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One pair of trousers and two tops

(55 Posts)
SplashingAroundTown Thu 21-Nov-19 12:33:01

AIBU to ask for help with clothes?

I have one pair of black trousers and two black tops. Two bras. Lots of pants and socks. One coat. That’s it.

My clothes fit into a small drawer.

I’m 5’2 and 16 stone. Losing weight slowly and carefully. But nothing looks good so I wear my “uniform” of clothes that look ok and are comfortable. I wash the trousers every couple of nights and wear a clean top every day.

I’m realising that some people just won’t believe this. Honestly, I find it crazy myself.

I do have more clothes but they’re too small. Probably about a dozen tops? A dress or two?

I just don’t know where to shop, what to buy, how not to waste money when I am getting slimmer slowly but surely. And also, everything looks awful on me because I’m so big anyway.

Help? I’m at work and running back into a meeting but I promise to check back ASAP

Is there anyone else who wears basically the same things day in and day out? Am I a total freak? (Perhaps don’t answer that!)

DeadBod Thu 21-Nov-19 12:41:22

How long have you had this wardrobe? I'm presuming that you wear the same clothes for work, weekends and going out.

Havaina Thu 21-Nov-19 12:41:55

You’re not a freak!

I sympathise as I have put on 3 stones over the past 4 years and have gone from size 10 to 14, not approaching size 16.

I don’t like how a lot of clothes look on my body but I had to realise that I am a size 14 now and need to embrace it. If I go back to size 10 then I will treat myself to a new wardrobe (it’s never going to happen!)

It will do wonders for your confidence to have different clothes and styles that fit you. Please don’t hide in your uniform, go out shopping and find some great new clothes.

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea Thu 21-Nov-19 12:41:58

I don't think there's anything intrinsically wrong with wearing the same clothes every day, as long as they are clean and not shabby.

If you don't want to waste (too much) money while you are losing weight you can buy things from charity shops or eBay.

Or buy a few scarves or other accessories.

SplashingAroundTown Thu 21-Nov-19 12:45:47

I wear the same clothes for everything. My office is super casual. If I am at a dinner or party I wear the same clothes with heels. I have turned down a lot of social invitations in the last few years because I really have nothing to wear.

“Go out shopping” is tricky because the clothes I like don’t fit me and everything looks awful.

Sort of glad I’m not alone! Sorry for anyone in the same boat though. I look at walk in wardrobes and wonder what I’d do with them!

crochetmonkey74 Thu 21-Nov-19 13:05:40

I only have 10 items of clothing in my wardrobe at the moment so no, you are not a freak- I find it liberating to use so few things- I had a big wardrobe that I have culled down and stored away Summer stuff etc so I would say make a list of priorities- A warm jumper for example, or a flippy oversized shirt (whatever you fancy) and look in charity shops . I am a size 20 so sometimes it can be slim pickings but I mostly find lovely things. I'm wearing a Next leopard print jumper today actually that was a charity shop find- with the label still on.
I think a nice fabric plain shirt with a big necklace could be nice with your current trousers for going out (I always find trousers the hardest to find)

Losingthechubrub Thu 21-Nov-19 13:49:42

The size of your wardrobe isn't important as long as you're happy in your clothes, but when you're turning down invitations because you have nothing to wear, then that's really not ok. Please don't put things off until you lose weight, you deserve to feel good about yourself, whatever size you are. The advice above about charity shop/Ebay shopping is good, maybe try a few things on in a store to find a style that suits you, then keep an eye our for those things at a cheaper price. I'm bigger than you, believe me, I would LOVE to be 16 stone, and I swear by tunic tops with jeans/decent leggings, skater dresses, wrap dresses etc. Nothing that cuts me in half across the middle, as that makes me look wider

Lhastingsmua Thu 21-Nov-19 14:01:41

My biggest concern would be your clothes deteriorating if you wear and wash them that often. The same black trousers/tops being washed every 2 days may lose colour or the fabric may start to pill. Therefore no matter how clean the clothes are, they may just took tatty on.

Lhastingsmua Thu 21-Nov-19 14:04:08

If you don’t mind the items you currently cycle between, can’t you repurchase them? Whether that’s another pair of the same trousers, or different colours. At least you’ll know that they’ll look ok on and so won’t have to faff with trying things on etc

mumwon Thu 21-Nov-19 19:39:46

M & Co? have some nice things not only in curvy women size but in small women size & in-betweens grin perhaps one more pair of trousers (when you think about that term doesn't it sound wrong - I mean one/pair??) & one dressier top for parties or evenings that can be dressed up or down & nice scarves or long necklace to ring changes. (nice new scarfs in some charity shops!)

Areyoufree Thu 21-Nov-19 19:44:01

Absolutely not a freak, but I get the impression you don’t value yourself enough to get new clothes. You say everything looks awful on you, but I doubt that’s true. Don’t wait until you think you have lost enough weight to “deserve” new clothes - you deserve to feel good about yourself now. Your intrinsic value doesn’t change with your weight.

Angela9 Thu 21-Nov-19 19:47:40

I know what you mean! I have about 3 outfits I wear on rotation. I used to love clothes when I was younger/slimmer/prettier now I just put on the same maternity trousers and loose tops every day. I'm trying to reform and try and dress better for my figure but keep putting it off until I'm slimmer again. I still have my smaller clothes but they are probably all damp/moth eaten/ out of fashion by now

nancy75 Thu 21-Nov-19 19:50:40

Op I understand not wanting to waste money if you’re losing weight but if you’re missing out on doing things because you’ve got nothing to wear that needs to change.
What size are you about a 20?
Most high street shops go to that size & ebay is also a good bet

Neolara Thu 21-Nov-19 19:52:34

I hate shopping for clothes and am rubbish at it. I now book myself in to a John Lewis style advisor session every 6 months or so and without fail, the advisor has managed to find me clothes that look good. It's such a relief.

gavisconismyfriend Thu 21-Nov-19 20:25:50

I’m like you! Have the same dress in different colours, wear them everyday for work. Seasalt is a great shop - has some clothes in up to a 28, I’m a couple of inches taller than you and a stone heavier and their 22-24 fits me well. Find something you like and order in multiple colours .

Angela9 Thu 21-Nov-19 21:00:38

Most people do wear a uniform of some kind though for day to day life. Maybe concentrate on improving your uniform (best fitting and best quality versions you can afford) and on having a couple of dressier items so you don't meet out on anymore life stuff (Id aim for one evening/party look and one Sunday best type outfit)

bobbleb Thu 21-Nov-19 21:11:29

OP, I am sat here thinking that if I was your size, I'd send you a clothing parcel. It's so important to feel good about yourself. What size are you? I'm probably too small (12/14), but just wondering if Mumsnet can be awesome and a couple of people send something that you might love. Hope that isn't really cheeky to suggest! If you have the means to treat yourself to one new item, I would suggest a wrap dress or tunic which you can wear with thick tights. You can tighten it or wear a belt as you slim.

justaperson Thu 21-Nov-19 21:16:48

Decided to make my own 'capsule' wardrobe / uniform as I never think I look that great in anything and just can't be bothered trying stuff on.

My day to day 'uniform' is 4 pairs of the same trouser in different colours (H&M super stretch, black, grey, navy, denim) 7 or so plain Primark long sleeve tops in varying colours (mostly soft colours, plum, cream, grey, black) plus 3 x long cardigans which match the trousers. I wear with trainers to be casual, clarkes brogues to look slightly smarter (picked up on ebay, try them on in the shop first!). For a night out I wear the black or denim trousers, spangly ballet flats and sparkly top for a night out (Sainsburys).

Job done, not too expensive and I hardly ever have to think what to wear on most days.

I do also have smart stuff eg for interviews/funerals etc though!

carrots555 Thu 21-Nov-19 21:23:24

Can you not buy cheap and cheerful (say Primark, H&M etc) in your current size?

Then if you lose weight go and buy your desired items from a good quality shop for the long-term in your final size?

Lunafortheloveogod Thu 21-Nov-19 21:49:27

My only thing would be what happens if the trousers get dirty mid day like I’d be able to change into a clean pair. But if it works for you there’s not a problem.

Trying stuff on is definitely key though, sizes by shop vary a bit so don’t get caught up in numbers (16 in river island and a 12 in Tesco fit me for some reason)

Lillyhatesjaz Thu 21-Nov-19 22:59:27

I had put on weight and many of my clothes no longer fitted so I was keeping them for when I lost weight. I have now lost some weight and a lot of my old clothes fit but I no longer like them, the trousers particularly are a very old fashioned shape, and now too long for me so they have all gone to the charity shop. What I am saying is get some clothes for how you are now.

manicmij Thu 21-Nov-19 23:38:27

You are not a freak. Just think about all the clothes people have and wear once or not even at all. Bought because cheap in a sale or for a one night out then consigned to the back of a wardrobe or landfill. Don't beat yourself, if your clothes are clean and smart they are fine. Why not concentrate on finding one item at a time eg a new top and not be distracted looking for anything else then go on to look for say a jumper. Even dress up with earrings, necklace for a change. One thing at a time. Good Luck.

DontbeABabs Thu 21-Nov-19 23:42:56

It sounds like far too much effort to me - because you have to be a slave of laundry, but nothing wrong in wearing the same clothes or kind of clothes.

I have turned down a lot of social invitations in the last few years because I really have nothing to wear
THAT is what's wrong in your system, it makes YOU miss out. Pinterest is your friend, or internet in general. You can see real women the same size as you and what you could wear and might like.

Don't look at Kate Middleton's wardrobe!

theEnglishInPatient Thu 21-Nov-19 23:49:22

I'd also suggest a stylist like Styled by Susie, who will advise about high street shops and affordable things. You just need to get your confidence back.

It's all great to lose weight, but you deserve to enjoy yourself and feel good now. It will help you in the long term.

maggiecate Fri 22-Nov-19 00:13:08

First of all people are inviting YOU to things, not your clothes - they want YOU to be there, not ‘you but only if you wear something new every time.’

Nothing wrong with having a small wardrobe - the people who tell you otherwise are trying to sell you more clothes- but if it’s limiting you to this extent it sounds like you need to supplement it a bit. Suggestions for places to get something transitional that won’t blow a ton of cash - Sainsbury’s Tu range is good. Debenhams Principles petites will be cut for someone your height. Simply Be. Asos Curve.

But before you go shopping for outfits get your underpinnings sorted - and if you’re going to splash some cash this is where you should do it. Get a good bra, that fits you properly. If you get that right the clothes on top look so much better.

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