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To have replied to my neighbours anonymous letter?

(128 Posts)
RhubarbBikini88 Fri 17-Jan-20 23:55:53

My neighbour moved in last year and although she doesn’t always say hello (her husband does) we are on reasonable terms, taking parcels in for one another, Christmas cards etc. This afternoon while we were out we were sent an anonymous printed letter addressed to our house number asking us to be more careful with our rubbish as they have had to pick up an advent calendar and a nappy in a bag. I understand that’s not pleasant for them, and we are sorry but it’s been very windy and the council recently swapped our bin for a smaller one which means it gets filled quicker, and our recycling is just in plastic tubs which makes it out of our control when it’s windy as it’s just in boxes!
We have a ring doorbell which records everything outside our house, so we checked to see who posted it and it was our neighbour who lives in the house next door.
I wrote a letter back which said “dear ..., thank you for making us aware of the rubbish situation. We will try to prevent this happening again but if it does please feel free to speak to us in person as although we are not very good at controlling our rubbish, I promise we are friendly people!” And signed it with our name and house number!
Have I been out of order?

OutFoxxedByABadger Fri 17-Jan-20 23:57:50

Ha! I like your style!

(Those rubbish facilities sound, well, rubbish!)

AmelieTaylor Fri 17-Jan-20 23:58:28

No that was more polite than I’d have managed in the circumstances!

CtrlU Fri 17-Jan-20 23:58:51

No I don’t think it’s out of order. She is probably wondering how you knew it was her though

ChinookPilotsGoVertical Fri 17-Jan-20 23:59:19

Nope! I would hope NDN feels awkward that you know it's her but learns the lesson to approach you directly but civilly.

Davespecifico Fri 17-Jan-20 23:59:45

No - sounds fine to me. Must have been difficult for them - having to pick up an advent calendar.

GlamGiraffe Sat 18-Jan-20 00:02:50

Not at all put of order. The points you have highlighted are perfectly reasonable explanations why the 2 items escaped from the bin. Fo they think you have suddenly started sprinkling rubbish around willy nilly as a new years resolution?🙄
If their bin is likely to be less full than yours, the next time you see them I'd be friendly, say you hope they got the note, thanks for letting you know. Explain the small bin is a problem and ask if you can use any extra space in theirs to stop it overflowing from yours. Also maybe put a brick on all the loose paper in the recycling basket or it will end up like confetti. Tell neighbour you think it might be an excellent idea to all do it. Youre being very constructive in resolving the problem and it shows they shouldn't have been all sneaky and weird with anonymous notes.

TimeTravellersHat Sat 18-Jan-20 00:08:31

Lol! Love your response however I do think you should do something about your bins. I’d be horrified at dirty nappies in my garden - gross! The neighbours shouldn’t have to alert you every time this happens.

Could you perhaps buy a bin lock so that even if it falls down in the wind then the contents won’t scatter?

Clymene Sat 18-Jan-20 00:28:59

The nappy was in a bag so it really isn't that gross @TimeTravellersHat

I like your style OP. The horror of an advent calendar!

Mamboitaliano Sat 18-Jan-20 00:33:39

Brilliant, OP. Perfectly handled.

MrsEricBana Sat 18-Jan-20 00:34:57

Well done, perfect! (And obvs get your rubbish under control!)

zoobincan Sat 18-Jan-20 00:46:04

I think that's brilliant OP.

Also, 'horrified' at a dirty nappy in a garden confused really now?

Vgbeat Sat 18-Jan-20 01:22:03

I think brilliantly handled. It may help break the ice a bit too if they were nervous of saying anything

lowlandLucky Sat 18-Jan-20 01:22:46

TimeTravellersHat Do you stay in all day every bin day ? If not and you were at work how would you know that rubbish had blown out of your bin ?

BillHadersNewWife Sat 18-Jan-20 01:25:39

YANBU I HATE anonymous letters. We had a number of them when we briefly lived in a very snotty street. The letters were picking on incredibly minor was obviously just a mean person with a grudge against the world.

It was unsettling though.

PhilCornwall1 Sat 18-Jan-20 04:45:49

* I’d be horrified at dirty nappies in my garden*

Really, what would you be if something really bad happened? hmm

Poorolddaddypig Sat 18-Jan-20 06:12:41

Good move!!! I’d have been tempted to be more sarky personally. I bet they’ll be mortified when they read it grin

iem0128 Sat 18-Jan-20 06:46:47

To be honest, I think this is very polite. At least, no physical confrontation in which you just don't know how either of you will react. I would send her an anonymous letter, explaining that it was unpleasant to come across a nappy ... but it was the wind or foxes. Nothing worse than being told in person about stray rubbish. I never leave my rubbish out throughout the night. The foxes will have a field day. I had rubbish blown across the road. I just put the bags back where they came from. Can't even complain as it was a public path.

You should live next to my ex-neighbour from hell! You'll realise how civilised yours is. She definitely has low threshold and I wouldn't like to sour relationship with neighbours. Really nasty ones damaged your properties .. As my in law said, we all would like to bulldoze our neighbours!

Els1e Sat 18-Jan-20 06:49:12

Brilliant reply. Well handled OP

Heeelllooo987171717 Sat 18-Jan-20 07:27:46

Really well handled! Bet she’s fuming as to how you know it’s her 🙈🙈

Her0utdoors Sat 18-Jan-20 07:34:19

Very nicely handled. Well done.

TimeToChangeNameAgain Sat 18-Jan-20 07:36:46

Are you in south Devon OP? We have exactly the same bin situation and it’s crazy. Just open plastic boxes for recycling and they get blown absolutely everywhere.

Scuzzymummy Sat 18-Jan-20 07:42:07

I once had a drunk neighbour from across the street stick a page 3 bit of newspaper to the outside of my window. No harm done he was obviously drunk. However my batshit neighbours next to me took it upon themselves to write an anonymous letter asking me to remove it with all the reasons why it was offensive. I knocked on Thier door apologised on behalf of the drunk guy, explained that it was on the OUTSIDE of my window and they could have just chucked it away. Bearing in mind I left for work at 6.45am and took it down as soon as I had seen it they must have seen it straight away.
They also sent me a bill for their cats get bill after it was stung by a wasps. Because they were convinced I had a wasps nest- I didn't! So then they called an exterminator to come to deal with it without my knowledge!!

Finfintytint Sat 18-Jan-20 07:43:41

We have open boxes for recycling. You can buy elasticated nets to put over them to stop rubbish blowing away.

charlestonchaplin Sat 18-Jan-20 07:57:56

It’s easy enough to prevent your recycling from flying about everywhere, unless it’s on the pavement for collection on bin day. In that case I would expect neighbours to be more tolerant. I don’t understand why you have a a dirty nappy in a bag hanging around though. I though the rule was that waste bins should shut? Otherwise what’s the point of giving you a smaller bin if you can just put a collection of extra bags out?

If you are struggling with a smaller bin, why not consider whether one of your neighbours may have spare space in their bin due to having a smaller household, and come to an arrangement with them? If you bag your waste properly so smells are minimised and there are no spillages, most people won’t mind sharing extra bin space. (What people don’t like is greedy bin hoggers and those who don’t bag up waste properly leading to unpleasant smells, mess and even maggots.)

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