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to think that while bringing uninvited children to a party is rude, this mother's response is HARDCORE

(658 Posts)
thedevilwithbarty Sun 03-Nov-19 12:23:57

So there has been a bit of an issue lately at our local primary (the one my kids went to, they're teens now but it's a small community, so we still know a lot of people there) with people bringing additional kids (siblings) to parties and it's perceived as quite cheeky, especially when they're left and hosting parents expected to supervise and feed kids they didn't invite.

There was a whole-class party at a leisure centre last weekend at which the hosting mum had done little lunch boxes for each child with the usual - rolls, fairy cakes, fruit, veg sticks, crisps etc. There were unfortunately several uninvited siblings dumped by their parents at the start of the party.

If I were the hosting parent and I knew this wa likely to happen, I would have either put a note on the invitation that I was catering for the children individually, so please do NOT bring additional children, or brought a few extra boxes of food - I'd be pissed off at the cheekiness, but I wouldn't see a child go hungry.

This mum had brought a little bin with a sign on it saying "Yuck Bin" with a vomiting emoji shock which she passed around for all the children to put the items they didn't like from their food boxes. Then the uninvited siblings were allowed to take food from the Yuck Bin.

I wasn't there, obviously, but I have heard via friends that one of the mothers of the additional children flipped out at the end of the party when she was told by her child about how he was fed. There was a bit of a scene and the birthday child was upset. I can see her point tbh - she's a rude cow for dumping her children wholesale without asking first, but the hosting mum's way of dealing with it was horrible. AIBU to think that nobody has behaved very well here?

FrancisCrawford Sat 09-Nov-19 17:34:49

*run with the undertone of the OP posts and the implications coming from use of language such as being ‘made’ to eat out of the bing

Very true about the undertone. There was a dist8nct impression given that OP was “on the side of” CF mum, at the very least

FrancisCrawford Sat 09-Nov-19 17:36:12

For “bing” read bin

If she had forced the gatecrashers to eat out of a bing, that would have been unreasonable!

And dirty.

ddl1 Sun 10-Nov-19 21:00:38

I think it is rude to bring uninvited children, and I wouldn't blame the mother for giving them leftovers or even nothing at all except drinks of water; it is the use of the bin with a vomit emoji that I find objectionable.

Wineislifex Mon 11-Nov-19 17:49:43

I think the ones who are claiming the mother acted intentionally rude and cruel and threw words around such as bullying and abuse are the parents that have and/or do dump invited siblings at parties 🤣🤣 CFers let this be a warning to you, the bin is waiting!

Wineislifex Mon 11-Nov-19 17:50:31

Uninvited bloody autocorrect!

torain6319 Mon 11-Nov-19 21:27:13

I’ve actually done something similar. Bin was NOT meant for uninvited siblings! It was simply for the things kids didn’t like. As party food was mostly chosen by my dc, any leftovers were simply eaten by dc later and not thrown away. Host mom probably did same and made into a game. And yes I did have 1 older and 1 younger sibling from same family uninvited who ate from the “yuck bin” and quite happily as there was no slop involved. Host probably patted self on back for brilliant plan to save food actually served an even better purpose and then gets jumped☹️. I’d have quietly told other mom to fuck off & never invited any of her children again.

Violetparis Mon 11-Nov-19 21:34:39

I would have asked the kids with siblings to share their food with their siblings. If they didn't want to I'd let the parent who dumped their uninvited kids on me deal with any fallout at pick up.

MulticolourMophead Tue 12-Nov-19 09:13:56

I have checked back through the OP's posts and can't see anywhere that she states that the host mum deliberately did this to humiliate the kids.

I agree. I still think the mum was just trying to ensure the kids had food, and the label on the bin wasn't at the top of her priorities.

OP, instead of making assumptions about what happened, why don't you go and have a chat with the party mum, and find out what really went on. I doubt your friend was present for the whole thing, so won't have the whole story.

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