Advanced search

Manager won’t let me go to my wedding

(245 Posts)
Biggobyboo Sat 31-Aug-19 18:36:20

I’m a mature student (Master’s degree) and I’ve previously worked in professional office jobs. I’ve recently started a part time job on a make-up counter to earn some pin money and to get me out of the house. I always thought it seemed like a fun job and I like skincare and cosmetics.

When I sent back my contract to HR I mentioned I had my wedding coming up and a week off for my honeymoon. They said that was no problem.

I started the job and discovered my manager has the week of my honeymoon booked off for a holiday and flies out on my wedding day. The full time assistant is being a bridesmaid at another wedding that day so there is no cover in the store.

My manager said I cannot have the time off. I thought she was joking so I said “sure, I’ll just re-arrange it for the following week then!” She said that I should make it at least a couple of weeks after HER holiday. I explained that it wasn’t possible to cancel my wedding and she said it was a shame I wasn’t showing my dedication to the brand and being a team player so early on in the job. No more has been said as she has gone off sick so it’s just me and the other assistant. I can’t do too much (paid) overtime as I’m studying so she’s being funny with me. I’m contracted for 15 hours a week but I’m doing 22.5 hours currently to cover. The brand is recruiting for another part time assistant.

So should I just hand in my week’s notice now or wait until the week of my wedding? If I leave now, the other assistant will have nobody else so there will be no cover. The store is open around 60 hours a week but I’ve noticed the other brands leave their counters unmanned a lot of the time where they have no staff.

If I leave just before the wedding there will still be no cover for that weekend.

Any ideas? I’ve never worked anywhere this crazy before!

proseccoaficionado Thu 05-Sep-19 05:12:38

@Biggobyboo not another beauty counter, please😂 soooo, please, tell me, was it Urban Decay?

magratvonlipwig Thu 05-Sep-19 03:37:38

I think you are being far more thoughtful than they deserve. Quit whenever you want.
You dont need to be concerned with their staffing issues

Biggobyboo Wed 04-Sep-19 19:02:58

Thanks everyone! I was also offered an interview at the Liz Earle counter recently but not sure if that’s any better? Think I’ll give up on the retail world and stick with academia! grin

MK1975 Tue 03-Sep-19 15:31:37

This one is for the Dilbert series!. Honestly if there isn't enough empathy for you to attend YOUR wedding you are much better off jumping this ship. Companies go to great length to ensure their employees are happy and can contribute ... This is not one of those places

MaggietheHorseThief Tue 03-Sep-19 15:27:52

* Boom45 - yes, I’ve noticed that a lot of the old school store staff are funny with me because I’m a student. When they ask what I’ve done before they make faces at each other when I tell them. One of the ladies at another counter said “so what are you doing here then if you have a fancy degree?” I thought I had been really breezy and smiley when I said “oh I used to do xyz but I’ve taken some time out to go back to university” but they don’t seem to like that.*

I got this exact attitude working in Debenhams while I was a student. People couldn't resist making digs about it.

I also had a little hitler for a manager and when she told me I couldn't have a day off (with a week's notice) for my grandmother's funeral, I just quit. I know I was very privileged and lucky to be able to do that though - it's awful for people who don't have that luxury and have to fight against the shitty behaviour of bad managers.

I would see where you get with HR, but don't feel bad about quitting if they won't accommodate you. You've been totally reasonable - some people are just arseholes.

Intheupsidedown Tue 03-Sep-19 15:19:23

I have seen this in the sun today as well. Slow news day... obviously too hard for them to write about boris

illybean Tue 03-Sep-19 14:53:23

Oh @Biggobyboo happy for you just read the update

illybean Tue 03-Sep-19 14:52:32

I had this in a job. Contact HR and then if not quit. I did actually quit the job that wouldn’t let me have my wedding day and honeymoon off. I thought they were mucking about but they weren’t.
I started my new job 2 weeks before my wedding and they gave me balloons and presents so was a pretty good trade in!

BrightYellowDaffodil Tue 03-Sep-19 14:49:00

Good for you, OP. Glad it worked out for the better in the end smile

Cautionsharpblade Tue 03-Sep-19 14:36:27

Plus you’ve made it into The Sun

Mummyoflittledragon Tue 03-Sep-19 11:27:56

Well that’s a great outcome all round.

yellowallpaper Tue 03-Sep-19 10:15:07


proseccoaficionado Tue 03-Sep-19 08:47:16

@shielahussain I thought it's Urban Decay, I worked for them in my uni years and I've been asked not to go to my graduation because they have no cover. Hahahahaa, didn't happen, of course. Maybe all make-up counters are shit with their employees

coffeewithcream Tue 03-Sep-19 06:37:34

If you agreed on taking those specific dates off beforehand then they will honour that. Speak to HR asap ;)

justilou1 Tue 03-Sep-19 05:14:04

Wow! You’re winning all round!!!

Coyoacan Tue 03-Sep-19 03:31:58

Great outcome, OP. Many years ago I was working in a shop and gave them one month's notice because I was getting married and emigrating. They dismissed me the next week because they had already found my replacement. So much for being considerate.

Jesaminecollins Tue 03-Sep-19 02:38:42

I started a new job several years ago and I had a holiday booked to Corfu and I told them I wouldn't be starting until after my holidays. So I think they either accept you will be having time off to celebrate your wedding or you will have to leave. If they value you they will arrange for someone to cover for your wedding.

ilovesooty Tue 03-Sep-19 01:42:26

Glad HR were nice. Good luck with the new job offer.

angelfacecuti75 Tue 03-Sep-19 01:28:53

See what hr say before you leave. If ypu do leavd make sure they know why and hsnd your notice in a week before the wedding or maybe 2...

ZiggyB Mon 02-Sep-19 18:49:13

Good for you OP. Enjoy your wedding! 💃🏾

shielahussain Mon 02-Sep-19 18:31:32

Contact HR, put everything in writing and clarify. Is it Clarins by any chance?

Drknittingfrog Mon 02-Sep-19 14:57:54

Such a happy ending op! Good luck in the new job and all the best for your wedding!

BlackCatSleeping Mon 02-Sep-19 14:25:08

That sounds good, OP. The job wasn’t a good fit for you. I hope the new job goes better. flowers

CharlottesPleb Mon 02-Sep-19 14:18:14

Suddenly disallowing someone the time off for their wedding, given that they have already booked it which you had, is effectively a summary dismissal.

I mean it's like insisting someone can't have the time off who is in an ambulance to hospital, it has to be a case of ok say what you like, now obviously bye.

A competent manager does not insist on ordering things that clearly will not happen, because they understand that authority means nothing if you do this. Sounds like a bit of a Cnut to me.

JingsMahBucket Mon 02-Sep-19 14:03:05

@Biggobyboo that’s great news! It looks like everything is working out anyway. smile

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »