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Dp stormed out after I questioned the bacon, don’t know what to do now

(402 Posts)
DoreenSamuel Sat 18-Jan-20 17:29:38

Dp and I both work ft and both do our fair share of looking after children and household chores. Food preparation is not really part of my allocation but I do more cleaning.

Anyway DP tends to do a lot of cooking on the weekend with a view to putting some things in the freezer and some things in the fridge for meals over the next few days.

He is a great cook and meals are always delicious. However I seem to have some irrational fear of food poisoning and I frequently ask questions about the food he’s making which seem to annoy him.

Today I noticed he was cooking a load of bacon and I was surprised as he’d already said he was making fish and chips for tea. I asked why he was cooking bacon and he said he was making stuffed jacket potatoes with cheese and bacon for a meal over the next few days. I apparently frowned and also said I didn’t think bacon would be safe to eat after being cooked and put in the fridge for a few days.

He became angry and told me to google it. He said he feels completely taken for granted and ‘nothing is ever good enough’.

He’s stormed out basically telling me to fuck off and make my own meals. He knows I can’t cook so I feel really upset he’s reacted in this way. I do feel bad because he’s spent almost the whole day meal planning to ensure we can’t eat home cooked healthy meals but I really don’t think his reaction was ok.

Aibu? If so how can I make this better, he’s not answering his phone.

OvenGlovesWillTearUsApart Sat 18-Jan-20 17:31:55

Can’t it just go in the freezer until the night before it’s needed?

PanamaPattie Sat 18-Jan-20 17:32:02

Learn to cook.

makingmammaries Sat 18-Jan-20 17:32:14

Maybe you need to sort out your fear as I can imagine that could be upsetting for the cook.

JaceLancs Sat 18-Jan-20 17:32:39

That’s it really

Minky35 Sat 18-Jan-20 17:32:51

I can see why he’s reacted like that to be honest. If it’s not to your standards you need to make your own, rather than badgering him and making out what he’s done isn’t good enough - it’s very ungrateful.
If I was you I’d text a heartfelt apology and then leave him alone.

Purpleartichoke Sat 18-Jan-20 17:33:10

You need to take responsibility for your own concerns. If you are worried about cooked bacon, then use the internet and check on the safety. You will find that it is perfectly safe.

I basically no longer cook for DH. He made “helpful suggestions” one too many times. It was either stop cooking for him or divorce and I’d rather just leave him to his own devices for food since he is a great guy aside from his picky eating.

isthisaname Sat 18-Jan-20 17:33:41

I can see why he's annoyed.

As long as food is fresh when cooked it will be ok for 3 days afterwards.

slipperywhensparticus Sat 18-Jan-20 17:34:07

Does he always over react when you ask a question?

Surely he can show you how to cook?

HavelockVetinari Sat 18-Jan-20 17:34:12

Jeez, learn to bloody cook, it's not hard to make simple pasta dishes or jacket potatoes! YABU and a bit ridiculous.

AuntImmortelle Sat 18-Jan-20 17:34:43

Yup. YABU.

Learn to cook.

I'd be pissed off if I was your DP.

keepingbees Sat 18-Jan-20 17:34:45

Can't cook or won't cook?

I don't think he's being unreasonable.

NoMorePoliticsPlease Sat 18-Jan-20 17:34:48

the bacon would be fine a few days in the fridge, apologise and leave the cook to make the decisions, be grateful many men wont cook

WheresMyChocolate Sat 18-Jan-20 17:35:07

If you want to eat, don't critise the chef. If you think you know bettern stick on pinny and crack on.

Tonii1985 Sat 18-Jan-20 17:35:38

You owe him an apology and the assurance you will no longer question his ability to not poison you. Thank him for doing so much to ensure you both have healthy home cooked meals. Then stop questioning him over the food.

I do a lot of what your husband does for my family and if my partner questioned it like you do I would be tempted to throw my lovingly prepared meals at him.

PristineCondition Sat 18-Jan-20 17:35:43

You don't cook, you don't get to wade in

pippitysqueakity Sat 18-Jan-20 17:35:49

So did you say what you ‘apparently ‘said?

FecktheBoss Sat 18-Jan-20 17:36:15

How long has he been cooking for you? Has he ever made you ill? If you cant cook, then you shouldn't be criticising those who cook for you.

Squirrelblanket Sat 18-Jan-20 17:36:26

It was a bit of an overreaction on his part but I can understand it given they you've said you frequently question him like this because you have an admittedly irrational fear of food poisoning. You need to get over that or cook yourself. The bacon would have been fine.

DoreenSamuel Sat 18-Jan-20 17:36:30

Ok yes I can see why he’s pissed off with me

Zaphodsotherhead Sat 18-Jan-20 17:37:03

If you can read, you can follow a recipe.

If you follow a recipe, you can cook.

I got utterly sick of constantly being questioned about food, how close to use by date was it, did it have cheese/cream/egg in it, was I SURE it didn't have cheese it, it tasted a bit cheesy...

No allergies, just a picky eater. Picky eater can cook their own food.

EvaHarknessRose Sat 18-Jan-20 17:37:21

This is your irrational fear. Own it. Yabu.

And I would kill to have someone meal prepping home cooked meals for me, do you know how much work and thought that takes, it's a massive act of love and you just pissed on it sad

OneFootintheRave Sat 18-Jan-20 17:37:21

YABVU - what you need to do now imo is, apologise sincerely and get out of the kitchen.

Can you not appreciate how annoying this must be to your DP? He hasn't poisoned you yet and you say the food is delicious then keep your beak out. grin

PristineCondition Sat 18-Jan-20 17:37:25

Surely he can show you how to cook?

Why should he? Shes a bloody adult! A woman wouldn't of got the same comment

PinkDaffodil2 Sat 18-Jan-20 17:37:29

I can see why he’s annoyed tbh - what steps are you taking to manage your anxiety and to learn to cook? It’s not fair on him at all if you’re not addressing those while using them as an excuse to act like this ‘frequently’.

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