As I’ve got older I’ve got better at biting my tongue, but sometimes what I wanted to say (versus what I actually said) bubbles angrily in me and today is one of those days!
So feel free to join me in letting out that you actually wanted to say and what you actually said. I guess this is lighthearted, so don’t go too deep, ok?
I’ll go first before I exploded:
What I said “I’m sure the school are trying their hardest and the staff are very stretched”
What I wanted to say “Your sense of entitlement makes me want to scream. I’m sure the teacher has better things to worry about than one sodding missing Smiggle pen and you’re a total knob for trying to speak to the Head about it!!!”’
What I said: “Yes, I guess it is our turn to go to your Father’s for Christmas as we’ve not spent it with him for 5 years”.
What I wanted to say “I’d rather eat Xmas
dinner at McDonalds than sit in the company of that drunken, arrogant snob. At least there no one will get so drunk that they wet themselves” (past Xmas nightmare visit)
Ooooh that felt good!!
AIBU?
What I wanted to say, what I actually said...
YouthGoneMild · 17/11/2019 20:14
I have the complete opposite problem. As I get older I bite my tongue less. Sometime I realise i’ve been rude and should have kept it to myself.
Except where DP is concerned. He said “i’m not changing for anyone, take it or leave it” I wanted to say your an immature dick head and i’ll leave it thanks, instead I said ok 
What I wanted to say 'you did what?? You deducted 4 hours for my final salary due to leave? Never mind the fact that I have worked in excess of 200 hours unpaid overtime this year for the god damn company... You can fuck right off deducting 4 hours from my.pay you ass holes'
What I actually said - 'oh, ok, no problem'
(at least I've left now!!)
What I said (actually it was a plea/ borderline beg) to my ExH “Please consider taking our son to his best friend’s birthday party. I know it’s your weekend but he’ll be heartbroken not to go”
What I wanted to say “You selfish fucking cunt. He’s 5 fucking years old and you’re refusing to give up 2 hours on a fucking Sunday as a one off so your son can go to a party. You’d rather try to spite me and upset your own child than do the right thing! And no I won’t pay for present you tight bastard!!!!” 
Ahhh that actually felt good 
What I wanted to say: “DS can you empty the dishwasher please?”
What I actually said: “Christmas”
Ooh one I’m still mortified about years later.
Colleague with a bit of a car crash life, basically stalked a client and wangled her way into a few dates with him. He quickly saw the error of his ways and dumped her. She went crazy and started all sorts of awful behaviours- making malicious reports about him to all sorts of agencies. Police involved etc. Then a few weeks later I arrive to work and everyone is huddled round her. She has some news. Of course she is pregnant with his child! 
What I meant to say: “congratulations!”
What I actually said: “you stupid cow”
I did apologise profusely but the damage was done. I never intended to say that, I just blurted out the first thought in my head.
Love reading some of these.
I'm terrible I can't bite my tongue
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