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AIBU - sisters hen party

(99 Posts)
happygoluckymeXD Wed 14-Aug-19 16:39:05

Wonderful sister is getting married! 👰 I am maid of honour and therefore responsible for organizing the hen party! I want to surprise her with a fun hen party in Ibiza with lots of surprises. I want her to never feel she missed out on a proper hen party and has an amazing memory of a weekend all about her.

My sister is lovely, however, she can be a control freak, is very hard to please, and doesn't always know what is best for her. What I mean by this is she is not very open to trying new things (such as nights out) but will have such an amazing time when I spring them upon her.

She has given me a rule which is "nothing wild"

AIBU to break this rule?

OwlinaTree Wed 14-Aug-19 16:39:58

YABU organising a hen night in Ibiza unless you happen to live in Ibiza.

AryaStarkWolf Wed 14-Aug-19 16:40:14


milienhaus Wed 14-Aug-19 16:41:29

Yeah don’t do that - when you have a hen do it in Ibiza and she will get to experience it then. For hers, stick to her one rule.

SheSaidNoFuckThat Wed 14-Aug-19 16:41:53

Yes! What happened to a night out in town with your friends?

Yogurtcoveredricecake Wed 14-Aug-19 16:41:58

Is this hen do for her or you?

whothedaddy Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:08

I hate the trend of destination Hen do's. Expecting friends to spend hundreds they may not have just because someone is getting married is crazy.

Also, I think it would be poor taste to organise something your sister wouldn't want just because you think she will have a good time.

Youwanapizzame Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:09

You can have a fun weekend all about her without it being wild... please dont do wild if she has asked you not to.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:09

*She has given me a rule which is "nothing wild"

AIBU to break this rule?*

YES! Why would you make her hen party all about something she doesn't want to do? Sounds like it's more what YOU want to do.

Why do you need to go to Ibiza?

MrsPinkCup Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:15

YABU. I requested the same thing and my sisters ignored and I ended up going round town with L signs on, a stripper and they tried to get me to dates.

I hated every minute of it I wanted a meal
Out and maybe a cocktail making lesson or to book a house for the weekend.

Still get pissed off when I think about it.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:31


Ask her what she wants then book it.

Pipandmum Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:52

I think you’re kidding right? Sounds like your ideal hens night not hers!
Are her friends even able to afford Ibiza?

BloomingHydrangea Wed 14-Aug-19 16:42:58

Do you have an Ibiza budget?
And do her other guests?
Does she like Ibiza?

MrsPinkCup Wed 14-Aug-19 16:43:21

* Tried to get me to do dares - not dates!

NavyBerry Wed 14-Aug-19 16:43:23

Oh dear of course YABVVVVU!

fedup21 Wed 14-Aug-19 16:43:41

YABVU unless you live in Ibiza.

Why don’t you go out for a night?

Alloftit Wed 14-Aug-19 16:45:04

Oh behave yourself. You sound well meaning but your direction with this is waaaaay off. You say she’s hard to please but then you plan on entirely ignoring what she actually wants.

pinkstar01 Wed 14-Aug-19 16:45:56

YABU. I am like your sister and I couldn't think of anything worse than a night out. And if my sister did this to me I would think her really selfish for only thinking of her own fun.

happygoluckymeXD Wed 14-Aug-19 16:46:28

ok everyone thanks for the input smile

Summerunderway Wed 14-Aug-19 16:47:16

Unless you personally are funding it don't be a cf and throw expenses lists at people who won't /can't afford to pay.
Yabu to not listen to your dsis when she has entrusted you to hear her wishes anyway.

SauvignonBlanche Wed 14-Aug-19 16:47:27

she is not very open to trying new things

So why are you going to try and make her?

AryaStarkWolf Wed 14-Aug-19 16:47:31

Sister : I don't want anything wild

MOH : Lets go to Ibiza then!!!!!

OwlinaTree Wed 14-Aug-19 16:48:45

Have a chat with her about what she would like to do, then work on something round that.

Thingsdogetbetter Wed 14-Aug-19 16:49:28

That's YOUR idea of a proper hen 'night', not HERS! It's more likely to ruin the occasion for her, than give her amazing memories. Don't make assumptions she'll enjoy something that is the opposite for what she actually likes and what she has specifically asked for.

I'd be fucking furious if you did that after I'd clearly asked for nothing wild!

And it's pretty patronising to think she doesn't know what's 'best for her', but you do!

CalmdownJanet Wed 14-Aug-19 16:50:17

I smell a reverse

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