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To be fuming

(159 Posts)
Fuming123 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:15:29

For a bit of back story a relative came by today with their kids to go out somewhere so they could play . Anyway it was all ok, kids had fun etc but this child in particular played up a bit as usual. Now tonight I've done my childs story and everything ready for bed, teeth etc. Went to put them in bed and what do I find?
The safety gate that was on so tight even I would have struggled to get it off has been yanked off literally. I noticed at 7 so I start trying to sort it out and it wouldn't go on nearly as tight or shut at all so was now unsafe. This gate had been left open all day and the kid in question went Into the room so it was definitely them as mine is small enough for stairs to still be a very real danger if they wake in the night. ( Do have a stairgate but don't feel right having no bedroom gate)
It would have taken no small amount of actually trying to yank it off to actually do it , and the fact they succeeded shows it was malicious intent.
So now I am fuming because of the risk to my child and the fact they even thought to do it ( for contexr they have a sibling of similar age to mine so should know better) . Now I am having to sit up stairs all night down the hall to make sure of their safety because I need the person who originally put the gate on to come and redo it which obviously they can't tonight at this time.
Luckily I always have a drink bottle upstairs but I haven't eaten my tea yet, and while I don't mind not having it if it means my child is safe it's besides the point.
I shouldn't be having to worry about my child's safety over the stairs if the kid hadn't yanked it off in the first place. To further more make me angry apparently I'm over reacting by been fuming and it's something all kids do!!

Fuming123 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:18:39

This child is ten btw so knows right from wrong.

Stephminx Sat 07-Dec-19 21:21:43

Sorry - are you saying they pulled off one of two any gates ?

UtuNorantiPralatongsThirdEye Sat 07-Dec-19 21:22:24

I'm confused, is there a working stair gate on the stairs? If so, why not just go and have your dinner?

I would be pissed off though.

sweeneytoddsrazor Sat 07-Dec-19 21:22:55

Close all the other doors except bedroom door shut the stairgate and come downstairs. You really don't need to sit upstairs.

Bargebill19 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:23:13

You are NOT over reacting. Your home, your rules. Your property should be respected. If it was an accident, then they should have the manners to admit to what happened and apologise. At least then you would have known earlier.
The parent should offer to pay for the damage. Their response smacks of guilt, and they are trying to revert the blame back to you, by saying you are over reacting.

IndecentFeminist Sat 07-Dec-19 21:25:43

There's a stair gate? So what do you think is going to happen? You're being very dramatic. It's annoying when this sort of thing happens, but really not worth camping out with an emergency water bottle and missing your dinner over. hmm

SinglePringle Sat 07-Dec-19 21:27:40

What Sweeney said.

You are massively overreacting to a kid (the ten year old) taking off a baby gate.

rhubarbcrumbles Sat 07-Dec-19 21:27:47

What the child did is wrong but YABVU and a vbit of a martyr to sit upstairs when there is a stair gate - just what do you think your child is going to do?

NerrSnerr Sat 07-Dec-19 21:27:46

Is your child asleep? How often do they usually wake up over night? Do they try to scale the stair gates and that's why they need 2?

Unless your child has from for waking up and climbing over the gates I would g9 downstairs and have tea. I'm sure you'll hear them if they're up.

Fuming123 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:29:00

My child has a habit of wandering blindly in the night and freaks out if I'm not there immediately so the safety gate on the room was perfect to stop him . Tbh I don't like the stair gate one, seems a bit more flimsy made and I don't trust it whereas the room one was totally solid. The bedroom is a lindam gate so no way to open it wheras the stair one is a catch that i think isn't as good

SinglePringle Sat 07-Dec-19 21:29:09

If it helps, the last time I was ‘fuming’ was about 10 years ago when someone lied about me. Get a grip OP. Life is too short.

Lex234 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:30:04

If you are worried about the child coming out of the room could you not move the stair gate to the bedroom door temporarily?

RJnomore1 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:30:17

You are not being unreasonable that your home should not have been damaged but there is no need to play the bloody martyr when you still have a functioning stair gate. Go eat your Dinner and can the dramatics.

Wildorchidz Sat 07-Dec-19 21:30:39

How old is your child?

RJnomore1 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:31:13

Your child shouting for you for two minutes while you go up the stairs is not going to do them the slightest damage.

TrainspottingWelsh Sat 07-Dec-19 21:31:18

Yanbu to be annoyed that a child old enough to know better has damaged your gate. It's infuriating when badly behaved dc cause unnecessary work and break stuff.

Yabu to overreact about the inconvenience. You have a stair gate, so I'm not understanding why you need to sit upstairs all night. By all means you are perfectly entitled to want a door gate too, but hardly necessary. Or if you have some unusual reason to actually need one, just put it back on yourself now, even if it's just an untidy temporary job.

Fuming123 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:31:25

My child is a very light sleeper. About an hour and a half after going to bed he starts to wake in intervals.

pictish Sat 07-Dec-19 21:31:42

Why on earth are you sitting up there? What overkill! Pull yourself together and go and eat fgs.

WhenISnappedAndFarted Sat 07-Dec-19 21:31:55

You've got every right to be annoyed however you've got a working baby gate and the fact you aren't going to go downstairs to have your dinner is ridiculous.

newbingepisodes Sat 07-Dec-19 21:32:04

Annoyed about gate being damaged yeh that's reasonable but you have two gates anyway and you want to sit outside their room all night. That's a bit OTT! If the gate that's still working stops then from falling down the stairs then what's the problem. What's going to happen if they come out of their room? I've never had a gate on my kids rooms. If they come out their room they will either go into our main bedroom or one of the three other bedrooms which are empty. What's the issue here I'm confused? They aren't going to fall down the stairs.

NerrSnerr Sat 07-Dec-19 21:32:30

Just go and eat. Are you going to stay awake and sit in their room all night?

Orchidflower1 Sat 07-Dec-19 21:34:01

You have a stair gate over the stairs which is the important bit. It’s very annoying they you’ll have to get a new gate but most people generally only have one gate. If you’re really worried could you move one from say kitchen door to bedroom door?

How old is you lo?

sweeneytoddsrazor Sat 07-Dec-19 21:34:07

Well then if you wont leave him uostairs alone make him up a little camp bed downstairs. Yes its infuriating something has been broken but you are acting wildly ott

Todaythiscouldbe Sat 07-Dec-19 21:34:11

You are hugely overreacting. Absolutely ridiculous.

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