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To not stay all day at a friends

(53 Posts)
Lovethetimeyouhave Sat 19-Oct-19 12:39:47

If you go to a friends house, how long do you usually stay?

I have a friend who thinks 6 hours isn't enough and now complains when I leave, so I go less and now she complains I don't go much!

So, how long would you stay at a friends, whilst your kids play?

Apolloanddaphne Sat 19-Oct-19 12:41:48

Depends how far you have travelled. If they are close by a few hours is ample. If you have travelled a long way then longer. But 6 hours is a mega long time to hang out no matter what.

legoninjago1 Sat 19-Oct-19 12:43:36

That kind of petty pressure is my pet hate. Getting it from parents / in-laws is bad enough. I definitely wouldn't put up with it from a friend.

Lovethetimeyouhave Sat 19-Oct-19 12:43:40

I live 5 minutes walk away, it annoys me going there as it's hard to leave, ds argues and they argue and I find it too much, it eats up a whole day, it's actually been a few months since I've been, I'm supposed to go today, have already told her I'm only going for a couple of hours, but I'm now dreading it. Thing is I like her, but this situation I don't like

Passthecherrycoke Sat 19-Oct-19 12:46:30

Does she stay that long if she comes to you?

Ponoka7 Sat 19-Oct-19 12:47:00

Well it should be arranged beforehand.

Sometimes you might stay for lunch and tea, sometimes for a few hours. Other times you might have tea and watch a film etc.

She's being ridiculous.

GiveMeAllTheGin8 Sat 19-Oct-19 12:47:01

Two hours is plenty!

Countrylifeornot Sat 19-Oct-19 12:49:32

I'd be expectation setting before the day. 'so, will we come and spend Saturday morning with you? Don't worry about lunch as we'll have to be away by 12. I'll bring pastries for breakfast' or suchlike.

brentwoodbaby Sat 19-Oct-19 12:51:18

2 hours is more than enough if it's a local friend. I have a friend who lives 3 hours away and I normally stay overnight if we visit there and vice versa

Lovethetimeyouhave Sat 19-Oct-19 12:54:25

If she comes here I actually set a time that she has to be leaving, she'll arrive at 12 and I'll say she has to go by 4!

I'm an introvert and just want to be at home in all honesty! She's the complete opposite

JustDanceAddict Sat 19-Oct-19 12:58:35

Two hours if local is enough w young kids- maybe 3 if incorporating a mealtime.

IwantedtobeEmmaPeel Sat 19-Oct-19 12:58:49

I used to have a relative like this and she used to make it so hard to leave even after being there for over 5 hours and I stopped visiting so much for a while. In the end I started visiting again more regularly, because I was fond of her and I knew how much the visits meant to her, but was just more firm upfront about how long my visits were going to be. I found that once she realised I was visiting more often and that it wasn't going to be too long before my next visit she started to relax and accept the shorter visits.

Namechange84 Sat 19-Oct-19 13:00:28

2 hours, 3 absolute tops for a local.

I'd hate it if someone popped round for a coffee and stayed 6+ hours.

HollowTalk Sat 19-Oct-19 13:02:00

Six hours!

I'd go for an hour and that's it. As soon as the kids start to fight, time to go home.

SaddleGoose Sat 19-Oct-19 13:07:10

If you're that close to each other, a couple of hours surely. Is she lonely? I'd run out of things to talk about in 6 hours!

CAG12 Sat 19-Oct-19 13:07:25

@Lovethetimeyouhave im totally with you. I love my friends but I find too much social interaction draining. 2-3hrs is ok. I have one very close friend that im happy to spend afternoons with.

Orangecake123 Sat 19-Oct-19 13:15:28

Yike 6 hours is way too much.

Tell her at the start you have another appointment to get to at X or you can't stay long. 2 hours max for me unless i was actually staying over.I did 30 mins- it was enough.

Orangecake123 Sat 19-Oct-19 13:15:44


LellyMcKelly Sat 19-Oct-19 13:20:05

I’d be shoving them out the door if they hadn’t gone after about 2 hours, unless it was a rare visit from a friend who lived 100 miles away, and even then it would involve something like going out for a swanky lunch and then to the theatre. Are you just sitting about for 6 hours? That would drive me insane. How can she want you to stay that long? Does she not have any jobs to do?

Countryescape Sat 19-Oct-19 13:24:16

Nothing worse! I have one friend who always stays too long. Arrives at 8am and I’m trying to get her out the door by lunchtime

EdWinchester Sat 19-Oct-19 13:41:50

If it was just a daytime visit - an hour or so.

I have a friend that stays too long. It’s really annoying.

P1nkHeartLovesCake Sat 19-Oct-19 13:54:44

I think it depends on the friendship & how often you see each other.

Some friends I only stay 2 hours ( I.e I go over for lunch or they come here, we eat the dc play then we leave) we go this regularly

When my best friend comes over she gets here about 12 we have lunch and she stays for dinner and drinks in the evening too. Same when I go to hers. Due to work, dc etc we don’t see each other as often as we like maybe once a month

NoSauce Sat 19-Oct-19 13:56:20

6 hours? shock

I would only being staying that long if I’d travelled 200 miles not if I lived 5 minutes away.

dustybluebell Sat 19-Oct-19 13:57:18

I had friends 45 mins away who'd come for lunch and then stay until 9pm. Making it a full day including dinner as well. Far too long in one persons and their kids company. No matter how friendly you are.

flouncyfanny Sat 19-Oct-19 13:58:05

If she's 5 minutes walk away, i'd stay no longer than an hour tbh.
guess you're there now.
plan your escape quickly...

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