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AIBU?

to think I can still get half (or more than half) of the house?

67 replies

bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 14:42

Split up with my ex in march. Not married and have a 1 year old who he hasn't seen due to domestic abuse. Both names on the mortgage. He's been living there and paying the mortgage solely for the past year. I have not contributed. Am I right in thinking that I am still entitled to half even though I haven't been paying it or living there? My name is on it and I own 50%. His solicitor arguing that I am entitled to far less. I don't have solicitor at the moment as I have no money. Usually I would look at doing what is fair but as he was incredibly abusive, emotionally, physically and sexually, I couldn't care less and want to get as much as I can for my son. Can't contact him directly as there's a restraining order in place. Can anyone advise or speak from experience?

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 14:44

He also hadn't had it valued and is just offering me back what I put in. I think he needs to value it and give me what I would get if we re sold, as it's likely gone up in value!

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SillyLittleBiscuit · 11/12/2019 14:44

I moved out of the marital home (and stopped contributing to it) 7 years before I got half of the equity.

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Quartz2208 · 11/12/2019 14:46

yep 50% us your (perhaps marginally minus the money he has put in since you left)

Try to see if you can get an appointment to get a letter sent

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Sirzy · 11/12/2019 14:50

You have been ousted from the family home, therefore you will probably be eligible to claim occupational rent from him, so what you are legally owed for him having rented your half of the house from you will most likely balance out what you owe in mortgage payments. So unless he has paid for any big bits of maintainance work since the split then our should be a 50/50

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 14:52

Thank you. There's not much money in the house. Probably about £20k but even £1000 is a lot for me at the moment

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popcorndiva · 11/12/2019 14:56

Depends how the house was bought? Tenants in common? Was there any stipulations written about the deposit. Who put down the deposit?

Does he wish to stay and buy you out?

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Havaina · 11/12/2019 14:57

You need to get your own valuation. Could you apply for legal aid? Maybe make an appt with CAB?

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 15:04

Not entitled to legal aid (funnily enough because I own a house). We out down £6000 each. 50/50.

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HumousWhereTheHeartIs · 11/12/2019 15:07

Also it depends which country you are in. Your legal rights and legal aid rules will differ depending where in the UK you are

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user1471462428 · 11/12/2019 15:08

Won’t getting the money from the house stop you claiming benefits? You might be better off not having it!

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 15:11

I would rather have the money so I can buy a small flat or house of my own. I'm not worried about benefits. Bring able to buy a house that I can one day leave to my son is my priority at the moment.

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Havaina · 11/12/2019 15:12

Could OP take the money from the house and put in a savings account for her DC?

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thecalmorchid · 11/12/2019 15:12

Yes you are. Half of the repayments he makes are to compensate you for not being able to live there. As it's your house too. He is in effect paying his half and then renting your half from you by paying the total mortgage.

This was explained to me very clearly by a family court judge.

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 15:13

I would use it to buy a run down place and my dad (a builder) is going to do it up for me. I would live with my dad until it's fixed up.

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thecalmorchid · 11/12/2019 15:13

@Sirzy explained it better.

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HollowTalk · 11/12/2019 15:13

The fact is that he behaved so badly that you had to leave. Obviously you weren't going to continue to pay half of the mortgage when you weren't able to live there. You had to pay for somewhere to live yourself, presumably.

Find your own solicitor and make sure he/she is as tough as your ex's.

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 15:15

I can't afford a solicitor. Genuinely, I have nothing month to month.

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MummyJasmin · 11/12/2019 15:23

Some solicitors offer a free initial consultation - book onto one of those. You can find out what is rightfully yours.

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ReanimatedSGB · 11/12/2019 15:24

It might be worth having a chat with Women's Aid, at least to get a recommendation for a solicitor who is DV-aware.

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Vellichor · 11/12/2019 15:25

Some branches of Women’s Aid have solicitors associated with them who offer free advice for women who have been affected by domestic abuse. My local branch also has law students offering free clinics.

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LemonTT · 11/12/2019 15:28

At this stage you don’t really need a solicitor. Reply to the offer from his solicitor confirming that you are expecting 50 % of the equity based on current valuation. Confirm that your are offsetting fees due from his occupation against the ownership costs. Ask them to provide valuations.

Then wait to here what they say.

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MarieG10 · 11/12/2019 15:34

Can you not get legal aid due to domestic abuse...I'm not an expert on that?

If you can't get legal aid, don't waste your money on a solicitor as it will cost you far more than anything you potentially receive. Represent yourself and get guidance from a legal centre or equivalent. What might be a strategy is refuse to cooperate and he risk having you on the deeds for years and having to give you half...he will probably want you off the deeds post general election as there could be a big property bounce post general election.

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bakabakabeyond · 11/12/2019 15:34

What if the house comes back valued at less than what we bought it for? That's a risk! He would love that :(

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Ponoka7 · 11/12/2019 15:34

Do you have a local Domestic Violence service? They know their stuff on all matters.

They can sign post you to the lowest cost solicitors etc. It sounds as though you will need legal imput, anyway.

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LeekMunchingSheepShagger · 11/12/2019 15:34

Yes you can get half.

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