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Holiday going wrong?

(165 Posts)
Straightomyhead Mon 20-Jan-20 02:00:53

So I'm on a holiday, long haul type, with someone who I've been friends with for quite a while, but our first time away together. Was really looking forward to it until we got here.

When we arrived we needed to pay a £100 deposit on our apartment, which we be refunded and the £12each for the taxi transfer. (I've converted the currently to pounds for ease) Turns out she only brought £12 in the currency with her! So I paid the deposit. She has taken out a small about of cash since but of course it keeps running out meaning I have to pay. (Today she mentioned she had no money after ordering lunch from a beach shack and would need to pay on card. Of course they wouldn't take card)

She also put in no planning for what we are doing, how to get around or any of the language. And just keeps saying for me to do it. Today she had data switched on on her phone and I didn't and still asked me to do it. Eg. Work out the bus route.

I don't know what to do. She now owes me around £70 in the currency. I don't want to lose this friendship but don't want to ruin the holiday.

Straightomyhead Mon 20-Jan-20 02:02:03

Also to add, this has come to a head today when she spend all my money on lunch as I had cash. And then didn't have money for the bus journey home so we were stuck far from our apartment in a country we don't know

Help!

Thehop Mon 20-Jan-20 02:03:27

“Right I need some more cash, I get it to you owing me £70 so far so if you draw that out with your spends before we go out today, it’ll save me a job!”

JuniperBeer Mon 20-Jan-20 02:07:53

Find nearest cash point. Take friend to said cash point. Withdraw enough money to cover a couple of days plus what she owes you.

JuniperBeer Mon 20-Jan-20 02:09:02

"Can we sort cash out on the way home to the hotel please to make sure you've got enough for the rest of the week"

EurghRedface Mon 20-Jan-20 02:10:01

Ask her for it, tell her you need it

puds11 Mon 20-Jan-20 02:33:25

She took £12?? What’s her reasoning? Just say no to paying from here on out.

Straightomyhead Mon 20-Jan-20 02:43:30

@puds11 She thought she could pay everything by card. Not in this country! With this exchange rates it's around 300 pesos so sounds more than it is.

Sparklfairy Mon 20-Jan-20 02:50:07

She's either astoundingly stupid or wilfully mugging you off or both

You need to take a firm hand and make sure she withdraws enough money. You must know roughly what you're spending in a day, so work out how much to get her to take out plus the £70 before this gets out of hand

StoppinBy Mon 20-Jan-20 03:20:36

Just have a friendly conversation with her.

Hey friend, I am out of cash because I have paid for both of us, how about we find an ATM so you can get the money you need out and pay me back at the same time. It's not rude to ask for your money back, it's not cheeky of her to assume that they take card but it is both rude and cheeky of her to not get cash out knowing what she knows now.

katy1213 Mon 20-Jan-20 03:22:35

She sounds either very young/naive or a CF. Tell her to get some cash and settle up. If she won't, I think I'd leave her to it for the rest of the holiday. Find something nice to do on your own and stop bailing her out.
Do you even believe her excuses? Does anybody really go to a currency exchange and get only £12?

puds11 Mon 20-Jan-20 04:32:03

@Straightomyhead so not even basic holiday research don’t 🤦‍♀️ Has she never travelled?

AgentJohnson Mon 20-Jan-20 05:22:21

* She's either astoundingly stupid or wilfully mugging you off or both.*

Tell her that she is responsible for her cashflow and stop lending her money.

GiveHerHellFromUs Mon 20-Jan-20 05:34:59

Tell her she owes you x and that it's costing approximately x amount each day so she needs to withdraw x amount for the rest of the week.

Then never go on holiday with her again.

LesLavandes Mon 20-Jan-20 05:55:34

Yes. You need to stop this right now. Friendly chat.

My concern is that she was planning to put everything on a credit card to pay off later and she may not have enough cash in her debit account card

Mummyoflittledragon Mon 20-Jan-20 06:08:51

If she was planning to put it all on credit card, she can withdraw cash on that card. Speak to her and pretend you’re reaching your overdraft limit so if she doesn’t step up, you can’t fund her any longer and she will go hungry. Mean it. And inform her she owes you x and therefore needs to withdraw that now.

sunnybean60 Mon 20-Jan-20 06:21:41

I'm pretty sure you won't want to go on holiday with her again. You can say you have reached your limit honestly (because you have reached your limit in patience with your friend) and can she withdraw some money out please. For years I have been going on holiday with my younger sister but because of her financial situation I have been doing some of what you, paying more out along the way and have been doing each year but when we returned from holiday she pays me in full. It's become an unspoken understanding but she is my sister.

Jokie Mon 20-Jan-20 06:27:43

What did she say when you said you had no money for the bus? How did you get back? I would definitely take her to an ATM and get the money back and be honest with her.

"Friend, it's not much of a holiday if I'm having to do all the legwork. I'd appreciate it if you could do x,y,z.".

Taking out £12 was an absolute joke.

Icanflyhigh Mon 20-Jan-20 06:30:35

Juat go to an ATM with her, take.some cash out, ask her to do the same, take out enough to pay you back what she owes you plus sufficient to not be freeloading off you for the rest of the holiday.

Straightomyhead Mon 20-Jan-20 06:59:57

Thanks all. We struggled to get back and I felt very vulnerable but a taxi managed to take us after we about an hour for a atm. The prombem with just going to an atm is there isn't many around, and not all accept foreign cards (no idea why)

I just think no research was done about where we were going before getting here. For example about getting around and places not taking card. (Also things like plug sockets!)

If anything she is much more travelled than me, but in Europe not South America but I like to know so much about a place before going.

Givemestrengthorgin Mon 20-Jan-20 07:04:49

There is an app called splitwise you use to record who buys what and then it divvies up the difference for you and tells you who owes what. Might be worth getting that so you are keeping tabs of who buys what and she knows you expect it to turn out equal in the end

GiveHerHellFromUs Mon 20-Jan-20 07:07:05

@Straightomyhead just ask at your hotel where the local ATM is and they'll be able to help.

Did she take any English money with her? They'll exchange that at the hotel too. The exchange rate just won't be as good as if she'd have done it before you travelled.

countrygirl99 Mon 20-Jan-20 07:12:41

If she has internet banking she can at least transfer over what she owes

myfuckingfreezer Mon 20-Jan-20 07:14:17

Right so you've now been to an atm - which of you took cash out? Because if it was her then problem solved but if it was you, then what the hell?!

Straightomyhead Mon 20-Jan-20 07:16:36

@GiveHerHellFromUs unfortunately we're not staying in a hotel but an apartment. An air bnb type.

In the morning when we get up, I'm going to make it clear than she owes me the money, plus I'm not lending her any more cash. It's upto her to take out what she needs when we go to the bus station.

I've no idea why she bought she little cash and why after the first day of no cards she thought it was ok to be somewhere with no cash.

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