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If you are receiving shopping via volunteers please can I request

(441 Posts)
MatildaTheCat Tue 31-Mar-20 15:25:14

That you stick to essential items and keep them as non specific as possible. DH and I shopped for two vulnerable people this morning under an official scheme. Their requests included 1 litre gin (ok maybe essential), branded tonic, branded cleaning items, organic gala apples, rose and raspberry lemonade, non sweetened organic coconut milk and on and on.

I lost a lot of sleep last night worrying about the additional exposure to the public while searching for half this stuff. In fact we did get pretty much everything but had we been asked for ie large brown loaf, cheddar, packet of bacon, mince, frozen peas it would have been a lot less stressful. This is going to last some months for the most vulnerable, if you or your family are in that category please help by keeping it simple.

Thank you.

STAYTHEFUCKHOME Tue 31-Mar-20 15:30:46

Ok, so what can be ordered your highness?

GrumpyHoonMain Tue 31-Mar-20 15:32:05

I think you’re being unreasonable sorry. If volunteering is too much for you then stop but you don’t get to ask people to stop buying what they need. If someone is shielding or isolating alone in their homes then often it’s the little things (like treat food) that give the most joy.

DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult Tue 31-Mar-20 15:32:23

Yab so kind to volunteer, but I do think yabu to request that people pay for shopping they may not like or possibly can't eat to keep it simple for people who have volunteered to help out.

If its causing you enough stress to be losing sleep over then you should maybe see if there are other things to help out with instead.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants Tue 31-Mar-20 15:32:32

TBF, I don't think what the OP is suggesting is unreasonable.

Thehop Tue 31-Mar-20 15:32:38

I would t be thy picky, o can totally see your point.

Thehop Tue 31-Mar-20 15:32:56

Jesus sorry

I wouldn’t be that picky and I totally see your point

DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou Tue 31-Mar-20 15:33:28

I don't think YABU at all.

If someone as doing me the kind favour to do my shopping in order to protect me and others, I would make it as generic as possible.

Orange squash


Darkstar4855 Tue 31-Mar-20 15:33:30

Why didn’t you talk to them about it? Or just get what you could easily manage to find?

TruckStopTrash Tue 31-Mar-20 15:33:46

Bad enough that they cant go out.

DontBiteTheBoobThatFeedsYou Tue 31-Mar-20 15:34:32

Ok, so what can be ordered your highness?

Do you actually understand what the OP is doing?

bluewafflewithmayo Tue 31-Mar-20 15:34:42

Why not give them a list of items you'll deign to buy so they know to ask someone else who won't be nit-picking their purchases?

itbemay Tue 31-Mar-20 15:35:18

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all! If someone was getting my shopping i would be giving a generic list and be very grateful! Thank you for volunteering!

FusionChefGeoff Tue 31-Mar-20 15:35:29

No need for that - I get your point OP but think a half way house (as always) would be good eg not being specific about brands etc and making it clear if something was essential due to allergies or just a preference and what suitable / easier alternatives would be ok.

Eg I love St Pellegrino lemonade but I would also say ‘sprite or lemon squash also fine’

P1nkHeartLovesCake Tue 31-Mar-20 15:35:38

What a bastard that vulnerable person was wanting a few treats while locked in! Should of been happy with plain rice and water

I’d pre warn them I might have to get another brand if the one they want is not in stock but who wouldn’t want to get them treats

Not sure volunteering is for you....

Howmanysleepsnow Tue 31-Mar-20 15:36:08

YANBU. It’d be different if they said
Apples, preferably gala and organic
Apples, must be organic, if not get pears

EineReiseDurchDieZeit Tue 31-Mar-20 15:36:11

Can see both sides here to be honest.

Just as one mans trash etc

Your "specific, odd, frivolous" could be "basic staple" to them.

dementedpixie Tue 31-Mar-20 15:36:17

If you have to go round multiple shops to buy a specific brand then that would be a pain in the arse. You need to ask for acceptable substitutes if the shop you're in doesnt have the specified product

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Tue 31-Mar-20 15:36:23

I wouldn't personally be that picky because I know that the shops near us are in a sort of weird half-way state of having enough stock, but not enough of everything, iyswim. So I know that I'd be able to get tonic, but not the particular brand of tonic I like, and it would be a pita for someone else to sift through the options and find the nearest.

But if you're losing sleep about shopping, you shouldn't be doing it. Being out for 10 minutes longer doesn't really add to your risk, especially if your supermarket has a one way system going.

Gottalovesummer Tue 31-Mar-20 15:36:45

I can't believe this post!

Your go the shop anyway, so what's the additional exposure?

I'm also part of a community group and an shopping for several people.

I try and get everything on their list, inc their wine/sweets/ice cream etc. And whatever brand they want if it's available.

Why wouldn't you do the same if you're already in the shop?

dementedpixie Tue 31-Mar-20 15:38:07

The additional exposure is if OP needs to go to multiple shops to buy a specific brand of product

Fucket Tue 31-Mar-20 15:38:59

We are ordering food to be delivered from the farm shop. I give a list of what I’d like, then I stipulate happy for any substitutions. I then thank them profusely for going out of their way for us. And when this is all over I will forever get my fruit and vegetables from their business because without them we’d be truly fucked right now.

Coronacantcope Tue 31-Mar-20 15:39:14

We are likely to need this service once our current supplies run out and while I'd be very grateful for help I think YABU. We eat what we eat, it's hard enough being in lockdown and I've given up enough without changing our diets or eating stuff we're unused to. If you're that afraid of transmission leave the volunteering to others.

Carbosug Tue 31-Mar-20 15:39:49

YANBU. If someone was shopping for me I would be trying to make it as easy as possible. It is unfair to be overly specific or to ask for unnecessary items that might be hard to find. Okay to ask for some milk chocolate for example but not really fair to specify 'Green and Black organic milk chocolate'.

Apolloanddaphne Tue 31-Mar-20 15:40:43

I get you. I sent my DD for the shopping yesterday and just asked her to get what she could to the nearest equivalent of our usual things. It his fine to ask for specifics with the proviso that if they are not available you specify if you are not fussy or would rather not have a sub.

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