Advanced search

AIBU or is this rude?

(68 Posts)
Sorryfofty Mon 23-Sep-19 19:15:42

I'm in a group chat with the work girls. 10 of us in it. I wrote in it and asking if anyone knew what happened to someone who was let go today. All read it but no one has replied. AIBU to have been ignored. This isnt the only time i've been ignored. I also have a feeling there is another group chat which i am not included in.

Aquamarine1029 Mon 23-Sep-19 19:20:05

Perhaps they don't want to participate in pointless idle gossip over a situation that is none of their business. Or yours.

Pitterpatterpettysteps Mon 23-Sep-19 19:21:32

Agree with pp, sounds like they don’t want to be drawn into gossip

Neverender Mon 23-Sep-19 19:21:56

If they're friends with her they probably don't want to share it.

JumpyLiz Mon 23-Sep-19 19:22:43

No way would I engage on WA about something like that.

Shoxfordian Mon 23-Sep-19 19:23:06

Yeah I wouldn't join in with gossip either

Qcng Mon 23-Sep-19 19:24:21

That's so nosey and rude of you!
Someone was let go.
Reasons are confidential unless shared by the sack-ee themselves.

Sorryfofty Mon 23-Sep-19 19:24:59

Well i think its funny how they spoke about him about and even put in complaints about him too. So i would say they are already involved in the "gossip".

SauvignonBlanche Mon 23-Sep-19 19:25:12

I wouldn’t discuss something like that in a group chat.

optimisticpessimist01 Mon 23-Sep-19 19:25:31

Your thinking too much into it....

Summersunshine2 Mon 23-Sep-19 19:27:44

Probably no one wants to be the first to comment on a sensitive subject and are all waiting to see if someone else replies.
If you feel you are being ignored only post positive comments in future where you aren't expecting a reply, then there will be nothing to get upset about.

Sorryfofty Mon 23-Sep-19 19:30:23

Also its not like i was gossiping, all i asked is if anyone knew what happened. Also these girls love complaining about work so its not like i'm the only one posting about negitive things

SquishySquirmy Mon 23-Sep-19 19:31:58

If you have to ask that kind of question, it is best asked face to face and very discreetly.
Not in a group chat! If any of the other members are privy to that info, they would be very unwise to put their gossip down in writing, especially in a large group chat. Sharing confidential workplace information on WhatsApp could easily come back to bite them.

7Worfs Mon 23-Sep-19 19:32:55

If it’s your work phones I’d delete the message and not discuss anything HR would frown upon

SquishySquirmy Mon 23-Sep-19 19:34:31

And tbh a group chat where members talk about other colleagues behind their back sounds super bitchy.

dudsville Mon 23-Sep-19 19:34:50

They may be avoiding you, or the topic, but what can you do? Try to focus on calmer things for yourself?

Shoxfordian Mon 23-Sep-19 19:35:22

Remember anything you write down can be seen by other people at work. Keep out of it op

Yeahnahyeah1 Mon 23-Sep-19 19:35:30

I wouldn’t have answered either. General chat or bitching is ‘fine’ but I wouldn’t be drawn into casting aspersions about an actual event like this. Having it in black and white wouldn’t be great would it.

Benefitofthedoubt Mon 23-Sep-19 19:36:23

Don’t put anything on WhatsApp that you wouldn’t shout out to the whole office!

Really. It gets sent on all over the place.

Hederex Mon 23-Sep-19 19:40:49

I imagine they don't know what to reply. A terrible idea to discuss something like this in a group chat. Anyone could take a screenshot of any less than professional replies.

BarrenFieldofFucks Mon 23-Sep-19 19:41:50

I wouldn't want to get into that sort of chat either

Queenlatifahsleftboob Mon 23-Sep-19 19:41:53

Oh I wonder if you work at the same place as me (I'm not in your WAgroup though!!) as we had an announcement like this today.......

Naillig222 Mon 23-Sep-19 19:44:05

No it's not rude. It's rude of you to ask something like that in a group text. I wouldn't reply either.

TickledOnion Mon 23-Sep-19 19:48:54

I’m going to go against the grain and say it was a bit rude. I think it’s fairly normal (though maybe inadvisable) to have whatsapp groups where you moan about work with colleagues. It would have been fine for someone to say that they weren’t comfortable about discussing it on WA or that they didn’t know.

chickenyhead Mon 23-Sep-19 19:49:46


I presume OP asked as this was a typical type chat.

To be honest, as a human, working in the office with a diverse range of other humans, a bitch fest can really help you keep from stabbing coworkers.

Are you close to any particular one of them OP. Could you ask one by text?

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »