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To think people who parent like this do their children no favours

(153 Posts)
lastqueenofscotland Wed 06-Nov-19 20:11:46

Back story, as a bit of a side hustle I ride some horses for a lady who keeps them on her own private property. These are fully fit Competition horses, not novice or easy rides. It is a paid arrangement which I am grateful for.

A colleague overheard me talking about it to someone yesterday and chirped up that their 11 year old started riding last year and she’d love to come and ride these horses... I brushed it off and just laughed and said “oh haha it’s not really that sort of set up”

Today she came to me and said quite seriously “when can my daughter come and ride” to which I explained they are not my horses, they are kept on private property and they are not appropriate rides for a child”
To which the woman turned round looking horrified saying that she’d told her daughter about me and how she could come and ride these horses. I stressed that it wasn’t appropriate or safe.
She then sent me an email later in the day asking if I couldn’t just ask the lady that owns them and surely she could just come round and have a quick ride. I ignored the email.
If she brings it up again WIBU to point out animals are not toys and if she’s the one who’s disappointed her daughter, not me?!

user1471462209 Wed 06-Nov-19 20:13:12

Wtf? Crazy woman!

SpookilyBadOooooooh Wed 06-Nov-19 20:14:53

What a rude, obnoxious twat.

Definitely tell her that She’s the one disappointing her DD, not you. Silly bint

Overdueanamechange Wed 06-Nov-19 20:17:39

I used to compete and I would have hated a kid coming along and messing up all of the hard work I had put in, being too rough on the bit or seat. Tell her how dangerous competition horses can be for the inexperienced.

Winterdaysarehere Wed 06-Nov-19 20:20:29

Send her a link to a riding school.

nobodyimportant Wed 06-Nov-19 20:21:05

It would be like putting a learner driver in a race car. Pointless and potentially dangerous. No, No. No!

thedevilwithbarty Wed 06-Nov-19 20:21:45

YABU for saying "side hustle", it's vomitworthy grin

YANBU about the weirdo and her Veruca Salt daughter. Bonkers.

TheHumansAreDefinitelyDead Wed 06-Nov-19 20:22:26

Just give her the website address

TheHumansAreDefinitelyDead Wed 06-Nov-19 20:22:56

Just to get her off your back!

smileylottie87 Wed 06-Nov-19 20:24:03

Bloody hell what an idiot, she must be thinking if she keeps telling you it will happen then it magically will. Keep firm with your responses, as you have already been, if she says her child is upset as PP advised tell her she shouldn't have told her when you never agreed.

NoCleanClothes Wed 06-Nov-19 20:24:51

She sounds odd, is she just trying to get free riding lessons? Why does her DD particularly want to ride these horses? All sounds very strange.

BeatriceTheBeast Wed 06-Nov-19 20:25:05

I have seen so many similar threads on here re horses and idiot mothers taking the hump when their dds (correctly) aren't allowed to ride them. Completely bonkers. Yanbu.

Sohololopopo Wed 06-Nov-19 20:26:47

She needs to be told to fuck right off.

pictish Wed 06-Nov-19 20:29:17

“ YABU for saying "side hustle", it's vomitworthy”

What is with mumsnet for pecking at people for harmless expressions and terms they use? What relevance does it have to the query? None - it’s a petty dig for the sake of it. You wouldn’t dare say that to someone in person.

Willow2017 Wed 06-Nov-19 20:29:49

Tell her that if she knew the first thing about horses she wouldn't even be asking to put her dd who is only just learning on a bloody competition trained horse. They are not for learners they need experienced riders to handle them so why doesnt she understand that they could seriously injure her child? I would suggest she asks the stables if they would let her dd ride one of the liveried horses and see what thier reply is!

Utterly clueless does she even talk to the trainers at her dds stables?

IvinghoeBeacon Wed 06-Nov-19 20:30:04

Is this a parenting thing or just the fact that people who are daft and thick-skinned also sometimes have children?

Elieza Wed 06-Nov-19 20:31:19

The mother doesn’t understand the difference between competition animals worth as much as a house, and a riding school horse, half dead to the leg with a hard mouth.

It’s not the woman’s fault she doesn’t understand, she’s clearly not a horsey person. Her little darling is probably a “super little rider, we have high hopes for her at the next Olympics” type of thing.

Explain to her once again that these horses are very highly strung, very expensive, you’re sorry she misunderstood but there is no way that a novice rider could be safe on them and no way you would ever ask the owner. However if you do come across anyone looking for a girl to exercise a quiet friendly pony you will let her know.

Notmytelescope Wed 06-Nov-19 20:31:44

WTF! A complete CF who doesnt understand what shes actually asking for. I’ve had simmilar requests from a neighbour whose toddler likes ponies. I ride a horse belonging to someone else too and its slightly clouded by the fact that my DD rides her too (with special permission from the owner) and I keep having to point out that, regardless of whether or not the horse is suitable, she doesn’t belong to me and I don’t get to decide who rides her.

Keep repeating that the horse is not yours and the owner does not give permission for anyone else to ride. It seems like the idiot parent cannot understand that these horses are completely unsuitable but they must accept you can’t loan out other peoples property without permission!

BeatriceTheBeast Wed 06-Nov-19 20:32:32


I think it's something specific to parents who have ZERO experience with horses themselves, but who are for some reason hell bent on their dcs riding horses. They are often bellends.

lastqueenofscotland Wed 06-Nov-19 20:32:50

Yep the mother is not remotely horsey, and I suspect thinks that all horses are kick to go pull to stop and that’s it.

She seemed genuinely shocked when I said no. Silly mare.

BeatriceTheBeast Wed 06-Nov-19 20:34:09

Yep the mother is not remotely horsey

Mega shocker 😂.

BeatriceTheBeast Wed 06-Nov-19 20:34:50

Silly mare

A little bit horsey then thlgrin.

holidays987 Wed 06-Nov-19 20:35:18

Why can't she take her child to a riding centre, set up specifically for teaching people how to ride horses. Send her a link. She's being weird. And could compromise her child's safety too.

CAG12 Wed 06-Nov-19 20:37:38

Maybe dont say they're not toys.

Just say something like 'I feel like ive been very clear. This is a private arrangement and not appropriate for a child'.

lastqueenofscotland Wed 06-Nov-19 20:38:20

The girl has fortnightly lessons, and I’m sure wants to ride more than her parents can afford, but that isn’t my problem!

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