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AIBU Niece did a 'reactions' haul video for 18th birthday presents...

(404 Posts)
Bellasblankexpression Wed 11-Sep-19 09:32:35

I don't know if I am out of touch with the youth of today [I'm only in my 30s but I feel seriously old right now despite working in social media] but I'm feeling pretty offended by this.
My niece turned 18th recently so we all spent a little extra and got her something from a list she provided.
We got her a necklace she'd asked for, for example, but other people couldn't afford to splash out and got vouchers or something smaller.
She's recently become very active on Youtube and Instagram, which is fine and pretty usual, but she saved all her presents from her birthday bbq as she said she wanted to open them later - again, fine.
However the real reason she wanted to open them later is because she wanted to open them during a video and show her live reactions to them, rating them with a thumbs up or thumbs down and saying things like 'Thanks but not thanks Auntie XXX'

I wasn't aware of the video until she shared it on her Facebook page - she's friends with lots of family members on there so people will have seen it. My mum isn't on Facebook but heard about it [her present got a thumbs down] and is mortified and really hurt.

I want to say something to her mum about it but DH thinks I should let it go and not get involved.

What would you do?

OliviaCat Wed 11-Sep-19 09:34:14

This is shocking. I wouldn't buy her anything ever again. What a vile young woman.

SleepyHiraeth Wed 11-Sep-19 09:34:43

I don't know how I'd deal with it but she sounds incredibly rude and insensitive shocksad

DowntonCrabby Wed 11-Sep-19 09:35:04

What an entitled little brat!

I’d want to know if it was my DC.

IrmaFayLear Wed 11-Sep-19 09:35:46

This isn't Young Person behaviour. It's Seriously Rude Idiot behaviour. No more presents for her.

MulticolourMophead Wed 11-Sep-19 09:36:09

Me being petty would seek out her pages where she's done this and drop a few comments to let her know she's hurt people. And she'd be off my present list from now on for that kind of attitude.

SerenDippitty Wed 11-Sep-19 09:36:20

Horrible horrible thing to do. What a brat.

MysweetAudrina Wed 11-Sep-19 09:36:55

Next year she won't be able to do a video because she will have no presents to open. Quick lesson for her 5 mins of instagram fame.

mbosnz Wed 11-Sep-19 09:37:55

Um, sorry, but that is utterly revolting. How crass, and how rude.

I'm hoping my daughters would never do something like that because I'd be posting something back that was a major thumbs down for their embarrassingly vulgar, utterly completely disrespectful and ungrateful behaviour and privately tearing them a new one.

And making them very aware that there are now a whole host of people who are very likely never to buy her a gift again.

If it were my niece, I don't know. Possibly I wouldn't post something publicly on their facebook, though I'd be strongly tempted. I would be private messaging - either them or their parents.

DanielRicciardosSmile Wed 11-Sep-19 09:38:11

That is shockingly rude. I've seen videos like that where they open loot crates and so on, but to do it with gifts that people have actually chosen for them is awful.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER Wed 11-Sep-19 09:38:53

Appalling manners. I'd never buy her anything ever again.
Her parents should be thoroughly ashamed of her.

Fridakahlofan Wed 11-Sep-19 09:39:31

How horrid. You should comment on the video saying how sad it makes you. I just wish the internet would disappear sometimes.

BarbaraofSeville Wed 11-Sep-19 09:39:33

People do this? How utterly bizarre.

Did it not occur to her that the people who gave the presents would see her reactions, either because they follow her, or because someone told them about it?

People often stop giving presents at 18 anyway, so that definitely seems appropriate in this case.

Daffodil2018 Wed 11-Sep-19 09:39:48

I assumed she was very young but then reread your OP and she is 18!!!

Unforgivably rude. She is old enough to receive a sharp comment from you and a proper bollocking from her parents. I would be horrified if my child did this.

ChristmasBrisket Wed 11-Sep-19 09:39:54

Shockingly rude.

My sister and I used to joke about presents we received from our (lovely) aunt but only ever between ourselves. We would have been mortified if she’d ever got wind of it. Would not have filmed it and distributed it worldwide for any money.

Pepperwand Wed 11-Sep-19 09:40:09

She needs to be told and I'd agree that her parents do as well. It is shockingly rude and hurtful. I'd say something to the parents about her crass, ungrateful and nasty behaviour.

CantSleepClownsWillEatMe Wed 11-Sep-19 09:40:31

Wow that's rude shock! Given she's chosen to share it on Facebook then I really don't think you'd be out of order commenting. Who the hell does she think she is? I certainly wouldn't ever buy for her again and I wouldn't be slow about letting her know why.

What do her own parents think about this??

IsobelRae23 Wed 11-Sep-19 09:40:47

What a brat! Id take everything away from my ds if they pulled a stunt like that! Luckily they know to say thank you and be grateful for everything’s they've received. It took ds14, one week to admit he didn’t need like a coat his aunty bought him when he was 9 as it felt to tight- but he didn’t want to upset her. He was 9 and knew better than your niece!

boptist Wed 11-Sep-19 09:40:47

She’s 18, I’d be telling her not her mother.

Claphands Wed 11-Sep-19 09:40:56

id comment on it and say -'oh well you wont have this problem next year!'

whirlwinds Wed 11-Sep-19 09:41:11

I would say something to her mum, what a terrible thing to do! If she did it with a good vibe, being positive and happy for everything that would be different but this is just vile.

22Giraffes Wed 11-Sep-19 09:42:00

That's awful! Haul videos are pretty common and not a problem in themselves but to do it with gifts from friends and family and then to rate them and then to share the video with those same people is disgusting. There would be no more gifts from me.

Chocolatemouse84 Wed 11-Sep-19 09:42:01

What an awful to do. Its one thing doing a video, as long as you can be polite and nice about all presents, even if you secretly don't like it but to publicly give someones present a "thumbs down" is shocking

She's acted like a spoilt, entitled brat.i think I would mention how hurt your mum was to her parents, I'd want to know if my children did something like this.

slipperywhensparticus Wed 11-Sep-19 09:42:07

I would leave a comment and a thumbs down call her out on her behaviour

Glitterpearl Wed 11-Sep-19 09:42:15

I don't think she is a "vile young woman" at all. I think shes 18. Sometimes 18 year olds can be incredibly stupid, and insensitive to others. But that doesn't make them vile, they just have more growing to do.

It sounds like she has got caught up in the craze of haul/reaction videos, and I would bet that her thought process didn't extend beyond how many views/shares/likes/subs she would get. I doubt she set out to be hurtful.

That being said, if it were me, I wouldn't be able to not say anything. I would have a quiet word with her and let her know that her GM is upset, that she has caused offence to her family at the expense of internet popularity, and that she needs to apologise and make amends.

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