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To ask friends to stop posting pictures of their children outside

(180 Posts)
Fruitteatime Wed 08-Apr-20 22:45:55

I feel sick to my stomach every time I see photos of friends children enjoying their gardens. Just feel so guilty that dd and ds don't have the same chance to be outside as we live in a flat. I'm really worried for my mental health and theirs. I normally don't care because I felt we had a good balance between getting out and about and being at home.

I absolutely appreciate that this is preferable to having covid or overwhelming the nhs. I'd really like to know how I can shake this feeling though and what I can do to help my children.

Winnietheshit Wed 08-Apr-20 22:46:52

YABU. Can’t you go for walks?

Gamble66 Wed 08-Apr-20 22:47:53

You can walk and you can come off Facebook - it hard but not complicated

Olawisk Wed 08-Apr-20 22:48:06

No you cannot ask people to do this.

Go out for a walk.

Minesacider Wed 08-Apr-20 22:48:32

I'm sorry you're struggling like this, I would stop following your friends' pages for a while. You don't have to remove them from your friends list, but you can opt not to see their photos for a while.

fairynick Wed 08-Apr-20 22:48:57

I really feel for people for live in flats atm, especially those with young kids and now that the weather is nice.
Of course YABU to ask people not to share those photos, but maybe be kind to yourself and hide them from your Facebook news feed.
Haven’t got much advice expect for hang in there OP.

Fruitteatime Wed 08-Apr-20 22:49:25

Yes we can go for one walk a day. Ds is a toddler though so can't walk far. We could take buggy but then if we stay out long enough for dd to get some proper exercise he'd need a snack and I don't feel like snacking outside is acceptable at the moment.

LuluBellaBlue Wed 08-Apr-20 22:49:36

Unfollow people for the time being or get off FB. Why can’t you brake your children out for a long walk each day?

LuluBellaBlue Wed 08-Apr-20 22:50:12

Why can’t you snack outside???

blue25 Wed 08-Apr-20 22:51:32

No you can’t ask your friends to do that. Very strange that you see them as the problem. Come off Facebook if it upsets you that much.

Embracelife Wed 08-Apr-20 22:52:18

Your toddler wont see your social media photos.
Of course he can snack outside.
Take water and a snack and sit somewhere for five minutes to eat it. Just move on if you get asked to.

DonnaDarko Wed 08-Apr-20 22:52:30

Facebook is the thief of joy.

I would unfollow those people and focus on what you can do as a family

Minesacider Wed 08-Apr-20 22:52:47

Enjoy your daily walk OP, you're doing the best thing by sticking to the lockdown requirements. There will be people living in a flat who envy you being able to go outdoors, because they may have to be inside shielding/isolating. We're all just muddling through this as best we can.

SuperMumTum Wed 08-Apr-20 22:53:23

For a start come off social media or severely limit what you look at. People are always posting pictures of their "happy lives" which are often very very far from the truth. Try yo accept your situation (no garden) and do things like maximise your daily exercise allowance by trying new routes, challenges, races, borrow a dog for walks, maybe grow seeds on a window sill and get close to nature in other ways. My kids have enjoyed doing yoga on YouTube recently which is great for mental health and remaining mindful and grounded. Good luck you will get through it and your kids will hopefully have some fond memories of your family time.

Xmasbaby11 Wed 08-Apr-20 22:53:24

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. Definitely unfollow friends if it's upsetting you.

TheReluctantCountess Wed 08-Apr-20 22:53:41

Snooze them for 30 days on FB.

PleasantVille Wed 08-Apr-20 22:53:48

There's no rule about children having a snack outside, please don't make your children miss out on fresh air for such a non reason. Actually how would you need to be out for before they need a snack 2 or 3 hours? That's plenty.

FiveFootTwoEyesOfBlue Wed 08-Apr-20 22:54:11

Don't feel guilty, lots of people live in flats, and yes it's hard. Take them out for walks, I would think it's fine to give your kids snacks as you walk along, if necessary. Buggy should be fine.

buckeejit Wed 08-Apr-20 22:54:19

yabu. take a snack, but yes it is hard. Just remember its not forever. Hide them or stay off SM for a while. Good luck

CaryStoppins Wed 08-Apr-20 22:54:39

You don't need a snack just to go for a walk for an hour, and even if you did he could eat it in the buggy if you prefer.

I'd come off Facebook though if it's just stressing you out.

mochojoes Wed 08-Apr-20 22:55:15

I feel for you but you can't expect other people to not post garden photos because you don't have a garden. What about if someone posts a toy you don't have or eggs (which I can't get). By all means come off social media though.

Fruitteatime Wed 08-Apr-20 22:55:26

Thank you, I actually unfollowed a friend who regularly posts conspiracy theories a few months ago. I didn't think about doing it for people I actually like and usually enjoy seeing their posts and photos. So I will do that and I have uninstalled Instagram. I hope this makes a difference as although we still talk via WhatsApp and videoncall the photos are hitting me hardest.

Redglitter Wed 08-Apr-20 22:56:40

No you absolutely cant ask people to stop posting photos. As pp said you either need to unfollow/snooze people or come off fb.

Confused866 Wed 08-Apr-20 22:56:41

There’s no reason your son can’t have a snack outside if you’ve brought it from home and you’ve just been out walking, presuming there’s nothing for him to touch. You could just take hand gel with you as well and put some on his hands before he eats. If you’re out for an hour or so though surely he can go an hour without eating? Hide your friends posts if it makes you feel bad but don’t ask them to stop posting, that’s not fair. Everyone’s just trying to make the best of the situation we’re in, get your kids out for an hour a day and remember that some nice photos on social media don’t mean a lot, your friends may be struggling in other ways even if they have a nice garden so don’t dwell on it too much!

minipie Wed 08-Apr-20 22:57:00

A toddler snacking outside is fine IMO - just take a tub so you can catch any crumbs in case people get sniffy about that. Please do make the most of your daily exercise time, whether you get looks or not.

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