I'm having slight problems at work and I'm not sure if I'm making this into something it isn't. I've been in a new job for about 2 months now. It's a very different environment to my previous jobs - I'm used to working in small teams whereas I'm now working with around 200 people (around 90% men).
From the very start I've had a lot of attention from male colleagues. This isn't a stealth boast - I consider myself relatively average looking and keep to myself, this is just due to it being a hugely male dominated workplace.
Until recently it's just been people trying to flirt at work (I always minimise conversation and focus on my work so most of them get the picture) which hasn't been a big deal but in the last week or two I've had a couple of people becoming more persistent. Several people have also added me on Facebook (which is fine, these weren't the same people who had been bothering me at work so I thought it was harmless) but a few of them have started messaging me in a way that makes me uncomfortable - messaging me late at night, commenting on my photos, complimenting my looks, asking why I don't have a boyfriend etc. I've even had someone asking me round multiple times to "chill and get to know each other" late at night. The thing that makes me most uncomfortable is that the worst ones are in their 40s and 50s while I'm in my mid 20s - somehow I'd find it a lot easier to deal with if we were similar ages!
I don't do anything to encourage any of this. I try to shut the messages down as politely as possible but some of them are very persistant and I just want it to stop. I'm wary of offending people as they have all worked there a lot longer than me and developed tight knit social groups (which I don't have) and as I'm still in my probation period I don't want to cause any trouble.
This all seems very minor now I've written it down but it's making me uncomfortable about going back into work on Monday. Am I overreacting? Should I just woman up and ignore it? Can I stop this without alienating myself or rocking the boat too much?
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Am I overreacting re unwanted attention at work?
54 replies
Kaltenzahn · 19/01/2020 11:38
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
178 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
4%
You are NOT being unreasonable
96%
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