Dear all
I was wondering if I m being unreasonable.
My in laws are actually quite nice people but in the past few years they have done small stuff which, combined, has started ticking me off! I have a bit of an aversion towards them and was wondering if it is justified. Here a list:
- FIL is super stingy: he comes to our city once a month for work and stays over at our place but never thinks of inviting us out for dinner or anything
- when FIL comes once a month, he sometimes does not communicate what time and ends up showing up too early sometimes
- MIL forgot I m vegetarian for her birthday so I ended up having a slice of meat giving the rest to husband (didn t want to be rude on the spot). Next day I had indigestion which caused me a loud and long session in bathroom at their place (we stayed over because it is a 3 hr drive), as if I was not embarassed enough, when I got out, MIL asked in front of 10 brunch guests if there still is any toilet roll left in toilet.
- day after wedding FIL asked me twice when we re having babies
- once talking economy and politics and giving my opinion, FIL didn t let me finish my sentence and bashed my comment by saying „nonsense“!
- we are expecting a baby And while my friends and family shower us with gifts, parents in law have done nothing until my hisband felt embarassed and told them if they could also buy some things
- MIL bought cheap polyester baby Gloves (instead of cotton as we asked)
- MIL bought 3 baby clothes all of them saying „i love daddy“ none mentioning anything about mummy
- MIL commented „you look good, you are very full“ during my pregnancy
- They never get me anything for my birthdays, while my parents think about my husbad when it s his birthday, even if just a dinner...
- MIL is very gossipy about people I don t know (neighbors etc) and keeps on repeating the same stories every time I see her
- I ve been made redundant due to pregnancy (in Switzerland there s no protection unfortunately) and my mother was telling my FIL that it s no big deal, worst case I can stay home and care for baby 1-2 years and that she also stayed home for 2 years when she had me, his response was that both partners must work and contribute 50/50 financially because it is unfair to put all financial pressure on one person (notice the guy was a big shot himself at a bank and his wife was taken care of most of her life!)
- I m a mixed child, one of my parents comes from a third world country he had to flee in the 70s for political war reasons, my MIL was a Part time German teacher (when she worked). Once out of the blue she started complaining that she was approached by a volunteering organisation asking her to teach german to refugee families (as part of an integration program) once a week for a couple of hours since she s retired, she was saying: I can t believe they permitted themselves to bother me, I m retired I worked all my life and I want to enjoy it now.... I am so annoyed at this organisation (PS she never had to work hard, only did part time teaching)
- FIL asked us if we want to go to their place for his birthday and I answered that I have a friend visiting from the UK that weekend and that we planned it long ago (shey got her flight ticket and all), he seemed quite pissed off
There are a few more points that I probably missed but I guess this gives you a gist of the situation... am I being ureasonable for not being able to really like them? confused
Thank you