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People making me feel bad for my disposable income

(255 Posts)
vilnerf Mon 02-Dec-19 17:25:43

I've just started the 2nd year of my grad scheme (banking). Luckily I have been sent to an office that is very close to my childhood home for all of my placements. Petrol and phone are really my only bills.

I take home roughly £2400 after tax. Friends, colleagues and family are consistently making digs at me i.e I should be the one to pay or "how can you be skint". Also, I don't buy a tonne of stuff but prefer to buy decent quality products. I recently bought a designer bag (wasn't as expensive as you might expect) but received a lot of judgy comments.

Also, I've been able to save a lot and will be able to buy a house in the not too distant future. And literally no one is excited for me. Trust me I'm not rubbing my good fortune in other people's faces but it's starting to make me feel bad.

The other day at after-work drinks my colleague felt it necessary to announce to all the grads visiting from another city that I live at home and don't have to pay rent.


I worked my tits off to prepare for my assessment centre as I knew working for my company would not only be an amazing professional move but a great financial one also.

BlanketTime Mon 02-Dec-19 17:27:02

They’re jealous, that’s their problem, not yours.

Waxonwaxoff0 Mon 02-Dec-19 17:28:47

That's bloody rude of them.

Waxonwaxoff0 Mon 02-Dec-19 17:30:04

Although do you moan to them about being skint? Because that might rub people up the wrong way.

Alarae Mon 02-Dec-19 17:30:05

YANBU, people are just twats sometimes.

I would just steer the conversation away from anything financially related as they may be envious/jealous and as a result make those sorts of comments.

I probably take home slightly more than you and I used to get these comments from my sisters saying I was 'loaded' etc. They were jovial, but it is still annoying to hear.

I don't discuss finances with anyone now and don't get the comments.

RedRec Mon 02-Dec-19 17:32:19

Why don't you pay rent?

LolaSmiles Mon 02-Dec-19 17:32:37

They're being rude.

Some people have nothing better to do than speculate about other people's finances and for some reason it seems fair game for the complainers in the world to make digs at anyone who might have anything a little better than them

ginghamstarfish Mon 02-Dec-19 17:32:42

How do they know how much you earn and whether you contribute to your family's bills?

Merryoldgoat Mon 02-Dec-19 17:33:01

Why are you complaining about being broke if you aren’t?

Yes, they’re jealous but you’re being disingenuous saying you’re broke to people who actually might be.

vilnerf Mon 02-Dec-19 17:33:18

Although do you moan to them about being skint?

Not really - a couple of the people I work with love to go to some REALLY expensive bars and restaurants and I will say I can't afford it (savings are automatically taken out of my account on payday). I do my best to be discreet and sensitive.

TestingTestingWonTooFree Mon 02-Dec-19 17:33:46

how can you be skint?

geordiejock Mon 02-Dec-19 17:33:49

None of their business. I would get a massive wedge of 20 pound notes and wave them at anyone who mentions your money and shout "LOADS OF MONEY" like the old Harry Enfield character.

vilnerf Mon 02-Dec-19 17:34:06

Why don't you pay rent? My parents want me to save

TestingTestingWonTooFree Mon 02-Dec-19 17:34:25

Cross post, say no thanks you’re saving hard/too tight to go.

Namechange322 Mon 02-Dec-19 17:34:48

Presumably you are telling them your salary? If so then why?

It’s best not to talk about money with friends for this reason - comparison is the thief of joy

SquareAsABlock Mon 02-Dec-19 17:34:50

I'm sure you're not intending this to come over as a stealth brag, but its difficult to feel that sorry for your first world problems. You're a mixture of lucky and hard working, people will make comments (as rude as it is). Laugh it off and just remember that you are luckier than many people around you - no rent, abilities to save and buy nice things, assume no dependents....

Are you telling people you're skint, or are they assuming because you wont cover their drinks and such, by the way? Because the former would make me pull a face in all honesty, I'd wonder where £2400 a month went with minimal bills, though it would be none of my business obviously.

Baguetteaboutit Mon 02-Dec-19 17:35:12

Ofgs. Toughen up.

ghostyslovesheets Mon 02-Dec-19 17:35:16

why no rent - don't you contribute?

ArnoldWhatshisknickers Mon 02-Dec-19 17:35:25

The other day at after-work drinks my colleague felt it necessary to announce to all the grads visiting from another city that I live at home and don't have to pay rent.

That's just silly, living with your parents doesn't mean you don't pay your fair share of bills etc.

Honestly, have they never heard of dig money? Do they think you're aren't contributing? How pampered are they if they think living at home means rent free grin

Tableclothing Mon 02-Dec-19 17:35:28

Stop discussing your money with people.

I've been able to save a lot and will be able to buy a house in the not too distant future. And literally no one is excited for me.

You are not being as discreet as you think.

vilnerf Mon 02-Dec-19 17:36:11

How do they know how much you earn we earn the same as we're on the same scheme. At the start fo my scheme I was explicitly asked if I pay rent by another new starter - naively I responded honestly.

Sexnotgender Mon 02-Dec-19 17:36:12

They’re rude and jealous.

How you spend or save your money is nobody’s business but yours.

SunniDay Mon 02-Dec-19 17:36:54

Hi OP,
You shouldn't feel guilty about your success but you should pay your way. You say petrol and phone are your only bills so you are not paying rent & board. Unless your parents are quite rich and have more disposable income than you (which must be around 2k a month after their bilks/mortgage/food) then I think you should be paying a generous amount- at least a third of all outgoings assuming the only working adults are your parents and you.

WorraLiberty Mon 02-Dec-19 17:37:04

Why are you telling people your personal business?

I would have no idea whether my colleagues paid rent or not confused

ArnoldWhatshisknickers Mon 02-Dec-19 17:37:07

My parents want me to save

Missed this before I posted. Surely you save as well as contributing?

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