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To not have told him where the bread was from?

(247 Posts)
ItsOnlyBloodyBread Sun 25-Aug-19 19:45:36

This morning it was DHs turn to make Coffee and Breakfast (I did it yesterday). He did the coffees as soon as we came down but I had to ask him 3 times when he was doing breakfast.

Eventually he went in to so us some toast and then asked which shop I got the bread from. Strange question I thought as it was a well known brand and can be purchased at literally any of the local shops. So I asked why he asked. This, apparently, was my first mistake as you 'cant answer a question with a question'. Who knew? So he asked again, where it was from, I said it's Robert's bread, why does it matter which shop it's from? He then stormed in the living room saying he's not doing my toast, cos I can't answer a simple question blah blah blah. I said it was an irrelevant question, why would it matter if it was from Tesco or Morrisons? It was Robert's bread. He said the packaging was different and he didn't recognize it...if he'd read the name on the package he would have surely known it was Robert's? Just as a side note he does this all the time, doesn't look at or for things properly and asks he where something is that is literally in front of his face.

Anyway, so this started a big what I can only describe as a tantrum on his part, yes at the ages of nearly 30. I laughed and said he was being ridiculous over a loaf of bread. Laughing at his immaturity was apparently my second mistake.

So I've been in bed all day, as I didn't want to be around him when he's in a vile mood. It's been lovely actually, I've read a whole book, had a nap, played a game on my phone, read mumsnet, just lovely really. This may have been my third mistake as he's been downstairs with DS all day.

I tried to call a truce earlier but was ignored.

He's now gone out whilst I'm putting DS to bed and when I've text to ask where he's gone his reply was 'Im just doing what you're doing and not answering a simple question'

God give me strength, I didn't realise I'd married a 5 year old. Oh well, I'll have the whole bed to myself tonight as he will no doubt sleep on the sofa. I'll take that as a win I think. And yes he's normally like this, 'The king of petty' I call him.

So WIBU to have not told him where the bread was from?

HoneysuckIejasmine Sun 25-Aug-19 19:47:23

I agree it's an odd question, but would it really have killed you to answer him?

TidyDancer Sun 25-Aug-19 19:49:05

He's petty but you could've answered him. It doesn't excuse his childish behaviour since though.

Cherrysoup Sun 25-Aug-19 19:50:19

Why didn’t you just tell him? You are both petty and ridiculous. What point were you trying to make?

Cwtches123 Sun 25-Aug-19 19:51:16

Why couldn't you just answer?

Quaffy Sun 25-Aug-19 19:51:23

Everything about this is ridiculous. Ridiculous not to answer the question, ridiculous for him to react the way he has.

Marnie76 Sun 25-Aug-19 19:51:23

You were both being childish. Did your son not wonder what you were doing?

SirJamesTalbotAndHisSpeculum Sun 25-Aug-19 19:51:36

You were not BU.

And he sounds like my Ex, who I divorced many years ago.

What happens if the argument continues? Does he become violent?

It sounds like you're afraid of him and probably with good reason.

BendydickCuminsnatch Sun 25-Aug-19 19:51:47

Jesus Christ how exhausting. A whole day of sulking over bread?? Bizarre!

GreenTulips Sun 25-Aug-19 19:52:05

Drives me crackers! Why couldn’t you just answer the bloody question? It’s not difficult is it?

Tesco’s - job done

It’s now taught in schools to answer the actually question.

BarbaraofSeville Sun 25-Aug-19 19:52:17

So you're saying he's got to nearly Thirty Years Old and he doesn't know how/where to buy a loaf of bread?

Does he think the food in your house is flown in by pixies?

ItsOnlyBloodyBread Sun 25-Aug-19 19:52:47

Yes I know I could have answered him, and I was actually going to, I only asked why he wanted to know first.

Maybe it was the phrasing of the question, if he'd have asked 'What bread is this?' that might have been better. Then he probably would have moaned at me for answering 'Read the packaging!'

Marnie76 Sun 25-Aug-19 19:53:49

What a waste of a lovely day

SirJamesTalbotAndHisSpeculum Sun 25-Aug-19 19:54:14

Are you afraid of him OP?

Wellmet Sun 25-Aug-19 19:54:25

You refused to answer a simple question, then sulked in bed all day leaving him to do the childcare.
Who did you say had the tantrum?

EllenAshSky1 Sun 25-Aug-19 19:54:31

Why not have just answered?? Wouldn't it have been alot less hassle than this!?

I personally think it was argumentative and pretty immature not to have just said where you got the bread from.

Everything that has happened since is a result of you not answering a very simple question.

You're unreasonable and sound hard work

YouFellAsleeep Sun 25-Aug-19 19:55:01

Yes, you where being unreasonable. Why not just say “I got it from Tesco, why?” Or something along those lines. Bit weird to not just answer. Not that his tantrum was any better.

chickenyhead Sun 25-Aug-19 19:55:46

I too wouldn't have answered as it is totally irrelevant.

He got up looking for a fight and he created one. If he didn't want to make the toast he should've simply said so.

It seems to me that he is seething with resentment for you. Do you equally share chores etc plus work/income? He has a problem and instead of talking about it he is hating on you.

You both need to call a time out and talk like adults.

tinatsarina Sun 25-Aug-19 19:56:18

I don't think ywbu it doesn't matter where it's from. It doesn't change the taste. Does he usually do this?

SirJamesTalbotAndHisSpeculum Sun 25-Aug-19 19:58:15

Does he become physically aggressive if arguments like this one escalate?

22Giraffes Sun 25-Aug-19 19:58:17

This is all just bizarre and pointless, you should have just told him where the bread was from!

Chitarra Sun 25-Aug-19 19:58:33

It doesn’t sound as if either of you likes the other one very much.

ItsOnlyBloodyBread Sun 25-Aug-19 19:58:51

Yes I know and this is what I said to him, all this over bread!!!

No he doesn't get violent but he's just absolutely horrible when he's in 'that' mood iykwim. I'm not scared of him. Would just rather leave the situation and let things calm down. Makes things worse otherwise.

Yes DS did wonder what I was doing and came up every so often and we sat in bed reading for a bit. All his toys are downstairs though so obviously he stayed down there playing most of the time. He was oblivious to the initial argument though as he had his headphones on.

BlockedAndDeleted Sun 25-Aug-19 19:59:43

So...where was the bread from?

SistersOfPercy Sun 25-Aug-19 20:00:50

YABU. Jacksons Bread is where it's at grin

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