How to deal with the CF who has been eating my granola

[JoyceTempleSavage]

Have recently moved into a larger office with about 50 new colleagues.

I have a tub of granola which I filled up last week and it’s now nearly empty. I’ve had it on my yoghurt maybe four times and it’s kept in the cereal cupboard inbetween times in its own special tub.

WIBU to top it up with 90% granola 10% used cat litter and keep my own granola in my locker instead?

[Jeezoh]

I’d top up with 100% cat litter and keep mine in my locker!

[Blacksackunderthetreesfreeze]

Defo keep yours in your locker anyway.

[OldEvilOwl]

Do it

[MelAndShoe]

[Cookie1989]

I realised someone used my whole jar of coffee but left the tiniest bit in the bottom... how desperate are some people that they feel the need to steal from other colleagues! Im locking everything away now. Yes I’d replace it with something awful like cat food, the dry ones 😅

[Latenightreader]

Do it, but put a label a couple of inches under the surface with a list of ingredients so they find it after a few bowls...

[Streamside]

Bring a ziplock packet for your own use each day.This happened to me recently and I left the empty container for a few days.It was miraculously refilled but communal granola isn't something I want.

[tweedler]

Ugh. I don't mind people asking if they can try something but when they eat the entire thing...

YANBU

[Toucan123]

Why would you put it in a communal cupboard anyway? I know people shouldn't take stuff that doesn't belong to them but sadly it's inevitable really. Definitely keep it in your locker from now on. And it's a "yes" from me re. the cat litter plan. I approve.

[Streamside]

I've my own cups and plates at work and everyone knows that but they're constantly used by others. Even worse when visitors come they will be given my Emma Bridgewater mug, not the stained stupid logo cup so they do know the difference.

[JesusInTheCabbageVan]

Well now you've suggested it, you have to do it.

Or this

[TopOftheNaughtyList]

Make your own communal granola with some hamster droppings, bird seed, cat litter etc. Keep the good stuff in your locker.

[worriedabouthealth]

Can you get a Realistic looking fake mouse or massive spider to put in it ?
Better than potentially making someone sick and still will give them a shock

[messolini9]

WIBU to top it up with 90% granola 10% used cat litter and keep my own granola in my locker instead?

Absolutely YABU OP, what the fuck are you thinking?
You forgot the 20% laxative choc pieces.

[HeidiHoNeighbour]

There was a lunch thief at my old office but they got a lesson from me (not on purpose).

I have a neurological disease and you have to try out lots of meds before you find one that’s the best for you.
I was on a med that was fat soluble and had to be taken at lunch time.
So I made myself a homemade guacamole and bacon sandwich laced with my meds, clearly marked Tupperware box with “Heidi’s medicated lunch, don’t eat!” also wrote “meds” in sharpie on the box.

Lunchtime came, box is empty. I go through bin, boss sees me do this and asks why. He refuses to believe food stealing happens and thinks I’m overreacting.
Until his PA is taken violently ill by vomiting guacamole and bacon over his desk...
I call her an ambulance because of the meds and her stomach is pumped.

She never returned, maybe she was sacked, maybe embarrassed or maybe dead (well, hopefully not dead but she did steal my sandwich)

So please put used litter in the box!

[Whynosnowyet]

Replace it with rabbit muesli...
Keep quiet until the bag is empty...

[Drum2018]

Put a load of linseed in it along with a few spoons of laxose - with a bit of luck they'll be running to the toilet.

[MulticolourMophead]

I recall a while back, another thread about lunch thieves had a poster who got her Indian MIL to make extra spicy pakora as bait for the thief. Who never touched her lunch again.

Go with the cat litter.

[LloydColeandtheCoconuts]

Jesus that post is hilarious!

And Heidi, yours is brilliant.

maybe dead (well, hopefully not dead but she did steal my sandwich)
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

[eminencegrise]

Heidi, whoa! I can't believe someone was stupid enough to eat your lunch after you labelled it medicated.

100% kitty litter, OP, don't waste granola.

One firm I worked in had a food thief. A friend's Diet Coke in a can, the only way she liked it, would disappear. Until she rubbed the rim with a Scotch bonnet chilli.

[SisterAgatha]

Heidi that is both hilarious and tragic! Who would steal a medicated lunch wtf is wrong with people?!

I’m another one who’s say go with laxative

[JoyceTempleSavage]

Heartened by the support. I suppose I could add in some Royal Canin cat food but on the other hand, why waste the good stuff?

In answer as to why I don’t just keep my tub in my locker already, it is a fun sized comedy locker with room for either granola tub or mini desk fan not both. In my menopausal state My colleagues can’t risk the fan walking.

@HeidiHoNeighbour you are hardcore. I salute you.

[makingmammaries]

Add 50% coarse sawdust and you’ll soon identify the thief

[MsScribbles]

I put some plastic bugs (worm, centipede, fly) from my kids toys into my Alpen at work so they would be poured out with the cereal into the thief's bowl. Petty, perhaps. But on principle I don't feel I should have to keep it in my locker.

[AlpacaGoodnight]

My first thought was rabbit droppings! Think in reality I would add loads of dried chilli!