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To think this is really grabby- bordering on cheekyfuckery?

(273 Posts)
FurCoatNoSnickers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:01:45

Ds is at a newish school - he was so happy to have been invited to a karting birthday party - turns out the whole class were invited - details were - the date- the activity-transport provided (it’s a 80 mile round trip) and a request of Amazon vouchers for present. In the last few weeks since they broke up I’ve been updated with further texts from the mother of birthday boy asking for deposits for the karting (£20) and the remainder on the day (£30) THEN that was followed up by a request for £20 for the transport hmm

This morning she (in my opinion) has the gall to request we pack a generous picnic with ice packs and pack extra so the birthday boy doesn’t have to bring anything

I was going to decline following the minibus request but ds was so happy to be invited - I think this is the final straw and I’ll instead take ds and a friend karting myself at this rate

DH says I should like it or lump it and if everyone else seems to be going then it would be a shame for ds to miss out

BitchPeas Thu 08-Aug-19 12:02:34

That’s awful. How old are they??

Mileysmiley Thu 08-Aug-19 12:04:32

My son had one of those party's but I certainly didn't charge his mates for it .... I would make up an excuse if I was you.

LenoVentura Thu 08-Aug-19 12:04:44

That's not a birthday party, it's just an event that coincides with a birthday. I'd tell your DS that it turns out it's not a party after all and you'll be taking him and a friend separately as it's cheaper that way.

MinisterforCheekyFuckery Thu 08-Aug-19 12:05:04

She is without question, a cheeky fucker! Ordinarily I would decline on account of the ridiculousness but you say he's at a new school...that does make a difference. If going to this party is going to help him make friends and settle in then I might have to suck it up and just seethe privately.

OnlyFoolsnMothers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:05:31

wtf....yes thats grabby...I think she will be receiving a lot of declines

FurCoatNoSnickers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:05:32

They’re 14

It IS bad isn’t it?

Sounds like she’s just arranged a trip and has engineered everything around her getting freebies

mynameisMrG Thu 08-Aug-19 12:06:09

I think it’s more than bordering on cheekyfuckery!

Knittedfairies Thu 08-Aug-19 12:06:32

So that's £70 + Amazon vouchers + a 'generous picnic'? I think that's well-beyond the borders of CF!

Bravelurker Thu 08-Aug-19 12:06:59

I hate unexpected random costs and extra add ons, but you know deep down that on this occasion you are going to have to suck it up and just thank God you can afford it.

Travis1 Thu 08-Aug-19 12:07:03

WTF?! Nope, nope. What a cheeky cretin! Sounds like birthday boy will be paying sod all. Have you given her any money?

FurCoatNoSnickers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:07:55

Only fools- I texted 2 other mums that I recognised the surnames of in a cheery smalltalk way and they’ve both accepted.
The birthday party mum told me she needed deposits so she could hire ANOTHER bus so loads must be going?

Also- there’s no way they will let 30 kids on a track so I suspect they’ll be loads of hanging around etc

FurCoatNoSnickers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:08:44

@MinisterforCheekyFuckery- yes DH thinks the same!

FetchezLaVache Thu 08-Aug-19 12:09:16

That is absolutely shameless!! Did you pay the £20 deposit?

CharityConundrum Thu 08-Aug-19 12:10:05

Am I reading this correctly- it's £70 plus present and picnic?!?!

FurCoatNoSnickers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:10:14

@Bravelurker- Dh lost his job in March- totally agree

Bravelurker Thu 08-Aug-19 12:10:43

Oh I didn't realise he was 14. That is different, I was picturing a very young sad little disappointed face. Well in that case, go it alone.

FurCoatNoSnickers Thu 08-Aug-19 12:10:55

I’ve paid nowt.
I thought it was a mistake

VincentVanGoughandhisear Thu 08-Aug-19 12:11:39

I would be so annoyed at this.

It's not a party. A party doesn't mean other kids having to pay to attend.

It's horrible for her to drip feed all of this too after you have accepted.

I would have a good mind to tell your son that instead of going, he can have the 70 odd quid to spend on himself!

whothedaddy Thu 08-Aug-19 12:11:45

just out of interest how much does it actually cost at this carting place? not only does it look like she is covering her sons place but she must be making a tidy profit at £70 a head for a whole class our local carting place is £25 a head for kids parties!

Pinkout Thu 08-Aug-19 12:12:49

It will be sad for your DS to miss out especially at his age but I can understand why you’d give it a miss. That’s not exactly a birthday party, it may as well be a school trip! Of course you shouldn’t have to pay for absolutely everything, the transport isn’t even provided as mentioned in the invitation since she’s now asking everyone to pay for it!

This takes CF to a whole other level.

Miniloso Thu 08-Aug-19 12:14:01

That’s insane. You are paying for the birthday boys party, travel & feeding him!! Bonkers.

KatharinaRosalie Thu 08-Aug-19 12:14:28

That's another level of CFery. If you invite people to a birthday party, surely you will host and cater? OK I could understand if someone is unexpectedly strapped for cash, and offers that instead of gifts, people could pay their own entrance. But to ask people to PAY for the party AND give gifts?

Send DS but without vouchers. If CF complains, tell her that well of course you understood the deposits were instead of the vouchers she initially asked for, otherwise it would be really cheeky!

HeadintheiClouds Thu 08-Aug-19 12:14:47

God, what a self absorbed idiot. Are the other mums really happy to accept; seeing nothing wrong with it? Hard to believe.

PorkHollywood Thu 08-Aug-19 12:14:58

Bare faced cheek! £100-ish for a new classmate's birthday bash? Nah thanks.

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