Advanced search

DH asked me to take underwear pics at work

(291 Posts)
AdalbertWaffling Wed 22-Jan-20 17:31:57

So today I get a text from DH asking for me to go and take some pics of me in my underwear in the loos at work and send them to him. I replied "No... X". Firstly I was super busy so didn't have time, secondly I can't think of anything less sexy than taking my top off in a toilet cubicle and trying to take a selfie, and thirdly I'M AT WORK so really didn't feel like it was appropriate.

I have now asked him something else and just got back "No... X", so he's obviously pissed off at my response, or lack of. Tbh knowing him he probably would have been fine with me saying no by laughing it off, or in a way that didn't make him feel bad for asking. I'm really not sure if IABU here! I don't think I was in that I was at work, but also we're in a loving relationship and maybe I should have been a bit kinder in my response? Or maybe I should have just nipped off for 2 mins, taken a selfie and not been such a prude???

Lumene Wed 22-Jan-20 17:33:26

YANBU just talk about it later x

earlycat Wed 22-Jan-20 17:33:35

I wouldn't have done it.

Tish008 Wed 22-Jan-20 17:34:46

You don't exist to satisfy anyones fantasy.

Stand your ground

picklemepopcorn Wed 22-Jan-20 17:34:45

Absolutely not!

I'm lost for words. I don't know what work you do, but if my colleagues/employees were whipping into the toilets to take/send photos .... grim. Unprofessional. Inappropriate.

ItsJustTheOneSwanActually Wed 22-Jan-20 17:34:59


okiedokieme Wed 22-Jan-20 17:35:03

Sorry that's just weird ... work is for work surely. Am I really that behind the times? I have made personal calls and sent texts but they are things that actually are quite urgent (well important eg which flight time grin) not chit chat

Wearywithteens Wed 22-Jan-20 17:35:33

No you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. Equally he’s a bit narked because you wouldn’t help him out in his wank time. It’s not a big deal. He’ll get over it and he should learn that his wife is allowed to say no.

QueenofLouisiana Wed 22-Jan-20 17:36:26, not an appropriate thing to do at work.

TBF my reaction may be coloured by the fact that I work in primary education- taking a lewd snap while working there would land you in big trouble. But still, no.

DukeChatsworth Wed 22-Jan-20 17:37:32


SleepWarrior Wed 22-Jan-20 17:38:34

I suppose the intended tone isn't clear. He may have meant it jokily, or half seriously and then think he's being silly by matching your 'No...x' reply later on.

You need to have an actual face to face conversation and see what happens. If he's cross or defensive then he's being very out of order.

Topseyt Wed 22-Jan-20 17:39:47

Utterly inappropriate. I would have told him to fuck right off. No way would I even consider doing that.

toffeeghirlinatwirl Wed 22-Jan-20 17:39:54

Just no.

Rachelfromfriends1 Wed 22-Jan-20 17:40:09

You can’t be forced to take nudes if you don’t want to.

I would take a normal selfie or a normal mirror pic but not something like that.

Public toilets (inc at work) are grim. I wouldn’t physically be able to undress take a nice sexy pic in a smelly/filthy bathroom with nasty sounds emanating from the cubicle next door! Where would you have even placed your top, I mean there’s nowhere sanitary for it to rest and then you’d have to place it back on after 🤢

GruciusMalfoy Wed 22-Jan-20 17:40:12

Does he usually ask you to do this sort of thing? Yanbu for not doing it, or not wanting to.

PooWillyBumBum Wed 22-Jan-20 17:40:43

He could just be joking with the No...X. If my DH wrote that in response it’d be light hearted. Then again mine wouldn’t ask me to strip in the loo haha.

user3575796673 Wed 22-Jan-20 17:41:02

Does he call you a prude?

gingerchaos Wed 22-Jan-20 17:41:14

No. It's not your purpose in life.

LaurieSchafferIsAllBitterNow Wed 22-Jan-20 17:41:40

does he often ask you to do such sleazy things?

Likefootball Wed 22-Jan-20 17:41:57

Not appropriate

Bluntness100 Wed 22-Jan-20 17:43:13

Honestly that's just weird.

BathTangle Wed 22-Jan-20 17:43:16

Where I work if I did what he suggested I could be sacked for gross misconduct. YANBU.

constantlyseekinghappiness Wed 22-Jan-20 17:44:46

This is really grim.

Is this the sort of relationship you have or did this come completely out of the blue?

If the latter id seriously be concerned. If the former, and you’ve previously done this, then you were not unreasonable to say no on this occasion.

hopeishere Wed 22-Jan-20 17:46:01

Have you sent him those sort of pics before?

recrudescence Wed 22-Jan-20 17:48:13

Completely unreasonable ... unless you work in a lingerie shop.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »