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AIBU to be absolutely disgusted with myself?

(224 Posts)
Buginmyrug Sat 14-Sep-19 02:32:57

NC because of the shame involved.

Back in May I started getting an itchy scalp. I tried to ignore it and hoped it would go away by using different hair products, the change of season, blah blah. It has been getting worse, though, so I googled and deduced I probably had seborrhoeic dermatitis. I booked a GP appointment and was considering buying some Neutrogena T-gel.

Then this evening A BUG FELL OUT OF MY HAIR. I have fucking LICE and I didn't know! My DD (16) spotted it and was really shocked. She then had a good look at my scalp and could see at least 4 or 5 creatures crawling about. Even typing this makes me want to curl into the foetal position. I freaked out and rushed out to the nearest 24-hour supermarket, and have spent the last few hours scraping my scalp with a nit comb until it practically bled (I cannot tell you the stuff I pulled out) and applying the overnight treatment to shampoo off tomorrow.

I'm ashamed, mortified and disgusted. Four months! I have stayed with friends, been to the hairdresser, gone on holiday... How did this happen? Is this normal? Do other adult women randomly get nits? My DD hasn't got any, we don't think (of course we'll do the treatment on her tomorrow too, just in case). Should I have thought of it sooner? Is it my fault? And is it like an STD? Do I have to warn anyone I might have infected? The shame!

I'm sitting here freaking out, wondering what the heck I will find on the towel that is currently wrapped around my head tomorrow. Sleep seems an impossibility.

If this has ever happened to any of you, please put my mind at ease. I've never had lice in my life - just in case this seems a bit of an overreaction.

BitchyArriver Sat 14-Sep-19 02:35:58

Poor you! I’ve never had nits as an adult but always thought it would be the BEST excuse for being off work.


Misses point of thread completely


Jupiters Sat 14-Sep-19 02:40:05

I'm really not an expert, but I think if you'd had nits since May you would have found out before today, so the itchy scalp and the nits may not be connected.
I have had flaky scalp before and T-gel completely cleared it up.

Shelvesoutofbooks Sat 14-Sep-19 02:40:16

It's just lice - make sure to wash all your bedding on a hot wash, change your hairbrush and you're pretty much good!

madcatladyforever Sat 14-Sep-19 02:42:11

Poor you. I too have been similarly misled by the little beasts and I'm an ex nurse.
You don't always realise you have them.
I usually catch them off friends kids. Itching now lol.

Mediumred Sat 14-Sep-19 02:43:41

Aww!! It’s a long time ago (before kids, I was in my 20s) and I went to the doctors with my itching and he said it was probably an allergy, and then I later found a bloomin nit!! Gah!! They are fuckers! I didnt even know any children at the time, I always thought it must have been the tube/bus, who knows, but, yes, random adult women can get nits! Try not to freak out, you are treating them now!

madcatladyforever Sat 14-Sep-19 02:45:03

BTW tomorrow you will be lice free and the buggers will all be dead. Just make sure you do a thorough final comb to get the eggs off. Onectreatment does the job. It will be such a relief you won't believe it.

Jozen Sat 14-Sep-19 02:45:43

I'm surprised the hairdresser didn't notice! As pp was saying perhaps the itchy scalp and lice aren't connected and the lice are recent.
I do feel your pain though, I caught headlice from DD years ago. My hair was easier to treat than hers as I was more patient with the treatment and combing.
You'll soon be rid of them. I wonder where you picked them up from though.

SweetMarmalade Sat 14-Sep-19 02:49:03

I haven’t had headlice but Ds has.

The only thing I used was the nitty gritty comb and conditioner. Combed through for ages, rinsed, repeated.

Hope you get rid of the bleeders soon flowers

OwlBeThere Sat 14-Sep-19 02:50:09

It’s only headlice. Calm down. It happens, you’ll want to check the rest of your family for them too. There isn’t any need to boil wash bedding or change hairbrushes either, they don’t live anywhere except the hair.

Oddbutnotodd Sat 14-Sep-19 02:52:54

There is no need to be ashamed. If you had lice when you had your hair cut the hairdresser would have seen them and told you. Also they would probably have fallen out when brushed your hair. I caught lice from my children once and I can remember the slight horror I felt. No need to really freak out!

As long as you repeat the combing every few days to check they’ve gone you’ll be fine. I used to comb my hair over a sheet of white paper to see if anything live fell out! Hope your scalp isn’t too sore. 💐

pollyglot Sat 14-Sep-19 02:59:41

I worked in a very posh boarding school, and one of my duties, as a house parent, was to check the kids' hair for nits in the shower every night. Every kid had them, at some stage or other. Nits are rife..anyone, anywhere can get them. Surprised that you hairdresser didn't spot them - i remember the first time my boys had an infestation, the barber refused to cut their hair - I was mortified that I hadn't seen them.

Urskeks Sat 14-Sep-19 03:05:49

I've had to treat myself before, when my youngest caught them, because I had dreadlocks and couldn't tell if my itching was psychosomatic or not. I've always been funny about putting my head that close to kids heads (since they both reached the most likely to catch nits age) and I'd check them often as well. So I think I was lucky but I've had to do the treatment.

fudgefeet Sat 14-Sep-19 03:10:46

I lived in a housing coop as a teenager and had an itchy head for a few months. It never occurred to me that it might be nits.
I only found out when I went to the hairdressers and they had to turn me away. I was mortified!
I combed through my hair that night and it was awful. I still cringe about it 20 years on. Turned out everyone in the coop had them and even worse many refused to do anything about it as it was “just nature”
I had to comb through my hair every day for about 6 months until I moved out.
I panic every time my head itches even today but one positive thing is I am great at de-licing my children.

ClaireElizabethBeauchampFraser Sat 14-Sep-19 03:15:35

I was getting my hair cut when a young girl came in for a hair up appointment for her prom that evening. She was being prepped by the junior when the junior let out a scream, dropped the brush and ran to her manager. What followed was my hairdresser refusing to style the girls hair due to nits, the Mother said ‘I know she does but I don’t have time to sort it tonight, can’t you just put her hair up’. The hairdresser gave her a dressing down for knowingly bringing her daughter in when she had nits!

I doubt your hairdresser would have continued with cutting your hair if you had nits when you were there! If there were only four then it’s a relatively new infection. I caught them after a hearing test at hospital, using the same earphones for every patient. I was newly married at the time and mortified to have to tell my husband! Thankfully his hair was so short that it was easy to treat (we caught it very quickly - I am pretty allergic to the blighters so my head feels like it is literally on fire)

pasturesgreen Sat 14-Sep-19 03:22:06

I'd be extremely surprised if the hairdresser didn't notice, more likely you haven't had it for as long as you think.

It's the middle of the night and things are bound to look worse than they are in reality: it's headlice, it happens, now you're treating it...So overall nothing to be ashamed or disgusted about.

Buginmyrug Sat 14-Sep-19 03:27:02

Thank you all for your kind words. I feel better and somewhat reassured. Onwards and upwards!

ILikeyourHairyHands Sat 14-Sep-19 03:33:30

Ahh, the first time I had nits as am adult I was confused where they came from.

It's ok though.

They are just nits.

ILikeyourHairyHands Sat 14-Sep-19 03:35:03

Nothing to be ashamed of.

ILikeyourHairyHands Sat 14-Sep-19 03:37:31

And I've had them on and off for five years, it's FINE.

pallisers Sat 14-Sep-19 03:44:50

If it is any consolation when my kids got them we went to a nit nurse and she said they don't like older scalps ... so you are young!

Despite both my dds having them and occasionally sleeping with me, at the time I didn't. I was old!

I'd be amazed if the source of infection wasn't your dd. Check her out.

Also since you have live lice ... cover your head in olive oil, put a shower cap on and sleep on a towel. leave the oil in for 12 hours. Then wash out. It will smother/kill the live lice. Not the nits though - you need to comb them out with a nitty gritty comb using conditioner and kitchen paper.

Russell19 Sat 14-Sep-19 03:59:18

I have an electric lice brush that I use regularly to brush through as I am a teacher. It beeps if it comes across anything and zaps it. It's great.

Luckily never had lice but I get paranoid.

LiveInAHidingPlace Sat 14-Sep-19 04:01:28

I've had nits as an adult, it wasn't a very nice thought but it's not like I could help it, it just happened.

ILikeyourHairyHands Sat 14-Sep-19 05:22:04

They bloody do like older scalps, not older men though.

ILikeyourHairyHands Sat 14-Sep-19 05:25:48

They are just nits though, no need to freak out OP, what are you worried about?

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