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DH just asked me not to fart in front of him

(349 Posts)
Nobhobs Sun 13-Oct-19 21:43:00

I don't make a point of doing it, but every now and then it happens. It's natural and can't always be helped? He on the other hand forces out massive loud farts, makes eye contact and faces whilst he does it. I usually roll my eyes and laugh/shake my head but all in good humour. Just sat on the sofa and I let out a small one (not loud, forced or smelly) and he sighed and said "seriously can you please not fart in front of me"

I'm a bit lost for words. I'm actually a bit upset with him. He's my bloody husband and now I need to feel insecure about farting? We're completely comfortable around each other, I've just had our bloody baby he's seen far worse than a little fart. He thinks IBU for getting upset about it and thinks it's a fair request. I think he's being an arsehole.

LeekMunchingSheepShagger Sun 13-Oct-19 21:44:20

Sit on his face and let rip op.

LaurieFairyCake Sun 13-Oct-19 21:44:30

Just shrug and say of course I will. When you stop.

TipToeToothFairy Sun 13-Oct-19 21:45:04


He is an arsehole. You'll stop when he does

Chilledout11 Sun 13-Oct-19 21:45:24

I try not to but if one happens it happens. He does it so next time say that back too him.

Jollitwiglet Sun 13-Oct-19 21:46:26

Ask him outright why it is acceptable for him to do it and not you.

Bet you it's some bullshit about not being ladylike or some other crap

AndNoneForGretchenWieners Sun 13-Oct-19 21:46:40

DH and I used to find farts hilarious and rate them. I couldn't be doing with someone with such double standards as your DH.

Slat3 Sun 13-Oct-19 21:46:43

You’re married?! How has this conversation only just come up.
He’s being v strange, especially if he doesn’t practice what he preaches

Justmuddlingalong Sun 13-Oct-19 21:47:17

And what's he planning on doing when you ignore his request, move out?

FoodWoes Sun 13-Oct-19 21:47:37

I'd spend the next 11 weeks farting into a mason jar as his Christmas present. But I'm petty like that.

GettingABitDesperateNow Sun 13-Oct-19 21:47:52

What is it ok for him and not for you?

SuchAToDo Sun 13-Oct-19 21:49:46

It may not smell to you op but it may smell to him...often the one who dealt it can't smell it...and it's not pleasant to suddenly have a breath of someone's shitty farty smell...grin

Longdistance Sun 13-Oct-19 21:49:55

I’d fill the room with my bodily gases until the fucker passed out.

MapMyMum Sun 13-Oct-19 21:49:58

Call him out on the double standards and see what he says. If he still says its a fair request then say the same thing to him every single time he farts in front of you.

I hate double standards, and after a while it will build into resentment and cause big problems

IncrediblySadToo Sun 13-Oct-19 21:50:44

Because you’re a ‘laydeee’?!


DartmoorDoughnut Sun 13-Oct-19 21:51:08

@FoodWoes You’re a genius

SuchAToDo Sun 13-Oct-19 21:51:15

I just read that he does farts ....give him the same treatment and ask him not to do them too

Elieza Sun 13-Oct-19 21:51:17

Could it be “Now you are the mother of his child you should behave in a ladylike fashion” ?

I’m not saying that btw, I’m imagining a devils advocate comment.

I’m of the opinion what’s sauce for the goose....cheeky git. When he grows up you will too.

Bouffalant Sun 13-Oct-19 21:51:36

Men can be such absolute dickheads.

Duchessgummybuns Sun 13-Oct-19 21:51:42

Double standards. I’d fart and make faces and eye contact just as he does and tell him I’d stop when he does

Wafflecopter Sun 13-Oct-19 21:53:24

Just say, ‘Yes I do mind, now shut the fuck up.’

hoverboardforchristmas Sun 13-Oct-19 21:53:36

Ask him why he can and not you?

Pukkatea Sun 13-Oct-19 21:54:03

He is being very unreasonable to tell you off for something he does himself - presumably because it's not ladylike enough!

That said, I do hate how more and more people are finding it funny to constantly fart all the time. Loads of my friends do it and think it's a hilarious personality quirk when no, you're just gross and you stink. I'm all up for everyone stopping it.

Whatsername7 Sun 13-Oct-19 21:54:07

Agree in your case the double standard is the issue. I personally hate it when dh farts in my direction. Its grim. But, it happens. Of course it happens and its natural, but there are polite ways of doing it.

Ilovetolurk Sun 13-Oct-19 21:54:57

I highly recommend processed peas

Two tins and off you go

Make him beg for mercy for hypocritical behaviour

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