My ex DH and I separated two years ago after being married for over twenty years and I moved to the other end of the country to begin a new life. We remained on very good terms and divorced amicably last year. During this time I have kept in touch with my ex MIL and we have exchanged regular and affectionate letters, cards, emails etc. DexH now has a new partner. I have enjoyed being single and dating and am currently seeing a very nice man.
Sadly my lovely ex MIL was diagnosed with cancer about a year ago and although she was having treatment, died last week. I immediately got in touch with the family to offer my condolences. My ex called yesterday and has requested that I don't attend the funeral. I found this very upsetting and hurtful as I would have liked to pay my respects. I am trying very hard to make allowances - grief does alter people's judgement and ideas. He has said he'd find it too difficult having me there and just wants to focus on his immediate family and partner. For the avoidance of doubt, I wouldn't expect to play a big part in the day, just to sit quietly at the back, have a cup of tea at the wake and then quietly leave. If I do go now, it will feel like I'm forcing the issue and that would be wrong.
Abu to want to attend but now feel I can't? And how else can I mark her passing if I can't be there? She was a special lady who I will miss greatly.
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AIBU?
To want to attend my ex MIL's funeral
95 replies
LadyJaffleton · 20/11/2019 21:46
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
331 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
41%
You are NOT being unreasonable
59%
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