Aibu to not want dd to call MIL mama?

(100 Posts)
etotheb Sat 27-Jul-19 16:40:53

So my sister in law children call my mother in law "mama". My husband made it clear in the beginning that he didn't feel comfortable with it and we wouldn't be following the tradition.

Now fast forward 16 months and my dd has started calling me mama as babies do lol.. last night at her house my toddler was walking in the corridor shouting mama and just before she opened the door to come to me I heard mil interrupt my toddler and said "no thats mum, I'm mama, mama mama mama"

She is quite overbearing and will refuse to say "my grandchildren" she will say "my daughter, my child" etc so I think she's refusing to acknowledge she isn't the only mother around?

Aibu to not want this to happen?

OP’s posts: |
MrsRobinStrike Sat 27-Jul-19 16:42:32

Mama is obviously what your child calls you. She's Nana or whatever. She's also a nut

PianoPiano Sat 27-Jul-19 16:43:15


Aquamarine1029 Sat 27-Jul-19 16:43:33

YANBU. Tell your husband to deal with her or you will.

HermioneWeasley Sat 27-Jul-19 16:44:27

She sounds bonkers. Your DH needs to remind her that’s not what your kids will be calling her

SiennaSienna Sat 27-Jul-19 16:44:37

YANBU. She’s your child. Keep correcting her. “Silly granny, she’s not Mama” will do the trick.

Owwlie Sat 27-Jul-19 16:46:15

YANBU op, it’s quite disrespectful to you. Every time she does this just correct her, and get your husband to have a word with her.

Also, if she’s calling your daughter ‘my daughter’ I would correct her on that as well.

Such strange behaviour.

weltenbummler Sat 27-Jul-19 16:46:37

YANBU. ask your husband to remind her that you as a family are not comfortable at her declaring herself as your child's "mama". she has had her turn at being a mother. for your child she is the grandmother!

Pipandmum Sat 27-Jul-19 16:48:41

You should stop her when she says things like that. Say ‘no I’m her mama’ thank you!

Sunburntnoseandears Sat 27-Jul-19 16:48:42

Swap it for nanna at every opportunity. Say to mil don't be silly, dd only has one mama .. Perks of the labour - tinkly laugh..
Failing that dh needs to tell her to back the fluff off or she can stay away...

BoronationStreet Sat 27-Jul-19 16:48:56

What the whaaaaaat? She sounds deranged. You need to nip that nonsense in the bud immediately. Don't let her bully you OP.

Littlejets Sat 27-Jul-19 16:49:40

She’s your child. Keep correcting her. “Silly granny, she’s not Mama” will do the trick.


Bookworm4 Sat 27-Jul-19 16:50:11

Just don’t go round, she sounds batshit.

GruciusMalfoy Sat 27-Jul-19 16:51:21

YANBU. You like being called mama, she doesn't get to override that.

Xyzzzzz Sat 27-Jul-19 16:53:13

Have you posted this before? Sounds like something that was posted a couple of weeks ago

Singlenotsingle Sat 27-Jul-19 16:53:33

She's Nana. Although if your dc spends much time with the cousins, she might call her the same as they do.

etotheb Sat 27-Jul-19 16:53:55

When I told her "that's Nana" she laughed and said "oh she will soon call you mum and call me mama like the cousins" shockhmm

OP’s posts: |
CasparBloomberg Sat 27-Jul-19 16:55:30

I don't suppose she's from Derbyshire is she? hmm I grew up there and the standard word we used for Grandma around there was Mama (pronounced mom-mar with a northern accent as opposed to southern mam-mar variant for mummy).

doctorsnewcompanion Sat 27-Jul-19 16:55:53

She’s not Mama and should respect your wishes to not call herself that to your DC

GruciusMalfoy Sat 27-Jul-19 16:56:31

Thats when you tell her, "haha, no she won't, because she'll hear nana from us until it sticks".

topcat2014 Sat 27-Jul-19 16:56:46

There must be some deluded folk about?

Who even thinks that is acceptable?

Train DD to say "Grandmama" that will soon put her in her place.

doctorsnewcompanion Sat 27-Jul-19 16:57:19

Also it’s not certain that DD will call you mum, we’re in the northwest and I’m mama or mama bear to DC (10yo)

NoddyAndBessie Sat 27-Jul-19 16:57:22

Not if they don't see the stupid idiot, they won't.

Treaclesweet Sat 27-Jul-19 16:57:37

Did you post before? Or is this craziness somehow common?! Either way YANBU

etotheb Sat 27-Jul-19 16:58:57

I did then it got deleted before I could see any replies... the cousins only come down once every 3 months or so.. so they don't spend hardly any time together (ironically their down for 4 weeks but I'm busy all these summer holidays muhahahahahahha)

OP’s posts: |

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