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AIBU?

To take my kids out of school 15 mins early once a week?

309 replies

AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 16:51

I have primary age DC at separate schools (not through choice).

Dc1’s school finishes later on one day due to off site swimming and p.e. This means they need collecting 15 mins after other DC on that day and the schools are 20 mins apart (we are rural).

Younger DC school has no parent on site parking, just a staff car park. I have a 7-10 min walk from their school to my car.

I spoke to the office lady in the summer and she said she ‘couldn’t see a problem’ with me driving up to the staff car park one day a week to enable me to only be 5 mins late for DC1.

The school business manager has just come and told me the car park is no parking for parents etc. Explained situation and she huffily said she would check with office lady but that she ‘didn’t believe that to be the case’ - implying I’m lying?

I’m now feeling anxious about the whole thing.

I have no one who can collect Dc1 on that day so my only other option if I can’t park on site is to collect younger DC 15 mins early on that day so I can get to Dc1 on time.

So WIBU to say I will be collecting th early once a week if they will no longer let me park in the staff car park that day?

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LochJessMonster · 24/02/2020 16:55

Why can't you collect DC1 15 minutes later?
Is it a public swimming pool where he can sit and wait in reception?

I'm not sure what you can do about it, but taking Dc out 15 minutes early is going to be disruptive to him, the teacher and the rest of the class imo.

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Holymolymackerel · 24/02/2020 16:57

I had a very similar situation. I had to use after school club for 1 child for 15 minutes to bridge the time at a cost of £2 each time. Was expensive and such a stress.

Now they are at the same school as a place came up.

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 16:57

Dc1s school goes to the pool and then returns to school. I would be 15-20 mins late collecting him from school so he would be sat out in all weathers for 15 mins at least. Obviously I can’t expect teachers to stay late to wait with him.

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 16:58

holy dc1s school has no after school club so it would be putting 3 you get dc in after school club for 45 mins- 1 hour - I don’t have that money!

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 16:59
  • younger not you get Hmm
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Embracelife · 24/02/2020 17:01

Use for dc1 or dc2 for half hour to one hour
After school club
Another parent
Childminder paid
Teacher assistant (paid)

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LochJessMonster · 24/02/2020 17:01

Right I'm confused.
How do you pick them up on a normal day? If they are 20 minutes apart then one has to be picked up later anyway?

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Embracelife · 24/02/2020 17:02

You can get tax benefits to pay after school club ?
Another parent for dc1 to take him and you pick up from theirs? Reciprocate another day?

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Mamato2gorgeousboys · 24/02/2020 17:03

What do you do on the days when the schools finish at the same time?

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TeenPlusTwenties · 24/02/2020 17:03

Can you collect from the school instead? Would that help? That's what some parents at DD's old primary did. Some were otherwise walking past their own home to get back to school, then turning tail and walking home again.

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FamilyOfAliens · 24/02/2020 17:04

I spoke to the office lady in the summer and she said she ‘couldn’t see a problem’ with me driving up to the staff car park one day a week

I’m surprised someone working in the office felt they could give a parent permission to park in the staff car park.

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TeenPlusTwenties · 24/02/2020 17:04

Duh. Not school. Swimming pool. Collect from the swimming pool instead.

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Sirzy · 24/02/2020 17:06

Can another parent pick up DS1 on that day?

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 17:06

Dh helps with school runs on other days, but that only works when younger dc are out before older - he collects younger and by the time he walked back to car I arrive with Dc1 to collect younger ones off him.

I’m not in a position to reciprocate with other parents due to juggling of the school runs as it is. My parents help on other days but they can’t on Monday.

We don’t qualify for benefits but I cannot afford £15 a week for an hour of after school club.

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Nowayorhighway · 24/02/2020 17:07

I don’t think it’s feasible having them in separate schools really, are they on waiting lists for one another’s schools at all? My DC were put in different schools to begin with but I had them on waiting lists and luckily only had to wait three months. It’s just not a feasible long term option, especially since the schools are so far apart.

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user1493494961 · 24/02/2020 17:07

Good suggestion to collect from swimming pool, if not collect your other child early if needs must, it won't be forever.

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ohnooutofdateham · 24/02/2020 17:07

I'm confused as to how you collect them normally? Surely it makes it easier if one finishes 15 minutes later?

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ChicCroissant · 24/02/2020 17:07

So what do you do normally, if the schools are 20 minutes apart?

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 17:08

The pool is 25mins in another direction so wouldn’t get back on time even if I could collect him from there.

We are relatively new at the school so I don’t know other parents well yet.

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Sirzy · 24/02/2020 17:10

I think if moving DS1 to the same school as his siblings isn’t an option then you need to suck it up and pay for after school club once a week or jiggle things so your dh can do one of the pick ups that day.

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NAFScamander · 24/02/2020 17:12

Picking up 15 minutes early once a week is totally reasonable. I’ve don’t it for a couple of years as otherwise they can’t get to dance class in time. School are completely on board with it xx

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 17:13

Separate schools is not my choice, no spaces and we’ve lost appeals to move them. We’re stuck with it.

We can make it work except this one thing which I have been doing for 2 terms without issue but they are now ‘clamping down’ on parents parking on the school site.

It’s complicated to explain - DH’s office is near younger dc school, he can fly out for half an hour to collect and wait with them for me to get there with Dc1 (Dc1 usually finishes 15 mins before the younger ones so by the time dh has walked them to were I park my car i have arrived to meet them. He cannot do this if he’s out of the office for more like 45-1hr when the pick up tomes are reversed.

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2020newme · 24/02/2020 17:13

Dc1’s school finishes later on one day due to off site swimming and p.e. This means they need collecting 15 mins after other DC on that day and the schools are 20 mins apart (we are rural)

So just do what you do every other day - get DH to pitch in.

No way should you flounce about saying you will collect DC early just because you can't park in the car park. You will come across as THAT PARENT and a total CF.

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bigchris · 24/02/2020 17:13

You need to apply for the same school on the basis you can't be in 2 places at once or pay for aftersch club

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AnabelleClarabelle · 24/02/2020 17:14

If it makes a difference they would be missing assembly not lessons.

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