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Nursery manager thinks my husband is "confused"

(47 Posts)
Severa Mon 09-Dec-19 13:32:32

Last week when I dropped my son off at pre-school the manager says that the children on government funded hours can't come in due to staff shortages, annoying but this happens quite a lot there, but she also says that her colleague called my husband and spoke to him about it and that they'd already rearranged another time for him to make up the hours. I think this is very strange as I was just with him and he didn't mention anything. When I get back I check both our phones and there's no calls from the nursery. My husband is there and says they haven't spoken to him at all.
I asked the manager about it today and she doubles down and says her colleague definitely called and spoke to him, and says maybe dad is confused. She's acting like he's suffering with dementia or something. I was at home during the time they said they called as well, about half an hour before, she says. She just wouldn't listen to logic — her colleague had called my husband and spoken to him. iMad.

SpudleyLass Mon 09-Dec-19 13:34:46

Sounds as if they're the confused ones!

Louloulovesyou Mon 09-Dec-19 13:41:11

What...they send the government funded kids home when they are short staffed! That is very odd, it doesn't sound like they are very organised. My children have been to three nurseries and non of them did that. I think you need a new nursery!

Severa Mon 09-Dec-19 13:47:59

It's a bit annoying but as I'm a stay at home mum it's not a big deal to me if I have to keep my son home. He's only there 3 hours a day. If we were both working then we'd have missed a lot of work by now since it happens quite a lot. The thing is the nursery is like 30 seconds from our house and neither of us drive so it's just so damn convenient to go there. We've not had any other problems with them and our son is very happy there, I'm just shocked they'd essentially accuse me and my husband of lying/being crazy.

SleepwalkingThroughLife Mon 09-Dec-19 13:50:17

Have they got your phone number linked with you, rather than with a different parent?

mindutopia Mon 09-Dec-19 13:50:22

I would be genuinely concerned that a nursery that is managing its staffing this badly is managing a lot of other things also very badly (they should have extra staff they can call in in case of staff sickness or other absences, just like other nurseries do).

Topseyt Mon 09-Dec-19 13:52:36

Sounds like the nursery staff are the confused ones.

Bluntness100 Mon 09-Dec-19 13:52:37

Clearly they spoke to another dad. I'd also be concerned about the total disorganisation, sending kids home, speaking to thr wrong parents etc.

Bluebutterfly90 Mon 09-Dec-19 13:53:00

You can say that you have no record of any phone call on his phone. I suggest perhaps bringing in DH and having him tell her.
Also, I've worked in several nurseries over the years and I've never heard of the government funded children being sent home in event of staff shortages, seems weird and almost discriminatory to me.
I know they don't make as much from government funded kids, but I didnt think they could do that. Dunno if any other childcare staff can enlighten me, if there are any on here.

Severa Mon 09-Dec-19 13:54:35

That's interesting; I assumed it was like this for other nurseries as well, but evidently not. They do let you make up the hours another day and add in a lunch which he wouldn't normally get. So this Friday he'll be there for 7 hours in all, so I don't mind since I'm at home anyway. But if I was working then I can't imagine the stress at having to constantly tell my work I can't come in because of childcare. If they're doing that to people then that's really not good.

LissJas Mon 09-Dec-19 14:01:52

So govt funded kids deserve less than the privately funded ones?! That cannot be right!

merryhouse Mon 09-Dec-19 14:05:30

This nursery is a terrible place to use for childcare.

However, as you say, that's not in itself a problem for you. It's worrying as others have said in that it shows a level of disorganisation.

The thing I'd be really hot on following up is that they've obviously got the wrong details on the system. This time it's just been the wrong child they've told not to come in. What will the next call be about?

Go and insist they check your details, by ringing both your phones while you're present. Then if there's an error, kick up a stink.

SquareAsABlock Mon 09-Dec-19 14:05:44

That's utterly odd. Is your child 3? Have you considered a primary preschool instead of private? At least that way there wont be a chance of discriminating between the private and Gov-funded children.

LissJas Mon 09-Dec-19 14:08:40

Your hours are your hours - it's down to the nursery to make sure they're properly staffed. Families can't function on that ridiculous premise! Imagine saying to your boss "Oh I can't come in today but I'll make up on different days." I thjnk - "Er - no!" Would be the response.

I appreciate that you're a SAHM, but lots of other parents aren't!

CandyflossKid Mon 09-Dec-19 14:09:16

I would check with the Local Authority about this - the nursery should not be claiming any of the funded hours if they are refusing care for your child

VeniVidiVoxi Mon 09-Dec-19 14:13:44

Ask them what numbers they have on file for you. Better to check because they need to reach you in am emergency and they might have recorded the wrong number.

basicbitch16 Mon 09-Dec-19 14:15:33

This would wind me right up. Is there another child that you know of with the same name as you DC?

Severa Mon 09-Dec-19 14:17:12

I think I will take my husband with me when I go to pick him up today. Tell them I'm concerned they're talking to someone they think is him about our son. I personally think they've just glossed over our names when they were calling around, as they usually phone me instead. I just want them to admit it. But if they really have got the wrong number for us then that's unacceptable.
As for the government hours and getting dumped, it is discriminatory and I don't agree with it but for me and mine I think we're just going to stick with them. My son is going to school soon enough anyway.

crikeycrumbsblimey Mon 09-Dec-19 14:20:42

They sound very dodgy!

Billben Mon 09-Dec-19 14:20:43

So govt funded kids deserve less than the privately funded ones?! That cannot be right!

How did you work that out?🤔 OP clearly states that they let her make up the hours on another day.

OP, I wouldn’t trust the people running this nursery if I was you. I know it’s convenient for you but it just sounds fishy to me.

CharDee Mon 09-Dec-19 14:23:30

I'm a nursery manager. If we're short staffed I am in the room and we use bank staff or a local agency if needed. Turning children away because if staff shortages should be the last resort and should not be a regular thing. We are a small independent setting with just enough staff to cover one or two people being off sick and I have never had to do this.

The local authority needs to hear about this as they are paying for your child's place and the nursery are not providing it. If it's a nursery that is part of a bigger chain I would be speaking to head office about this too asking about how they plan for staff sickness and holidays as whatever they do is not working.

Also ask to see your child's file with contact details in as they clearly have the wrong number and in case of an emergency they need to have the right details

WooMaWang Mon 09-Dec-19 14:24:21

All the 3 and 4 year olds are 'government funded' to some extent though. It's just that some parents pay for the rest of the time and others just use their free hours.

I'd say the nursery are in very dodgy ground sending the children just in free hours home/refusing care, even if they offer it at some other time instead.

Equanimitas Mon 09-Dec-19 14:26:22

It sounds like they are making money out of the funded hours. Although they offer alternative hours for children who they won't take at the usual time, for most parents that won't work as they need care at specific times, so the nursery ends up getting paid for care they haven't given.

NotQuiteUsual Mon 09-Dec-19 14:28:01

I can't imagine a nursery telling families there's not enough staff today so you can't come in. What a terribly run place. I've worked in lots of preschools and nurseries and there's been lots of setting the manager up with her laptop on the corner so we meet ratio, or having committee members crb checked for use as emergency cover. Pairing up with other local settings to share staff and using agency staff in a real emergency. But never ever turning kids away. That's unthinkable to me and most child care providers.

EvenMoreFuriousVexation Mon 09-Dec-19 14:39:08

Ask the manager to pull the phone records (give her notice of this, at least half a day as she may have to contact the telephony provider if she can't scroll back on the history of the staff member who allegedly called.)

Check the contact details on file.

Showing the manager your call history probably won't help since individual calls can be deleted from your handset and she sounds deluded as fuck.

It may be convenient in terms of travel but they sound utterly chaotic and I think I'd be looking for somewhere new.

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