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To stop DH teaching DS about countries/the world?

(158 Posts)
NewNameEveryWeek Wed 26-Feb-20 13:04:23

DS is 16 months old. He seems pretty bright for his age (he can say 20+ words already) but DH seems to think that DS is a genius.

We've already had arguments because DH was trying to teach DS colours at 14 months old. DH would ask DS to bring him something red, and DS would usually look confused and fail, or sometimes randomly choose something that happened to be red and DH would take this as conclusive proof that DS knows colours now. It was frustrating to watch as DS looked so bewildered most of the time. I actually thought the way DH was going about it could be bad for DS's development, eg DS can understand what a dog is and will point them out and say "dog" and trying to get DS to associate brown dogs with the word "brown" as well as "dog" is a bit much at this stage if that makes sense.

Now DH is asking me to look for a globe or atlas for DS. He wants to teach him to eg point at Australia when DH asks him to. I haven't bought one yet as I think it's a pointless thing to teach DS at his age. With enough practice he probably could learn to point at the different counties/continents but it won't mean anything to him and he's be better off learning useful easy words first.

AIBU to tell DH we're not buying a globe?

Or should I just let him get on with it? He seems to want me to buy the globe though as he expects me to do all the shopping which is frustrating. I suppose it won't be as bad as the whole colours fiasco anyway.

PristineCondition Wed 26-Feb-20 13:06:13

You teach what you want and let dh do what he wants

JuanSheetIsPlenty Wed 26-Feb-20 13:07:14

Let him crack on. As long as he’s not disappointed or frustrated with DS when he doesn’t get it.

SickOFant Wed 26-Feb-20 13:07:31

Your OP made me laugh grin grin

I'd just get the globe then put your feet up and MN while your DH tries to turn your son into Marco Polo grin

Likethebattle Wed 26-Feb-20 13:07:37

Why not buy one anyway as they are handy for when dscwikl start learning about the world?

AryaStarkWolf Wed 26-Feb-20 13:09:20

The fact that he expects you to go "fetch it" for him is the most annoying thing in your post. Does he think you're his personal shopper?

Lostkeyagain Wed 26-Feb-20 13:09:40

The benefit that your DS will derive from an adult chatting to him, looking at a book together and generally taking an interest will be very beneficial IMO.

5foot5 Wed 26-Feb-20 13:10:33

If I was trying to "hot house" my tiny toddler I don't think countries / the world would be my first thought. I would have started on the counting or something

firawla Wed 26-Feb-20 13:11:33

I’d just let him get on with it but tell him to buy the globe himself if he wants it

gamerchick Wed 26-Feb-20 13:12:07

Let him get on with it, as long as it's fun and he doesn't get cross if he gets it wrong or anything.

Tell him to buy his own sodden globe though. Lazy git.

RevolutionofourTime Wed 26-Feb-20 13:12:43

DS will not always be 16 months. A globe or atlas will be used, if not now then later.

You and your DH are missing a trick here - I remember the fun I had teaching DD the names of famous dictators. There’s something really hilarious seeing a toddler say Mobutu Sese Seko, Muammar Gaddafi and Idi Amin Dada.

Or teach DS formal greetings in various languages. I loved when my kids said Enchanté when meeting someone new.

Their brains are like sponges at that age...

HotDogGuy Wed 26-Feb-20 13:14:24

Not a globe but my eldest loved looking at a kids atlas - one with animals and buildings on - I’d just sit and talk to him. I think his animal knowledge came on and his general talking.
Just let him get on with it

Chamomileteaplease Wed 26-Feb-20 13:14:55

But it's not just "chatting and taking an interest" in his son, this man is confusing him and making him look bewildered.

It would drive me mad too OP. Sounds like he is doing more harm than good. Has your dh got some sort of chip on his shoulder about intelligence?

I would refuse to get the globe and I would have a proper chat with him about your concerns. You could frame it as taking the pressure off dh as these things ie colours will come. Does he not know anything about normal milestones?

It would really upset me to see my child look confused and bewildered and under some sort of pressure to perform.

GothamProtector Wed 26-Feb-20 13:15:08

He's actively engaging with a toddler who will thrive from the one to one engagement, eye contact and vocabulary.
He is not going to associate brown with dog when he's 30 hmm

Relax. Let DH and DS enjoy their time together.

ellenpartridge Wed 26-Feb-20 13:15:47

I would have no issue with him buying a globe but would leave him to do it himself if he wants. He does sound a bit bonkers but pretty harmless...

KahlanRahl Wed 26-Feb-20 13:16:27

The funny thing is that he isn't even teaching the child where Australia is, he is just teaching him that that shape is called Australia.

It doesn't sound very harmful. I wouldn't fetch him something (you're not his slave) but I'd just let him do what he wants. Just make sure that you teach him the basics

NotYourHun Wed 26-Feb-20 13:17:12

He’s being enthusiastic which is sweet but he’s probably not doing himself or DS many favours. Asking a child to repeat things over and over is something SALT advise against usually. If DS enjoys his games, and isn’t trying to do other things or getting cross, he’s probably fine. Best thing to do is just play and read. Kids pick things up alarmingly fast when left to their own devices. My 18 month old brought me a block earlier saying ‘two two two’... bugger me, it was actually the number two. Assumed it was a fluke but he did it again! Never once have I sat down and tried to make him learn numbers. We count when playing or singing but that’s it.

NearlyGranny Wed 26-Feb-20 13:18:29

Best thing at this age is face to face interaction/conversation, tbh. Suggest DH does songs and nursery rhymes with his DS, clapping games etc. That's what will develop his intelligence. What your DH is doing is more like testing! DS will have enough of that in his life.

If he wants a globe, he can find it himself. But the best sort is an unbreakable one, about 30cm diameter, that sits on a ring. I got one for ste GC as a 7th birthday present.

Much better to buy a book of nursery rhymes imo. Lifelong career in education with a specialism in vocabulary acquisition speaking here!

ineedaholidaynow Wed 26-Feb-20 13:19:36

You can get some children friendly wall posters of the map of the world, so with animal pictures etc. That might be of more interest to your DS, but I would be expecting your DH to buy it if he wants to teach DS about it

NewNameEveryWeek Wed 26-Feb-20 13:20:27

But it's not just "chatting and taking an interest" in his son, this man is confusing him and making him look bewildered.

Exactly. DS looks so sad when he can't figure out what will please DH.

You and your DH are missing a trick here - I remember the fun I had teaching DD the names of famous dictators. There’s something really hilarious seeing a toddler say Mobutu Sese Seko, Muammar Gaddafi and Idi Amin Dada.

KoalasandRabbit Wed 26-Feb-20 13:20:42

I'ld leave him to it as long as he's not expressing his disappointment that your child doesn't know something or child is getting distressed.

I had one male friend message me as he wanted a recommendation of a book to teach his child English, his child wasn't even born at that stage shock And a male work colleague mother not even pregnant asked me if I could help him make a spreadsheet of costs for a child every year for their life. confused

DesLynamsMoustache Wed 26-Feb-20 13:22:25

Sounds a bit full-on, really. Does your son seem to be having fun? Or is he just confused and unsure what's expected of him? And why do you have to buy the globe?!

I think if your son doesn't really care and enjoys the attention then it's fairly harmless, although I'd be worried it was a sign of things to come from your husband in terms of parental pressure and expectations. But if your son is looking unhappy or anxious about it then absolutely I would step in. There's a difference between teaching things and having fun with it and labouring a point and making children anxious when they aren't 'getting' it.

Sosososotired Wed 26-Feb-20 13:22:46

I’m sure my kids were starting to learn colours at that age, so not sure why you would be discouraging that. That seems weird. Equally if your dh wants to teach him countries I’d let him crack on. He’s engaging him and your sons will benefit from the interaction.

5foot5 Wed 26-Feb-20 13:23:00

It would really upset me to see my child look confused and bewildered

Don't most small children look bewildered most of the time? I kind of thought it was their default expression.

Much better to buy a book of nursery rhymes imo.
Good shout. Better than getting him learning stuff he doesn't understand yet. Have plenty of books and read and read and read to him.

Hoppinggreen Wed 26-Feb-20 13:23:05

Reading and interacting with your toddler is great but it sounds like your DH thinks he’s a performing seal
If he doesn’t chill out he will put your child off learning, at that age it’s supposed to be fun

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