing my own thing.

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Bluesheep8 · 10/05/2020 07:44

No I don't Hmm

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Ethelfleda · 10/05/2020 07:45

Thank you Buddha
Feel a little choked up reading that.

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Lostvoiced · 10/05/2020 07:47

In my rational brain yes I do.

I have anxiety so I often have unwanted thoughts of being a bad person or feelings that everyone hates me, but after 2 years of therapy I can recognize them as what they are, which is just my disordered brain.

However in general yes I do like myself. I think I'm a nice, caring and funny person. Recently I'm trying to develop myself in skills and healthy habits, this time not out of shame but out of a genuine desire to succeed at things.

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Thehogfatherstolemycurry · 10/05/2020 07:47

Yes, I'm ace Grin
In the words of Whitney "learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all"

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Heismyopendoor · 10/05/2020 07:48

I mostly like myself. I like who I am as a person.

I’m carrying some extra weight which I really don’t like but that doesn’t define me or determine my worth. I’m chubby, I’m trying to work on it. Doesn’t mean I shouldn’t like who I am or hate my body in the meantime.

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Ces6 · 10/05/2020 07:48

I don't dislike myself but I am hard work. I wish I would lighten up a bit. And I hate the way I look . I have always avoided mirrors but only realised this recently.

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saylor · 10/05/2020 07:48

YANBU

I love myself. Always have.

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StepAwayFromGoogle · 10/05/2020 07:49

Nope, lockdown has prooved to me that I'm an inadequate mother, inadequate employee and inadequate friend.

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SayakaMurata · 10/05/2020 07:49

I agree it's at least partly to do with age. I'm mid 40s and am very comfortable in my own skin, and am happy with my own company. I don't think I would have said that 15 years ago though!

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Ces6 · 10/05/2020 07:51

@Ethelfleda I feel the same. Oddly enough I am entirely convinced you are not as bad as you say. But I am very sure I am. Why are we so harsh on ourselves?

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SpillTheTeaa · 10/05/2020 07:53

YANBU.
Yes I do. I'm a good person with a good heart. My attitude is if you don't like it lump it. I don't need to deal with other people's negativity, eww.

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SpillTheTeaa · 10/05/2020 07:55

And I'm 27. I roughly had a time when I questioned myself then thought what the actual f. Usually other people's actions make you question your own worth. And nothing they do reflects on you as a person. Thanks

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Ethelfleda · 10/05/2020 07:55

Ces6 And I am convinced that neither are you!
I don’t know - I think there is an element of anxiety manifesting itself in negative thoughts.
I’ve always had anxiety but learned to control so many of the symptoms (panic attacks etc) that it seems this is the only way it comes out now! In self loathing!

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Pickles89 · 10/05/2020 07:58

There are lots of things I like about myself, and lots of things I really don't. The only thing that lockdown's changed is that it's motivated me to lose weight, so hopefully I'll be happier with my physical appearance when it's over.

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redcarbluecar · 10/05/2020 08:00

Yes on the whole. I get frustrated with myself but I wouldn't want to be anyone else.

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SnuggyBuggy · 10/05/2020 08:02

I liked myself more before lockdown. I felt functional and a decent mother. I just feel crap now.

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Giffgaff99 · 10/05/2020 08:06

Nope - I replay a lot of scenarios in myriad and overthink how I acted/reacted/what I said and get embarrassed to think I how I acted in any situation that has ever been.
I loathe how I look - in my head I'm the ugliest c**t that ever lived, I'm fat, gross and just a weirdo. Strangers have made comments to suportntgis, so it's true.
Nothing looks good on me clothes wise, everything looks good on everyone else - even down to the colour nail polish I have on.
I never feel.good about myself- I want lypo, nose job, facial peel, teeth whitening, Brazilian blow dry/hair straightening, botox, fillers, face and neck lift

I'm 44, size 12 on top, 14 on bottom. Tiny waist - these may sound may sound great but i can't see it

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