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To think it's unacceptable thing my GP said

(80 Posts)
idontwanttogotoschool Tue 25-Feb-20 14:12:25

I saw my GP last week for my 6 week check. Generally my GP doesn't give the mother a 6 week check the receptionist told me as it's a waste of their time. So obviously GP was already miffed he had to give me a double appointment, so to see me and check my newborn.

Anyway I had some health issues with Gestational diabetes late in my pregnancy so that's why I wanted to check, but I mentioned I am wetting myself a bit when I bend, carry or lift baby. And the GP said well that's normal after your second child, and that was his advice. I said nothing I can do, as I wondered if it was just early days since birth. He said it's a long term thing ask your other friends with two children and it is just what happens.

So I'm disappointed he is saying live with wetting issue and I'm annoyed this is acceptable for women.

Greggers2017 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:13:47

Google pelvic floor exercises and do those. It really is the only thing that generally helps.

AnneLovesGilbert Tue 25-Feb-20 14:14:27

That’s completely unacceptable. If you wanted advice from your friends and family you’d ask for it. You asked for advice about a potential medical issue from your medical professional. He sounds useless.

ActualHornist Tue 25-Feb-20 14:15:25

YANBU to basically be told to get on with it. However, I do think 6 weeks post birth there isn’t much you can do. You may not be completely healed.

Thomasina79 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:16:28

I think that this was completely unacceptable, rude and dismissive and in my opinion you should ask for a second opinion. I think it is also unacceptable for the receptionist to say the six week check is not worth their while.

Personally I would be looking for a new GP. I hope you get this sorted.

Jellybean100 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:16:32

You need to see a physio. Look in to private women’s health physios nearby. Even if you don’t book a block and only go once you can get a good assessment and some advice. It is not completely normal and your GP sounds disinterested. Yes it is common but women don’t need to put up with wetting themselves for the rest of their life because of childbirth. You need to train your pelvic floor by doing pelvic floor exercises but I would really really recommend a physio

ClubfootMaestro Tue 25-Feb-20 14:20:10

This is unacceptable and sadly typical of the minimisation of birth injuries women suffer. It is common, but it is also distressing and inconvenient and there are treatment options. At 6w pp, it may yet improve if its own accord but I echo the recommendation for pelvic floor physio. If you can’t afford it, insist on a referral from your GP. In the meantime, download Squeezy app from the NHS to remind you and time you through some long and short hold exercises (both are important). Congratulations on your baby and sorry you’re not receiving proper support flowers

BreconBeBuggered Tue 25-Feb-20 14:23:52

Not acceptable, no. You need help to resolve this. Something being common doesn't mean it's not fixable. I would, at the very least, see a different GP about this.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius Tue 25-Feb-20 14:26:46

Your GP’s attitude stinks, @idontwanttogotoschool! I don’t blame you for being cross.

And whilst a bit of incontinence is not unusual after childbirth, it is not a long term thing, in the vast majority of cases. As others have said, you need to do your pelvic floor exercises - if you go to the Gusset Grippers page on FB, they have lots of good advice.

I have had problems with stress incontinence in the past, and doing the exercises really helped, I promise.

viques Tue 25-Feb-20 14:30:20

In France I think it is fairly standard practice for women to be given advice on pelvic floor health after giving birth. SHould be here too, it would save the NHS squillions in anxiety meds, prolapse surgery etc etc.

In the meantime there is a very helpful, and very funny, YouTube video on pelvic floor exercise, Google YouTube gussy Edinburgh , should get you there. I think the woman doing it used to be on mumsnet, possibly still is.

Bluntness100 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:33:30

Bloody hell, ask other mums of two, yup, that’s totally not ok.

Some doctors are a bit shit.

I recall seeing an elderly one close to retirement, I was feeling really run down, he had a trainee with him during the appt.

I explained my symptoms, and happened to comment I’d gained a bit of weight as well, i was thinking thyroid or something, I was about eleven stone, five foot eight, size twelve. and he said

“ you’ll feel a lot better when you get all that weight off” and that was it, he was done.

Both me and the female trainee looked at him aghast and then made eye contact, she said nothing though to intervene.

I’m really not sure there is much you can do, I’d assume complaining does fuck all.

canithrottlesomeppl Tue 25-Feb-20 14:33:33

Honestly pelvic floor exercises were a god send after my third. I use to dribble excuse the wording if I sneezed or got up off the sofa to quick. I started to do pelvic exercises as much as I could and about a month in I stopped dribbling as much and now I'm fine.

Ask to see another GP if your really concerned or speak to your tv.

canithrottlesomeppl Tue 25-Feb-20 14:33:44


SVRT19674 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:34:51

It's common but not normal, and no you don't have to put up with it. Look up pelvic floor exercises and start doing them. I follow ourfitfamilylife on instagram. She has plenty of such exercises and also for problems with diastasi recti.

Anon234 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:35:50

Sorry, but that's rubbish. I had 3 babies in 4 years, all naturally and I've never had an issue with weeing myself (I have other issues, pretty awful haemorrhoids and a suspected rectocele amongst them so I'm really not being smug!) It's dismissive comments like the one made by your GP that make women just put up with often treatable conditions that can have a significant impact upon their physical and emotional wellbeing. Just because you've had a baby doesn't mean you now have to accept this as your lot in life; obviously it's not life threatening and you're not unwell but your GP should at least be prepared to give you some (accurate) advice instead of just fobbing you off. I dont think you're being unreasonable at all.
In terms of advice, from what I have been told by friends, a women's health physio would probably be the best place to start. But at 6 weeks your body is still healing and you'll probably find that things will improve over the next few months. Congratulations on your baby, by the way x

SinkGirl Tue 25-Feb-20 14:42:05

Our CCG have stopped funding 6 week checks from GPs and I suspect others have too. Absolutely shocking.

Craftycorvid Tue 25-Feb-20 14:45:24

Assume male GP? How would he like peeing himself at random intervals? Not ok at all. I’d be complaining.

Molly2017 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:52:24

I had physio at the hospital for a yr after child number 1 because of a 3rd degree tear. She taught me loads of exercises to do to help with this.
Must admit that after child number 2 I do still experience issues occasionally when I exercise but I do my pelvic floor type exercises and that does help. Although it’s a pain having to do these still 2 yrs later.
I’d ask for a second opinion to get a referral to the physio department at your hospital. I got mine automatically with child number 1 because of the severity of my tear but I know you can get them through you’re GP too.

Molly2017 Tue 25-Feb-20 14:53:10

your GP

QuiteTiredOut Tue 25-Feb-20 14:54:46

Download the squeezy NHS app. A women’s health physio recommended it to me.

Summercamping Tue 25-Feb-20 14:56:34

I eventually bought a pelvic floor muscle toner, and it was absolutely brilliant.

Your gp is beyond useless.

Nomorechickens Tue 25-Feb-20 14:57:14

I have a GP like this, the receptionist noted on my record that I don't want to be offered an appointment with him (along with 50% of patients she said)

PlonkyPlink Tue 25-Feb-20 14:57:50

I’m a GP and that’s awful. There’s lots you can do as other posters have pointed out. Regular pelvic floor exercises work really well for most, along with weight loss if that’s an issue. If this fails, I refer to gynae physio who I get great feedback about. Go see someone else if pelvic floor exercises not working.

Raspberrytruffle Tue 25-Feb-20 15:07:41

Yanbu I think women post partum seem to get forgotten about, my second dd was born 10 weeks early due to gbs infection so the first 10 weeks were a complete whirl to me I barely survived inbetween looking after my toddler and spending all day at the scubu unit as I had no support or help so yeah my check kind got forgot until I went to see my doctor about something else when baby was 9 months old

user1480880826 Tue 25-Feb-20 15:10:28

You need to make a formal complaint. Firstly for being told a 6 week check is not routine (it most certainly is and is extremely important) and secondly for being told to just accept the issues that you are experiencing.

If men gave birth they would be treated entirely differently by the medical profession. It boils my blood.

Complain, complain and complain some more.

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