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To be angry at man in shopping queue

(179 Posts)
NameChangeInfinite Tue 07-Apr-20 23:35:05

Huge line outside Tesco’s this afternoon, wait was over 20 mins.

Man in front of me was puffing away at a cigarette the entire time. Lit up twice during the wait.

Tried to shield my nose and mouth as well as turning away from him to avoid smoke. But even with 2 metre distance I was definitely inhaling his smoke.

Eventually I lost it and very crossly asked him to think of others in the queue having to breathe in his smoke. Explained that we don’t know who has COVID or not and whether we can catch it through second hand smoke.

He barked at me to “shut up you ugly cow”.

Left me really shaken and close to tears.

If I was in the wrong the happy to be told so. But we don’t know if this virus can be transmitted through second hand smoke so surely he should be more considerate?

DracarysThis Tue 07-Apr-20 23:37:15

I'd have taken a self-scan device and parked up his arse for that.

WorraLiberty Tue 07-Apr-20 23:38:13

He was definitely inconsiderate so YANBU there.

YABU for 'losing it' though. A polite request for him to move away or put it out would've done.

islandislandisland Tue 07-Apr-20 23:39:12

What a fucking arsehole. flowers for you

MayTheGodsBeEverInYourFavour Tue 07-Apr-20 23:40:08

That's a good point I'd not thought of. I know it's outside, so strictly it's legal, but surely it's not within the spirit of the law that people smoke in outdoor queues, is it? Especially if you don't really have a choice.

Sorry you encountered such an arsehole. It wasn't personal. Arseholes are are always going to be arseholes.

ClapForCats Tue 07-Apr-20 23:40:50

Can the virus be transmitted via second-hand smoke?

Summersun77 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:41:16

Well you can’t catch it through second hand smoke so you were being ott for that. That being said it’s still rude of him to breathe his smelly cigarette smoke in the vicinity of everyone else queueing so YANBU for that reason.

Pentium85 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:41:40

He was BU to call you that


YABU for having lost it with him. You could've simply just asked

Summersun77 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:41:42

@ClapForCats no you can’t.

NameChangeInfinite Tue 07-Apr-20 23:41:56

Yes I take your point Worra.

But I should make it clear that my idea of “losing it” meant actually saying something at all. I’m usually the sort of person who avoids confrontation at all costs.

LimescaleCowboy Tue 07-Apr-20 23:42:34

Smoking is banned outside hospitals for a reason.

beethecrackon24995 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:43:40

There's always going to be scum and times like this the cunts are really noticeable. YWNBU.

NameChangeInfinite Tue 07-Apr-20 23:43:48

@Summersun77 do you definitely know that for a fact? If so I’d be very relieved

FizzyBug Tue 07-Apr-20 23:44:40

He's a man. Men don't like to be 'told off' by women and especially not in public, so he went straight for the misogynist insults.

Of course you weren't in the wrong, he knows it and so did everyone else who was in the queue.

If you're going to call out bad behaviour, you need to develop a thicker skin or weigh up whether it's worth the confrontation.

vodkaredbullgirl Tue 07-Apr-20 23:44:44

Oh dear there have been a lot of threads about smoking and angry people. Also even if this virus wasnt around, you would still get arseholes smoking in queues.

Im a smoker by the way, so shoot me now.

WorraLiberty Tue 07-Apr-20 23:44:57

Yes but you said you 'Very crossly asked him'.

There was no need for that. Everyone is tense at the moment for obvious reasons.

You were out of order for speaking to him in that way and he was definitely out of order in his reply.

I'd try to forget about it if I were you and just be thankful you're not his wife, daughter or mother wink

vodkaredbullgirl Tue 07-Apr-20 23:46:58

You could have asked him nicely though.

CoffeeRunner Tue 07-Apr-20 23:47:01

What about his right to smoke outdoors? Assuming it was totally outdoors?

When this all blows over we’ll all be crammed together in pub beer gardens with people smoking (some, not all obviously). Do you worry you can catch a cold or flu from that second hand smoke?

TBH it wouldn’t have even occurred to me that he may be doing something wrong.

UnaCorda Tue 07-Apr-20 23:47:51

Very inconsiderate to smoke in a situation where people can't move away, especially to light up a second cigarette.

Duck90 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:48:34

He shouldn’t have been smoking in the queue, that is anti social. But I wouldn’t have used the virus as the reason to ask him to stop (but I wouldn’t have said anything - but that is just how I deal with things).

I think seeing smoke travel should highlight how non visible particles can travel. So maybe 2 metres is not far enough. If that makes sense?

NameChangeInfinite Tue 07-Apr-20 23:50:37

Do you worry you can catch a cold or flu from that second hand smoke?

No I don’t because I as sure as can me that my immune system has the capability to deal with a cold or flu. Covid19 is completely unknown and is killing previously healthy people. Forgive me if you think that is an overreaction.

Summersun77 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:51:40

Yes there’s actually no evidence that it’s spread via smoking or vaping unless someone coughs as they’re exhaling smoke/vape clouds. So if he was coughing that’s a different story obviously.

Mythica Tue 07-Apr-20 23:52:21

I also smoke but never in public like this. There really is no need.
He could have waited.

Duck90 Tue 07-Apr-20 23:52:28

If you're going to call out bad behaviour, you need to develop a thicker skin or weigh up whether it's worth the confrontation.


catfeets Tue 07-Apr-20 23:57:42

@beethecrackon24995 I couldn't have said it better.

On the rare occasions I've left the house, I've had to breathe in fag smoke while I'm stuck in queues. I hate it at the best of times but when I'm stuck in a queue for 2hrs at the chemist with my baby in tow, I could really do without all the inconsiderate arseholes smoking next to me (before anyone asks why I didn't leave the baby at home, my partner is working so I have to take her with me).

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