My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To have thought this was really wrong and completely heartless.

51 replies

Lily715 · 16/07/2019 18:55

At asda today. Old homeless man sat outside minding his own business. Not asking anyone for anything. It is my local supermarket and I see him most times I go. I've never seen him begging or asking anyone for anything. Asda security come out and tell him he has to go and sit somewhere else because customers are complaining about him. He became really upset and was explaining that he isn't asking anyone for anything, it's just a sheltered place to sit. Who would complain about a poor homeless man sat on the pavement who isnt doing anyone any harm? I thought it was really heartless and unfair. I felt a bit ashamed of our country to be honest.

OP posts:
Report
araiwa · 16/07/2019 18:59

So what did you say or do about it?

Report
Ipigglemustdie · 16/07/2019 19:00

Ashamed of your country? You homeless people happen in other places too. And probably have to put up with more than a complaint

Report
Ipigglemustdie · 16/07/2019 19:01

You know*

Report
Redglitter · 16/07/2019 19:04

Who would complain about a poor homeless man sat on the pavement who isnt doing anyone any harm

Loads of people will & do. I work for the Police and we get several calls every day in the course of a shift reporting this very thing and wanting officers to move them on.

Report
Heratnumber7 · 16/07/2019 19:09

Did you stand up for him OP?
If not, it's not your country you ought to be ashamed of.

Report
Rachelover40 · 16/07/2019 19:11

That definitely was heartless, I don't understand anyone complaining about him.

Report
Lily715 · 16/07/2019 19:11

@araiwa I told the security guard that I thought it was really unfair. He said he was just doing his job which I understand.

@Ipigglemustdie of course I know there are homeless people in other countries?? And yes I know they might experience worse but this doesn't make it okay.

@redglitter maybe I should have phrased it differently. I am aware that people do but I don't understand why people would complain about someone who is clearly having a really difficult time, in a crap situation and not doing anyone any harm. Bit of a lack of compassion in these replies.

OP posts:
Report
Lily715 · 16/07/2019 19:12

@Rachelover40 me neither. Just go and do your shopping and leave him be is my opinion.

OP posts:
Report
Redglitter · 16/07/2019 19:20

I should have added we dont necessarily send officers. Just because someone objects to some poor soul sitting outside their shop doesn't mean theyll get moved. If they're sitting minding their own business &bothering noone they get left alone

Report
skybluee · 16/07/2019 19:22

It frustrates me too because where are they actually mean to sit? A Co-Op near here put up a horrible no loitering sign right where the (very nice) homeless man used to sit, he didn't ask people for money or cause any trouble, one member of staff was utterly vile to him, overheard her saying some horrible things. He couldn't exactly sit on a suburban street just of houses. I get him milkshakes (what he asked for).

Report
skybluee · 16/07/2019 19:23
  • Just to make that clear, when we were talking I offered to get him something as I was going in, and asked if there was anything he'd like (milkshakes is what he chose). He didn't approach me and ask for anything. Just in case that sounded contradictory.
Report
PumpkinPie2016 · 16/07/2019 19:46

I think it's very harsh of people to complain if he genuinely just sits there not bothering anyone. I used to stop and chat/give the odd thing to a man who used to sit near sainsburys. He also never asked for anything/bothered anyone, just set in a sheltered spot. He was very pleasant to talk to.

The only time I get irked is when I see the 3 people who bag near my local Tesco - you literally can't enter/leave the store without them badgering you for money and then are very persistent. It is also well known locally that they have a flat/claim benefits etc. And are not actually homeless. To me this is wrong and doesn't help those who are genuinely in need as people are out off giving.

Report
NoBaggyPants · 16/07/2019 20:02

You're not unreasonable at all OP. Some people automatically assume all homeless people are drug addicts and/ or not really homeless. They don't realise that many of us are only a few month's pay packet away from the same situation.

Report
OnlyaMan · 16/07/2019 20:35

I can see why an "Old homeless man sat outside minding his own business. Not asking anyone for anything" would not bother you-or me.
But what about the next homeless person, and the next one, and the next one, and so on?
If some rather timid Asda shoppers are concerned about this, I think Asda have little real choice.
The usual Asda is quite a big place, but is this entrance may necessitate (perhaps elderly) shoppers almost brushing past him. I have seen this myself with smaller shops.
After all, Asda own the place-they can decide what they are willing to accept.
The OP owns her own doorstep-how happy would she be with this same man sitting there?
I hope the old chap finds somewhere else to sit.

Report
WisestIsShe · 16/07/2019 20:40

Our Aldi take the pragmatic approach. Thete is often a homeless person sheltering at the front of the store (although not right by the doors) Many people, including myself, ask if they can buy anything for them while shopping. I think it's increased sandwich, drinks and chocolate bar sales! i understand it's not really a flippant issue

Report
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 16/07/2019 20:41

YANBU. The oh so perfect snobs complaining should remember Anyone can be come homeless. There but for the Grace of God and all that.
Also as they say "Be nice to those while you're at the top as you might meet them on your way back down.

Report
RamblinRosie · 17/07/2019 01:53

Lily I see a similar situation at our local supermarket, rough sleeper with dog, sits at the back by the car park, bowl for money. No active begging. He occasionally gets moved on by police, but mostly is left alone.

Actually, he’s well looked after by the locals, probably because his staffie is adorable.

He’s a nice man. We chat, but I don’t know how he got here.

I don’t see how he can get out of this situation.

Since 2010 the number of rough sleepers has increased by 165% according to official statistics. I find this shocking!

Report
Fakenametodayhey · 17/07/2019 11:30

I used to give money to a 'nice homeless man' until my dad told me his history and why he became homeless.
Now I walk past and don't even look at him because he destroyed so many peoples lives that he deserves to be ignored.
Well actually he deserves be to be in jail.

Report
mussolini9 · 17/07/2019 11:36

I used to give money to a 'nice homeless man' until my dad told me his history and why he became homeless.

My sister plays your dad's role about every homeless person on her turf.
All the "histories" are anectdotal, & every single one portrays the homeless person in a bad light. Victim blaming.

How does your dad know the hisory? Who did he hear it from? How do they know?

My sister would like to believe that every homeless person she slags off & acts superior about is living it large in a hidden mansion with every luxury paid for by begging.
She is batshit.

Report
Rachelover40 · 17/07/2019 17:47

Fakenametodayhey, obviously not all homeless people are nice, there are bound to be some who have a dodgy past. The op just took this man at face value and thought it was wrong for people to object to him sitting there, minding his own business. I agree with her.

Report
RamblinRosie · 18/07/2019 02:03

I don’t doubt it “my”nice homeless man has issues; drugs, drink or prison. Probably multiple.

But that doesn’t mean that he should starve in a gutter.

Report
RubberTreePlant · 18/07/2019 03:32

? I thought it was really heartless and unfair. I felt a bit ashamed of our country to be honest.

It's disgusting, but it's company policy, not national law. Be ashamed of Asda.

Did you TELL them you thought it was 'heartless and unfair'? Speaking up is how to challenge this.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Havingarethink · 18/07/2019 03:45

Tbf to fakenames dad, he may well know the history of the local homeless people because I certainly do. I'm not ashamed to say that I will happily hand over a couple of pounds to the homeless people in my town centre, knowing full well what they will spend it on as I know them from my neighbourhood or school .
Most of them come from large family's and have parents still alive , children - grown-up in some cases , siblings and nieces and nephews. And I know for a fact that most of them have been problematic from childhood, which is not always their fault due to undiagnosed MH issues and learning difficulties. The drugs usually came long before the homelessness and criminal convictions.
The reason I feel bad for them is because as much as I know any one of us could end up in a really bad situation, I know that I have people that would never see me on the streets and I don't even have a large family. These people are rock bottom, have exhausted all the good will of family and friends and I know what they really want and giving them cash is a way of making their lot in life a little bit easier and lessen the chance of them of breaking the law by mugging people etc.

Report
akerman · 18/07/2019 04:33

YANBU at all. Poor man. How bloody spiteful to report him.

Report
Birdie6 · 18/07/2019 04:37

I'd prefer to think that all districts would provide seating in a safe area for homeless people. Unfortunately they can be a bit off-putting for shoppers if they are directly outside the shop entrance. There was a fellow who used to sit outside our local shopping centre, and he'd talk really loudly to everyone who walked out. Harmless, yes, but very off-putting if you didn't know him.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.