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To feel nothings left for average families

(366 Posts)
Aubrystrawberry Thu 02-Apr-20 10:00:54

I fully support the vunerable and elderly getting special times to shop and think it's great that some supermarkets have kept slots for them. But.... Is anyone else feeling like it's a catch 22 for families? Especially ones with kids.

I have managed to get one slot in April through Asda. It was pure luck! I have children aged 2 and 4. My partner's still working all week and he's worried about catching this virus like the rest of us. We are trying to stay home because I'm anemic and don't know how dangerous it would be as I've been quite poorly. It's not recognised as a huge problem but I've read that we don't have enough red blood cells. (I've made another post on this)

Anyway I've just been on Asda to try add a couple of things on and see how much is now out of stock. It says I'm not allowed to amend until 2 days before it's delivered now. Fair enough. But for god's sake.

I've been on Iceland this morning and they put up a bright red warning that if I'm not elderly or vunerable there are no slots.

Morrisons said they have no slots at all anywhere.

Sainsbury's the same.

Tesco's the same.

I went on Amazon to try do a pantry shop. Nothing on there.

Luckily I get milk delivered. But it's becoming a nightmare trying to work out how i will get food in a couple of weeks time.

What do they expect from people? We are slagged off if we dare take a child or two in shops. We are judged for even being in town with kids. Not everyone but quite a few are vocal about it on our local page on Facebook. People are taking pictures of people trying to get them in trouble for being irresponsible. I'm trying to be responsible and keep the kids indoors and us out of germy shops with mucky trolley handles. But I'm being told on all supermarket websites we should go to the store If we can.

I am not sure how many more weeks this is going on for, but like many others we don't want to risk getting this virus so we want to stay home.

I guess there's nothing we can do. But I think the elderly and vunerable have had a fantastic amount of help and support as they have special times to shop, slots online, volunteers shopping for them. It just feels like families are being treated like vultures for wanting to feed their kids.

Also I didn't panic shop and now I wish I did!

LoisLittsLover Thu 02-Apr-20 10:05:39

Does your partner have a day off when you could go shopping alone? Or could he/she go on their way home from work

Marieo Thu 02-Apr-20 10:08:44

Asda seems reasonable, the issue with people going in all of the time to edit is that it puts additional strain on the server, meaning people can't get on to book a slot etc. Set a reminder for 2 days before and you can edit it then. The rest is unfortunate, there just isn't the deliver infrastructure to support the increase in demand, supermarkets are recruiting more drivers but it does take a bit of time. If your OH is out at work anyway can he grab a few bits? Not ideal I know, but if it's that or having no food?

Bercows Thu 02-Apr-20 10:10:13

You have a delivery slot and a partner who can shop unless they work 24/7. Lots of vulnerable people can't get slots and have no one to help. YABU.

sadforthekoalas Thu 02-Apr-20 10:11:20

Your partner needs to get a grip and go shopping

PenisBeakerDipper Thu 02-Apr-20 10:12:10

Can your partner not go after work? I feel your pain as my husband doesn’t drive due to disability and I am exclusively breastfeeding a 5 week old but it is what it is - I take him to the supermarket and wait in the car with baby whilst he queues and shops. He’s partially sighted so it takes bloody ages for him to find anything!!

corythatwas Thu 02-Apr-20 10:12:27

Is there a reason your partner can't do the shopping on his own, either on his day off or after/before work? Or alternatively mind the kids while you go shopping?

DonnaDarko Thu 02-Apr-20 10:12:39

Do you have any local newsagents or independent shops near you? The other week, we didn't get a bunch of stuff from Asda. We had to go to 3 different shops (co op, londis and a newsagent) but managed to get everything we needed.

I appreciate it is frustrating and annoying, but I don't think you need the slots more than the elderly or vulnerable.

I haven't seen it anywhere that being anaemic makes you more susceptible to the virus.

BMW6 Thu 02-Apr-20 10:12:49

I am failing to understand why your partner, who is out of the home working anyway, cannot call in at the supermarket after work to get some shopping, or go to the shops on a day off?

Or you go to the shops on his day off/after work while he takes care of the DC?

Shitsgettingcrazy Thu 02-Apr-20 10:15:38

With all due respect OP.

You do have options.

I am still working and have a dp and children. It's a good position to be in.

I go do the shopping (dp only has a motorbike) and he stays home with the kids.

I have anemia. It's about doing the best you can. It's not occured to me to take a delivery slot.

You have one. It's not the most ideal situation. But non of us have an ideal situation.

sadforthekoalas Thu 02-Apr-20 10:15:43

There are elderly people with arthritis etc who can't stand in long queues and there are reduced buses and can't get delivery slots and have no choice but to ask neighbours to go.

And you've taken a precious slot and are still moaning about it

Skittlesss Thu 02-Apr-20 10:16:06


Washyourhandsyoufilthyanimal Thu 02-Apr-20 10:16:17

You or your partner will have to stay home with kids and the other one go. That’s just it unfortunately.

midgebabe Thu 02-Apr-20 10:16:25

Speaking as a vulnerable but not shielded person, there is absolutely nothing for us

We are not elderly or obviously frail so don't qualify for elderly hours

We don't quality for priority booking of food delivery because that's only shielded people

Makes me a little mad when low risk people take up delivery and collection slots ( with low red blood you might not be low risk OP)

AnneLovesGilbert Thu 02-Apr-20 10:16:29

Can’t you go when your partner is working? Can’t he go after work? No one wants to be out more than they have to but you’re not self isolating because you or your kids are at particular risk and if you need food you need to go and get it. What are you expecting?

EmeraldShamrock Thu 02-Apr-20 10:16:36

Why can't your partner shop or you shop in the evening. I don't think it is fair to complain in your situation.
My Partner is working 50 hours, I've 2 SEN DC yet I wouldn't dream of booking a delivery slot. He goes on his day off or I'll head in the evening.
There are far more desperate people who have no options. *Wag's finger.

funnylittlefloozie Thu 02-Apr-20 10:19:43

Does your partner work completely unsocial hours, or shifts? Could he do a shop before or after work?

The supermarkets are really very quiet during the day, most of them seem to be organising access control fairly well and its reflected in good levels of stock, so minimal panic buying. If you are afraid of being slagged off online, go to a supermarket in the next town, then noone will know you.

Intelinside57 Thu 02-Apr-20 10:19:55

Where do people get this idea that the elderly are all getting special treatment? My Mum is 79, and has none of the health conditions required to be designated as vulnerable. She therefore can't get a delivery slot with any of the supermarkets. At least she's lucky that the family can get round to her, but there must be a lot in her situation being forced to go out when they really shouldn't.

Noconceptofnormal Thu 02-Apr-20 10:19:57

Just to say that elderly / vulnerable are not getting priority slots either. It's only if you are 'extremely vulnerable'. My parents and inlaws (both over 70/over 80)have not been able to get delivery slots with any retailer.

What I find weird is why the supermarkets are still ransacked, I would havd thought panic buyinv would have calmed down by now.

NekoShiro Thu 02-Apr-20 10:20:19

You're gonna have to get creative with food, I managed to buy some staples from Holland aand barret but delivery is two weeks away, you can do subscribe and save through them to get bits delivered every two weeks (or how ever often you wanna choose, atleast you know foods coming in) I also bought a 20kg bag of rice last week and it should only be another week or so before delivery, fingers crossed, and I found a farm that does veg box deliverys to my city and I've signed up to that weekly going forward, I've got a tesco slot tomorrow aand I'm adding all the kind of things to flavour dishes so my next month of rice and veg isn't so boring but I think you're gonna need to do similar, scour the Internet for bulk buying things, amazon's been empty for a couple weeks now so you're gonna have to try actual online stores instead of the supermarket

Nekoness Thu 02-Apr-20 10:20:49

Doesn’t your partner get a lunch break? Pass any petrol stations with markets attached to them? Funny how it all falls on you, eh? 🤨

Stressedout10 Thu 02-Apr-20 10:22:07

Sorry but your being ridiculous.
You have 2 adults in your home 1 stays at home with the kids and the other does the shopping.
Perhaps you should think about loan parents who have no choice but to take there DC with them

Aubrystrawberry Thu 02-Apr-20 10:22:44

Because we are trying to make sure I don't pick the virus up as I was quite poorly in Feb. I've only just started to pick back up but I am getting poorly again.

We can go to the local shops if we need to.. I'm just saying there's alot of judgemental people making parents feel stuck. People don't want your child in Morrisons. But they don't want you to have the slots either.

My oh will go and get us food. He's worried for me and doing his best to protect us as a family. But yes we will have to go.

I think I'm entitled to the slot I have booked. So please don't wag your finger at me. My son is 2 and had pneumonia last year too. He's absolutely fine and not using that as a right but I'm not going to put him at risk either just incase. Who knows what this virus can do to people.

Just my opinion it isn't going to be a popular one. Just fed up of the bright red warnings when the public will be the first to say omg that women has children in here. It's not a family outing bla bla.

TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince Thu 02-Apr-20 10:22:45

I’ve been finding Sainsbury is releasing a couple of days worth of slots in the next 3 or 4 days. You can’t get far ahead, but you can get slots the day after tomorrow or so.

EmeraldShamrock Thu 02-Apr-20 10:22:47

Just to say that elderly / vulnerable are not getting priority slots either. It's only if you are 'extremely vulnerable'. My parents and inlaws (both over 70/over 80)have not been able to get delivery slots with any retailer Definitely, many elderly can't use the internet, many can't walk to the shop for the special hour. It is horrible, desperate times.

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