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AIBU to be furious with the gift my daughter received for a secret santa present

(169 Posts)
Oli001 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:10:04

Y7 - daughter came home from private girls school saying they have to buy a secret santa present - names out a hat - she then told me the girls were asking each other what they wanted and who were giving to who etc . We are NOT "rich" but she has complained that they are all "posh". I explained the gesture behind this event and I gave her a £15.00 budget which she spent the lot (no problem). Gifts were given out today (although others were given gift since day 2). She came home with her gift - it was a £2.00 squishy sticker - is that taking the piss??!! or am I BUB?

Singlenotsingle Thu 12-Dec-19 17:11:48

Does it really matter? Have you voted?

HugeAckmansWife Thu 12-Dec-19 17:12:11

They ought to have been given guidance on how much to spend. Nothing you can really do on this one but could mention it next year casually to the teacher.

SissySpacekAteMyHamster Thu 12-Dec-19 17:12:22

Was there a spending cap of £2 on the secret Santa she forgot to tell you about?

HollowTalk Thu 12-Dec-19 17:13:07

Wasn't there an agreement about how much to spend?

Designerenvy Thu 12-Dec-19 17:13:51

Our school always set a limit . Just ask for that next year .

needsomehelptoday Thu 12-Dec-19 17:14:28

What was the amount they were to spend?

Secret Santa amongst a big group of kids s a sure fire way to cause anonymous bullying Tbh.

What age is year 7?

halcyondays Thu 12-Dec-19 17:14:50

They must have been given a suggested amount to spend?
£15 is a lot, when my dds have done it at school or anywhere, it’s been £5.

WhatshouldIdo123 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:15:00

Furious? Over a kids secret Santa gift? Can I have your life please hmm

xyzandabc Thu 12-Dec-19 17:15:00

You gave her a budget.

Was there not a budget set by whoever set up the secret Santa? Usually everyone gets a guide on how much to spend so they are all similar.

My dd yr 8 is doing one with her class but they all know the budget is £4-6.

Willow2017 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:16:21

Singlenotsingle
People can vote without leaving a post. Ok probably hasn't voted a bunch of times for herself!
It's a crap present op no 2 days about it. Of course people will.pile in saying she should be grateful for any crap she gets...
Nothing you can do.about it however.

GrannyBags Thu 12-Dec-19 17:16:43

Was it organised by the school or did they organise it themselves? As a Y7 teacher I had to talk them out of this every year. Always causes trouble!

Willow2017 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:17:28

OK, not OK!
WAYS not days!!!
Bloody auto correct.

KTheGrey Thu 12-Dec-19 17:17:34

But Secret Santa always has a budget and you spend exactly that. Was it done by the teachers or the kids?

BlackSwanGreen Thu 12-Dec-19 17:18:37

It should have been made clear how much to spend - £5 is the norm at my DC's school and my workplace. £2 is stingy but £15 is over generous.

katy1213 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:18:44

You were daft for giving her that much to spend on it!

Whattodoabout Thu 12-Dec-19 17:20:07

Secret Santa should have a budget. If it did then the £2 girl is a massive CF but then, they’re 11/12 so probably spent the surplus on crap for themselves grin.

GooseOrTurkey Thu 12-Dec-19 17:20:09

Does it matter that it’s a private school? confused

sue51 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:20:41

If the school organised it I would imagine there was a budget. Your daughter might have missed the memo on that.

delineateddelinquent Thu 12-Dec-19 17:22:03

I see your point op.

Someone cheaped out on your DD.

I’m sure there are are similar threads when someone spends money on a present to get nothing or very little in return

It’s a bit insulting

AlexaShutUp Thu 12-Dec-19 17:23:11

The school should have set a budget. For school secret Santa, I'd have thought £5 was about right. £15 seems excessive. £2 is a bit stingy.

It's just the luck of the draw though, isn't it? No point in being furious.

ForeverBubblegum Thu 12-Dec-19 17:24:10

It is a crap present, but you also seem to have over spent on the gift she gave, which may be effecting your expectations.

Normally the would be a spending limit of around £5, so everyone's present is a bit crap.

FruitcakeOfHate Thu 12-Dec-19 17:24:41

Good way to learn the lesson that all Secret Santas are absolute shit and decline them in the future. Just feeds the landfill more tat. Better to give money to charity.

lovemenorca Thu 12-Dec-19 17:25:32

You could show your daughter how to handle situations like this
Shrug it off, no big deal really. Focus on more important stuff

Or you could get furious, worked up and, well, come across as a little unhinged.

At the moment you fall in to the latter camp

NewName73 Thu 12-Dec-19 17:25:49

You should not have given her nearly as much money.

I wouldn't spend £15 on an adult Secret Santa.

The private school thing is irrelevant.

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